Today not only marks my return to the blog but also the return of Celebrity Poker Showdown (CPS). Tonight the Bravo show starts a new season with mostly b-list celebrities playing Texas Hold ‘Em for their favorite charities. Like all poker shows in the last few years CPS started out with huge ratings. Poker was our new national pastime and we couldn’t get enough of it no matter who was playing.
As someone who considered himself a poker fan/player prior to Chris Moneymaker’s trend setting win at the World Series of Poker (WSOP), I was cold at first to the celebs. Why would I want to watch a bunch of no nothings make bonehead bets and calls? The answers came back in spades; it was funny, it was quick in that each round of the tourney ends each episode, and best of all it usually made me feel good about my own poker prowess.
Now we’re starting up another tournament and I’m not feeling the magic. I could blame Bravo for scrapping the bottom of the celeb barrel but they’ve still got too much goodwill from me in escrow, for shelving Kevin Pollock for Dave Foley a few years back. No, I think the blame goes to the poker movement in general.
A quick search of poker on my DVR brings back 72 results in the span of 10 days. With the different lengths of the various programs it broke down to about 8 hours a day of poker programming. That my friends, is what you call overkill. Back in the day the televised poker tourneys meant something, with events like the WSOP and the US Poker Open. When the Travel Channel started their series of shows called the World Poker Tour it often included many international players and often filled the gaps between the major televised events. CSP filled the celebrity niche and it seemed like we had achieved poker nirvana. Of course when there’s a buck to be made, TV executives never shy away. Now we’ve got more manufactured all star tournaments then you can shake a stick at. We’ve got pros on a battle of the sexes show. We’ve even got WSOP satellite tourneys. Plus there’s the teaching shows, the infomercials, and the CSP knockoffs. It’s all too much and me thinks the public might be rebelling. The buzz on poker seems to be down and given our country’s short attention span that might be a natural progression. However I’d argue that when you saturate the airwaves you take away the uniqueness of the experience. It’s a lesson Regis Philbin learned, and one poker and Howie Mandel will soon.
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Thursday, May 25, 2006
What I'm...(Hiatus Edition)
I’ll be doing some traveling this fine Memorial Day weekend so I’ll be taking a brief hiatus from posting. To tide you over here’s an early installment of “What I’m…” which includes my thoughts on the Lost finale, so if you’ve got it recorded, beware of spoilers below. I’ll be back posting next week after I’ve had a weekend to memorialize my liver.
What I’m…Suffering Buyer’s Remorse From.
Stephen Colbert at the White House Correspondents Diner- At $1.95 it’s tough to suffer from too much regret but I was expecting so much. I had read how Colbert skewered the administration smack dab in the belly of the beast. I had read how the audience reacted coldly to his speech but that it did not deter Colbert from his task or detract from the humor. So you can imagine that when I saw the opportunity to download it off iTunes I jumped at the chance, after all it was only $1.95. Well maybe it needs the video feed, because while some of it was entertaining overall it fell flat and Colbert seemed extremely awkward at times. To top it off, my download had 2 glitches in it. I’d write to iTunes but then again it was only $1.95.
What I’m…Reading.
“Who’s Your Caddy” By Rick Reilly- I still find it hard to say out loud that I love golf. Growing up I always looked down at golf as a sport for the rich, the elite and the establishment. I remember being introduced to it as an eight year old at my grandmother’s house. She always watched the PGA tour and she had a golf bag in her closet. I was bored to tears watching it on TV and while I enjoyed the putt putt course across the street, that seemed to be a different animal altogether. As I grew older I become a huge sports fan and I began to pay attention to the majors but I still openly mocked people that played.
In 1998 I played my first round of golf under quite possibly the worst conditions ever. As part of a bachelor party I was attending we went to one of the nicer courses in town. The whole group of us were relatively new to golf and our fearless leader turned down a cart and said we would walk the 18 holes. I didn’t know any better so it seemed like a fine idea to me and it might have been except for the fact that it was 95 degrees in the shade. By the time we had walked all 18 holes I had plenty of new ammunition to hate the game.
A couple years later I started playing with some friends my perspective changed. Maybe it was playing with different people, maybe it was playing shorter courses, and maybe it was playing in weather that was fit for an actual human being, whatever the reason I fell in love with golf. Now I try to play as much as possible. I still have the ability of a fourth grader but I don’t care. Many people have noted that I have a competitive attitude that’s on par with Genghis Kahn but somehow on the golf course I could care less if I beat my opponents or not. I just enjoy the game, which finally brings me to the book.
Reilly, who many might know as the guy who writes the back page column for Sports Illustrated, spent a year caddying. In the book he caddies for pro players and celebrities, in tournaments and pro-ams. The result is a crazy funny read that also reminds us why we play the game. His description of being inside the ropes at Amen Corner at the Masters makes me dream that someday I’d be good enough or rich enough to play there. Since neither of those will happen, his description is about as close as I’ll get. Reilly is master of self deprecating humor and manages to bring the funny while also getting to some real truths of the game. My #1 truth is still, “Don’t walk 18 holes when it’s over 90 degrees out.”
What I’m…Listening To.
Top 5 on My iPod
1. Smiley Faces- Gnarls Barkley (Seriously I don’t know what more I can say about these guys. They’re so good they make you regret buying single songs on iTunes ‘cause you know you’ll probably end up buying the whole album.)
2. Promiscuous- Nelly Furtado (I know I called her a pop whore in an earlier column but I also said the song was catchy…damn catchy. Timberland continues to provide some of the best beats in the business.)
3. Just a Thought- Gnarls Barkley (How can a song with such depressing lyrics make you want to thump your speakers cruising down the boulevard?)
4. Girl Next Door- Saving Jane (Before you judge, I did NOT buy this song because it’s the theme song to MTV’s Tiara Girls. I heard the song and then found out it was the theme song. Honest, I still haven’t watched an episode of the show.)
5. Crazy- Gnarls Barkley (Yep, I might have to rename this section, “What Gnarls Barkley songs I’m listening to.”)
What I’m…Watching.
Lost- After watching the series finale of Lost I made the mistake of going online to a couple of message boards. Two hours later, one thing was for certain: Lost is still a show that sparks a passion in people. I read post after post from people swearing off the show for good, complaining they didn’t get enough answers. I’m guessing these same people posted something similar after last year’s finale. Then you had the all the posts from people going over the top in praising the show. These are the fans that post after every episode that the show has achieved a higher level then Twin Peaks or X Files. The best posts last night though, came from people on both sides as they debated whether Man #2 in the snow station scene at the end was actually Matthew Fox (Jack) with a prosthetic nose and make up. Within an hour after the finale there were screenshots that put the two side by side and nicknames for the new guy like “Jacques the bad twin”. About 90 minutes after the show someone had posted a link to IMDB.com for the actor listed in the credits as Man #2. It seemed to prove that it was not Matthew Fox, but as of this morning there were still those that argued it was. This is why the show succeeds. It infuriates, it satisfies, and it challenges the viewer.
There were definitely some infuriating parts last night especially the scenes after Charlie returned to the beach. I’m so tired of these people not talking to each other. While I realize there wouldn’t be much of a show if everyone sat down and shared all their knowledge it gets to be a bit much sometimes. Furthermore, it continues the haphazard way Charlie has been portrayed over the season that has damaged his character. It feels like they let a different writer script Charlie’s scenes from week to week.
The satisfying parts for me came throughout the show. Nice to find out the truth about the crash and the button, but my favorite part came when Jack and co. found the canisters from Pearl station. When “?” aired a couple weeks back I was telling people that maybe the observers are the test subjects and not the button pushers, so seeing that play out last night was satisfying from an egocentric point of view.
Of course like all good cliffhangers the challenging aspect of the show took center stage. What’s the relevance of the four toed foot? Did the look Jack gave Kate and Sawyer at the end mean his plan was to get captured? Will Michael and Walt be rescued? Is that really Walt that left on the boat? Is Penelope Windmore hiring Jack look-alikes to search for Desmond or the Dharma Island? Where are Locke and Ecko? Why is Henry Gale such a badass? All these questions and more are sure not to be answered next season and you know what, I don’t care as long as the wild ride continues.
What I’m…Suffering Buyer’s Remorse From.
Stephen Colbert at the White House Correspondents Diner- At $1.95 it’s tough to suffer from too much regret but I was expecting so much. I had read how Colbert skewered the administration smack dab in the belly of the beast. I had read how the audience reacted coldly to his speech but that it did not deter Colbert from his task or detract from the humor. So you can imagine that when I saw the opportunity to download it off iTunes I jumped at the chance, after all it was only $1.95. Well maybe it needs the video feed, because while some of it was entertaining overall it fell flat and Colbert seemed extremely awkward at times. To top it off, my download had 2 glitches in it. I’d write to iTunes but then again it was only $1.95.
What I’m…Reading.
“Who’s Your Caddy” By Rick Reilly- I still find it hard to say out loud that I love golf. Growing up I always looked down at golf as a sport for the rich, the elite and the establishment. I remember being introduced to it as an eight year old at my grandmother’s house. She always watched the PGA tour and she had a golf bag in her closet. I was bored to tears watching it on TV and while I enjoyed the putt putt course across the street, that seemed to be a different animal altogether. As I grew older I become a huge sports fan and I began to pay attention to the majors but I still openly mocked people that played.
In 1998 I played my first round of golf under quite possibly the worst conditions ever. As part of a bachelor party I was attending we went to one of the nicer courses in town. The whole group of us were relatively new to golf and our fearless leader turned down a cart and said we would walk the 18 holes. I didn’t know any better so it seemed like a fine idea to me and it might have been except for the fact that it was 95 degrees in the shade. By the time we had walked all 18 holes I had plenty of new ammunition to hate the game.
A couple years later I started playing with some friends my perspective changed. Maybe it was playing with different people, maybe it was playing shorter courses, and maybe it was playing in weather that was fit for an actual human being, whatever the reason I fell in love with golf. Now I try to play as much as possible. I still have the ability of a fourth grader but I don’t care. Many people have noted that I have a competitive attitude that’s on par with Genghis Kahn but somehow on the golf course I could care less if I beat my opponents or not. I just enjoy the game, which finally brings me to the book.
Reilly, who many might know as the guy who writes the back page column for Sports Illustrated, spent a year caddying. In the book he caddies for pro players and celebrities, in tournaments and pro-ams. The result is a crazy funny read that also reminds us why we play the game. His description of being inside the ropes at Amen Corner at the Masters makes me dream that someday I’d be good enough or rich enough to play there. Since neither of those will happen, his description is about as close as I’ll get. Reilly is master of self deprecating humor and manages to bring the funny while also getting to some real truths of the game. My #1 truth is still, “Don’t walk 18 holes when it’s over 90 degrees out.”
What I’m…Listening To.
Top 5 on My iPod
1. Smiley Faces- Gnarls Barkley (Seriously I don’t know what more I can say about these guys. They’re so good they make you regret buying single songs on iTunes ‘cause you know you’ll probably end up buying the whole album.)
2. Promiscuous- Nelly Furtado (I know I called her a pop whore in an earlier column but I also said the song was catchy…damn catchy. Timberland continues to provide some of the best beats in the business.)
3. Just a Thought- Gnarls Barkley (How can a song with such depressing lyrics make you want to thump your speakers cruising down the boulevard?)
4. Girl Next Door- Saving Jane (Before you judge, I did NOT buy this song because it’s the theme song to MTV’s Tiara Girls. I heard the song and then found out it was the theme song. Honest, I still haven’t watched an episode of the show.)
5. Crazy- Gnarls Barkley (Yep, I might have to rename this section, “What Gnarls Barkley songs I’m listening to.”)
What I’m…Watching.
Lost- After watching the series finale of Lost I made the mistake of going online to a couple of message boards. Two hours later, one thing was for certain: Lost is still a show that sparks a passion in people. I read post after post from people swearing off the show for good, complaining they didn’t get enough answers. I’m guessing these same people posted something similar after last year’s finale. Then you had the all the posts from people going over the top in praising the show. These are the fans that post after every episode that the show has achieved a higher level then Twin Peaks or X Files. The best posts last night though, came from people on both sides as they debated whether Man #2 in the snow station scene at the end was actually Matthew Fox (Jack) with a prosthetic nose and make up. Within an hour after the finale there were screenshots that put the two side by side and nicknames for the new guy like “Jacques the bad twin”. About 90 minutes after the show someone had posted a link to IMDB.com for the actor listed in the credits as Man #2. It seemed to prove that it was not Matthew Fox, but as of this morning there were still those that argued it was. This is why the show succeeds. It infuriates, it satisfies, and it challenges the viewer.
There were definitely some infuriating parts last night especially the scenes after Charlie returned to the beach. I’m so tired of these people not talking to each other. While I realize there wouldn’t be much of a show if everyone sat down and shared all their knowledge it gets to be a bit much sometimes. Furthermore, it continues the haphazard way Charlie has been portrayed over the season that has damaged his character. It feels like they let a different writer script Charlie’s scenes from week to week.
The satisfying parts for me came throughout the show. Nice to find out the truth about the crash and the button, but my favorite part came when Jack and co. found the canisters from Pearl station. When “?” aired a couple weeks back I was telling people that maybe the observers are the test subjects and not the button pushers, so seeing that play out last night was satisfying from an egocentric point of view.
Of course like all good cliffhangers the challenging aspect of the show took center stage. What’s the relevance of the four toed foot? Did the look Jack gave Kate and Sawyer at the end mean his plan was to get captured? Will Michael and Walt be rescued? Is that really Walt that left on the boat? Is Penelope Windmore hiring Jack look-alikes to search for Desmond or the Dharma Island? Where are Locke and Ecko? Why is Henry Gale such a badass? All these questions and more are sure not to be answered next season and you know what, I don’t care as long as the wild ride continues.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Three Things I Learned on Monday
1. A rotten tomato does not a bad salad make.
Saw DaVinci Code yesterday and I must say I was pleasantly surprised. The big worry I had going in was Tom Hanks performance and his ability to bring Robert Langdon to life. Unfortunately I can report Hanks gives his standard wooden performance peppered with a dash of his once strong comedic instincts. The big surprise is that the movie works despite Hanks. As I noted last week, the press critics were very negative coming out of the Cannes premiere. While I enjoy reviews that contain quotes such as, “Hanks performance makes you long for Kevin Costner,” I got to be honest and say the critics missed the boat on this one. Ron Howard hits a high note in his inconsistent career by staying true to Dan Brown’s novel. The cast, other then Hanks, all put in good performances, especially Sir Ian who trades in Gandalf’s staff for Lord Tebring’s canes. The pacing is extremely strong and the movie is over before you can even think about looking at your watch. A lot of the negative reviews have complained about all the exposition and talking in the film. Guess what, this story needs a lot of explaining, and by utilizing various visual gimmicks Howard keeps it interesting. I’m not saying this is a great film or a perfect film. There are flaws such as the lack of chemistry Hanks has with, well, anyone and a score that’s way over the top. Yet in the end, it’s the perfect summer movie because it provides the viewer with a little substance to go with a lot of flash.
2. Sometimes you can dig yourself a hole that’s so deep you can never crawl out.
Monday also brought us the series finale of Alias. A show that, as previously noted, created so many contradictory plot lines and mythologies that the viewer was often left confused and in the dark. Teasers for the finale promised answers to the Rambaldi mysteries that have carried on throughout the show. I believe the producers had every intention of clearing that up last night before they realized that they too were in the dark. After trying so many different Rambaldi “endgames” over the life of the series I think they were just as lost as the audience. The attempts made to explain things only created more questions. While leaving much of the Rambaldi stuff in the shadows, they did provide some closure though for the characters. The flashbacks were a nice way to tie everything together and the final confrontation between Jack and Sloan was great. If anything it seemed rushed as if they crammed 3 hours of show into 2.
3. If you stick your head in a shark’s mouth enough times eventually it will bite your head off, but in the mean time enjoy the experience.
Last week I criticized 24 for their lackluster season but I held out hope that we’d get a strong season finale. I was rewarded with a twisty two hours that once again gives the show an opportunity to explore new territory next season. Of course the show has a history of not following up on these opportunities so I’ll probably be back in the same disposition next year. On a side note, am I the only one who’d like to see a sitcom with Chloe and her newly introduced ex-husband? That, Tom Hanks, is chemistry.
Saw DaVinci Code yesterday and I must say I was pleasantly surprised. The big worry I had going in was Tom Hanks performance and his ability to bring Robert Langdon to life. Unfortunately I can report Hanks gives his standard wooden performance peppered with a dash of his once strong comedic instincts. The big surprise is that the movie works despite Hanks. As I noted last week, the press critics were very negative coming out of the Cannes premiere. While I enjoy reviews that contain quotes such as, “Hanks performance makes you long for Kevin Costner,” I got to be honest and say the critics missed the boat on this one. Ron Howard hits a high note in his inconsistent career by staying true to Dan Brown’s novel. The cast, other then Hanks, all put in good performances, especially Sir Ian who trades in Gandalf’s staff for Lord Tebring’s canes. The pacing is extremely strong and the movie is over before you can even think about looking at your watch. A lot of the negative reviews have complained about all the exposition and talking in the film. Guess what, this story needs a lot of explaining, and by utilizing various visual gimmicks Howard keeps it interesting. I’m not saying this is a great film or a perfect film. There are flaws such as the lack of chemistry Hanks has with, well, anyone and a score that’s way over the top. Yet in the end, it’s the perfect summer movie because it provides the viewer with a little substance to go with a lot of flash.
2. Sometimes you can dig yourself a hole that’s so deep you can never crawl out.
Monday also brought us the series finale of Alias. A show that, as previously noted, created so many contradictory plot lines and mythologies that the viewer was often left confused and in the dark. Teasers for the finale promised answers to the Rambaldi mysteries that have carried on throughout the show. I believe the producers had every intention of clearing that up last night before they realized that they too were in the dark. After trying so many different Rambaldi “endgames” over the life of the series I think they were just as lost as the audience. The attempts made to explain things only created more questions. While leaving much of the Rambaldi stuff in the shadows, they did provide some closure though for the characters. The flashbacks were a nice way to tie everything together and the final confrontation between Jack and Sloan was great. If anything it seemed rushed as if they crammed 3 hours of show into 2.
3. If you stick your head in a shark’s mouth enough times eventually it will bite your head off, but in the mean time enjoy the experience.
Last week I criticized 24 for their lackluster season but I held out hope that we’d get a strong season finale. I was rewarded with a twisty two hours that once again gives the show an opportunity to explore new territory next season. Of course the show has a history of not following up on these opportunities so I’ll probably be back in the same disposition next year. On a side note, am I the only one who’d like to see a sitcom with Chloe and her newly introduced ex-husband? That, Tom Hanks, is chemistry.
Monday, May 22, 2006
Lazy Saturday
Before I get into today’s nuggets of wisdom I must first give credit where credit is due. First off, to my friend Kate whose own blog detailing a day off from work was an inspiration to me. Second, a tip of the hat to SNL’s Lazy Sunday film which inspired today’s title and some of my Saturday activities.
6:57AM- Woke up for first time. Made mental check to make sure it was not a weekday, closed eyes and fell back to sleep.
9:20AM- Woke up for good. Only about 7 hours of sleep, which for a Saturday seems awfully short. Grab blanket and a vitamin water and hit the couch. I’ve got 3 Netflix rentals to choose from so while deciding on that, I watch VH1’s Best Week Ever which I recorded from the night before. You know when I first heard of a weekly best of show I thought it was disgusting. Surely, we don’t need a show recapping the week in pop culture complete with humorous observations while the memories are still fresh in our minds? Considering I’m now doing roughly the same thing, I’ve obviously come around on the idea. Plus the show keeps me informed on the stuff I miss or choose to miss like American Idol.
9:50AM- Decide I’m hungry so I to heat up some leftovers from dinner the night before. Last night is the first time I’ve ever used a recipe from the back of a jar or box. Made a perogies casserole by taking the Russian potato dumplings and layering them with broccoli, red peppers, béchamel sauce and some cheese and I must admit it turned out great. Anyway, it’s almost ten so an early lunch or brunch is appropriate.
9:54AM- Enjoying leftovers and decide to pop in The Chronicles of Narnia. I read the books as a kid and fondly remember a stage production I saw at the Children’s Theater of Minneapolis and neither time do I remember noticing Christian overtones. This time I’m looking for them.
10:30AM-About 30 minutes in the disc skips and I decide to have another serving of leftovers. I usually eat one big meal a day so I guess today it will be brunch. Take the disc out and try cleaning it with my t shirt. Try playing and again it skips. How could a DVD that’s only been in circulation for a month already be this dinged up? This time I try the old Nintendo strategy of blowing into the DVD slot on my player and lo and behold it works. The movie is good so far and the kids are excellent especially the ones that play Peter and Lucy.
12:15PM- The movie finishes up and I’m really pleased. Good flick that does a nice job of balancing all the special effects with the story. Still confused about the Jesus stuff. Is the lion Jesus? On the pro side, he does sacrifice himself for his followers and then is resurrected. On the con side, I don’t remember Jesus getting shaved before he was crucified. Is the witch Jesus? On the pro side, she does seem to be powerful and can turn snow into tea which is pretty close to water turned to wine. On the con side, she is pretty evil so unless the message is, “aren’t you glad Jesus is good because look at how badass he’d be if he was evil,” I don’t think that works. Is the wardrobe Jesus? On the pro side, it does open up a new world where moral choices are black and white and only those who are true survive. On the con side, it’s an inanimate object. Color me stupid I just don’t see the overtones and usually I’m the first one to jump on that bandwagon.
12:45PM- After surfing channels and posting Saturday’s blog, I decide to watch DVD #2 from Netflix, Woody Allen’s Match Point. While not a fan per se, I’ve enjoyed some of his movies a great deal particularly Crimes and Misdemeanors. Which, by the way, is not a good first date movie especially when you’re a freshman in high school. Anyway Match Point starts out really strong, I’m loving the cast, especially Scarlet who’s stealing the show.
2:30PM- The movie ends and I’m a feeling a little down. While it’s clearly the best Allen film I’ve seen in some time, it really drags on in the last act. You know where it’s going and so does the main character but it takes an excruciating amount of time to get there. Still a thumbs up but now I’m feeling movied out. Still have Shopgirl with Steve Martin but got a feeling that’s going to be a downer too so instead decide to read conspiracy book which is always an upper. I’m still working on my book after a month which is just sad but with May sweeps on TV and the start of the summer movie season I must admit reading has taken a back seat. Still on 200 pages to go, so I give it the old college try.
3:30PM- Found a good stopping point in the book as I figure I should probably go outside of my apartment and maybe wear some clothes other then my pjs. Head out with no plan other then picking up a blackberry green tea frappuccino from Starbucks.
4:00PM- Find myself at Barnes and Noble. With DaVinci opening this weekend their Dan Brown table seems to take up half the store. I spy Holy Blood, Holy Grail which provides much of the foundation for Brown’s novel and think about rereading it. Decide against it after I remember my friend just told me he bought it a couple of days ago and I’m first in line to borrow it. End up buying the graphic novel Watchmen by Alan Moore. Somehow I’ve managed not to read what many call the definitive graphic novel of all time despite my long time involvement in the comic book world.
4:20PM- Arrive at Starbucks and to my dismay am greeted by signs for a banana crème frappuccino. I shuffle up to my favorite weekend barista with my charm turned up to a ten and ask where the green tea is? Apparently it was only a seasonal thing and now it’s all about bananas. I’m so flummoxed by the news that I order some random drink and forget to keep up my end of the customer/barista flirting dance.
4:40PM- Arrive home with what I’ve deduced is a vanilla light frappuchino that tastes neither light nor like vanilla. I grab some cookies I baked from the night before and return to the couch. Before I left I set the DVR for the Belmont to see if Barbaro can take another step towards the Triple Crown. I turn it on and am subjected to 40 minutes of human/horse interest stories. Who watches all this filler? Not me, thank god for DVR. It amazes me that the race itself is only a couple of minutes yet NBC manages to book over an hour and a half of TV time.
5:10PM- Here we go the horses are getting ready. Wow, Maryland’s state song is really bad. Come to think of it besides Indiana and Kentucky are there any other recognizable state songs?
5:15PM- Oooh that sucks for Barbaro. It’s one thing to lose but another thing for you to break your leg. Its like watching the play were Bo Jackson pulled up lame thus ending his football career only this time it’s a horse.
5:30PM- NBC just basically forced the vet to say this is a life threatening injury. Now they’re positioning their aerial cameras to spy on the goings on. Not good TV but I guess they have to try to sensationalize it now that there’s no drama going into the Preakness.
6:00PM- More reading or Shopgirl? I’ll stick to reading and turn on the Brewers/Twins game in the background. Heck let’s go for the trifecta and turn on my iPod, mute the TV, and read.
7:00PM- Turn off the iPod and turn on yet another DaVinci code special on the History Channel. This one’s about trying to find Middle Eastern DNA in the bones of a Merogovian queen. While the DaVinci code is fiction many of the facts used in the book come from confirmed research so it’s always frustrating to watch these specials that basically throw aside all the theories as junk. This one is apparently a part of a regular series called Digging for the Truth and features a massive tool as the host. He’s clearly going for the Indiana Jones vibe but comes off more like a Food Channel host. I continue reading while he babbles.
9:00PM- Finish my book, grab some more cookies and turn on The Ultimate Fighter 3 on Spike TV. I’ve found myself roped into yet another reality show. Despite my love of pro wrestling I’ve never watched much UFC but this show is pretty captivating. I don’t think I’ll run out and buy any pay per views but I do have a better appreciation for the sport and the athletes. The show has all the reality trappings; contestants on two teams, all living in the same house, etc. The only difference here is that whoever gets their arse kicked ends up going home.
10:00PM- Start reading Watchmen while watching another History Channel special, this one on the Knights Templar. Much better then the previous one and a nice companion piece to the book I just finished. Even mentioned some things I had never heard/read like the money pit in Nova Scotia. Apparently its one of the many possible Templar landing sites in North America that predate Columbus. An intricate tunnel that could lead to treasure was built in the ground and has still not been properly excavated after over three centuries of trying and various booby traps.
11:30PM- Put all books away, grab some scotch and decide to watch season finale of SNL. Saw a new Falconer skit and was tempted to pick up the phone and call some people. (You know who you are.) Overall a pretty uneven show like most of the ones this year. When did Nelly Furtado become a pop whore? It works for her; the new song with Timberland is catchy. Thought Tina Fey would get a bigger send off but given how the news has suffered in the last year I’m kind of glad to see her go on to bigger and better things.
1:00AM- All out of Scotch and nothing to watch so time to call it a day. Put on a little Damian Rice and doze off thinking of what a lazy day it’s been.
6:57AM- Woke up for first time. Made mental check to make sure it was not a weekday, closed eyes and fell back to sleep.
9:20AM- Woke up for good. Only about 7 hours of sleep, which for a Saturday seems awfully short. Grab blanket and a vitamin water and hit the couch. I’ve got 3 Netflix rentals to choose from so while deciding on that, I watch VH1’s Best Week Ever which I recorded from the night before. You know when I first heard of a weekly best of show I thought it was disgusting. Surely, we don’t need a show recapping the week in pop culture complete with humorous observations while the memories are still fresh in our minds? Considering I’m now doing roughly the same thing, I’ve obviously come around on the idea. Plus the show keeps me informed on the stuff I miss or choose to miss like American Idol.
9:50AM- Decide I’m hungry so I to heat up some leftovers from dinner the night before. Last night is the first time I’ve ever used a recipe from the back of a jar or box. Made a perogies casserole by taking the Russian potato dumplings and layering them with broccoli, red peppers, béchamel sauce and some cheese and I must admit it turned out great. Anyway, it’s almost ten so an early lunch or brunch is appropriate.
9:54AM- Enjoying leftovers and decide to pop in The Chronicles of Narnia. I read the books as a kid and fondly remember a stage production I saw at the Children’s Theater of Minneapolis and neither time do I remember noticing Christian overtones. This time I’m looking for them.
10:30AM-About 30 minutes in the disc skips and I decide to have another serving of leftovers. I usually eat one big meal a day so I guess today it will be brunch. Take the disc out and try cleaning it with my t shirt. Try playing and again it skips. How could a DVD that’s only been in circulation for a month already be this dinged up? This time I try the old Nintendo strategy of blowing into the DVD slot on my player and lo and behold it works. The movie is good so far and the kids are excellent especially the ones that play Peter and Lucy.
12:15PM- The movie finishes up and I’m really pleased. Good flick that does a nice job of balancing all the special effects with the story. Still confused about the Jesus stuff. Is the lion Jesus? On the pro side, he does sacrifice himself for his followers and then is resurrected. On the con side, I don’t remember Jesus getting shaved before he was crucified. Is the witch Jesus? On the pro side, she does seem to be powerful and can turn snow into tea which is pretty close to water turned to wine. On the con side, she is pretty evil so unless the message is, “aren’t you glad Jesus is good because look at how badass he’d be if he was evil,” I don’t think that works. Is the wardrobe Jesus? On the pro side, it does open up a new world where moral choices are black and white and only those who are true survive. On the con side, it’s an inanimate object. Color me stupid I just don’t see the overtones and usually I’m the first one to jump on that bandwagon.
12:45PM- After surfing channels and posting Saturday’s blog, I decide to watch DVD #2 from Netflix, Woody Allen’s Match Point. While not a fan per se, I’ve enjoyed some of his movies a great deal particularly Crimes and Misdemeanors. Which, by the way, is not a good first date movie especially when you’re a freshman in high school. Anyway Match Point starts out really strong, I’m loving the cast, especially Scarlet who’s stealing the show.
2:30PM- The movie ends and I’m a feeling a little down. While it’s clearly the best Allen film I’ve seen in some time, it really drags on in the last act. You know where it’s going and so does the main character but it takes an excruciating amount of time to get there. Still a thumbs up but now I’m feeling movied out. Still have Shopgirl with Steve Martin but got a feeling that’s going to be a downer too so instead decide to read conspiracy book which is always an upper. I’m still working on my book after a month which is just sad but with May sweeps on TV and the start of the summer movie season I must admit reading has taken a back seat. Still on 200 pages to go, so I give it the old college try.
3:30PM- Found a good stopping point in the book as I figure I should probably go outside of my apartment and maybe wear some clothes other then my pjs. Head out with no plan other then picking up a blackberry green tea frappuccino from Starbucks.
4:00PM- Find myself at Barnes and Noble. With DaVinci opening this weekend their Dan Brown table seems to take up half the store. I spy Holy Blood, Holy Grail which provides much of the foundation for Brown’s novel and think about rereading it. Decide against it after I remember my friend just told me he bought it a couple of days ago and I’m first in line to borrow it. End up buying the graphic novel Watchmen by Alan Moore. Somehow I’ve managed not to read what many call the definitive graphic novel of all time despite my long time involvement in the comic book world.
4:20PM- Arrive at Starbucks and to my dismay am greeted by signs for a banana crème frappuccino. I shuffle up to my favorite weekend barista with my charm turned up to a ten and ask where the green tea is? Apparently it was only a seasonal thing and now it’s all about bananas. I’m so flummoxed by the news that I order some random drink and forget to keep up my end of the customer/barista flirting dance.
4:40PM- Arrive home with what I’ve deduced is a vanilla light frappuchino that tastes neither light nor like vanilla. I grab some cookies I baked from the night before and return to the couch. Before I left I set the DVR for the Belmont to see if Barbaro can take another step towards the Triple Crown. I turn it on and am subjected to 40 minutes of human/horse interest stories. Who watches all this filler? Not me, thank god for DVR. It amazes me that the race itself is only a couple of minutes yet NBC manages to book over an hour and a half of TV time.
5:10PM- Here we go the horses are getting ready. Wow, Maryland’s state song is really bad. Come to think of it besides Indiana and Kentucky are there any other recognizable state songs?
5:15PM- Oooh that sucks for Barbaro. It’s one thing to lose but another thing for you to break your leg. Its like watching the play were Bo Jackson pulled up lame thus ending his football career only this time it’s a horse.
5:30PM- NBC just basically forced the vet to say this is a life threatening injury. Now they’re positioning their aerial cameras to spy on the goings on. Not good TV but I guess they have to try to sensationalize it now that there’s no drama going into the Preakness.
6:00PM- More reading or Shopgirl? I’ll stick to reading and turn on the Brewers/Twins game in the background. Heck let’s go for the trifecta and turn on my iPod, mute the TV, and read.
7:00PM- Turn off the iPod and turn on yet another DaVinci code special on the History Channel. This one’s about trying to find Middle Eastern DNA in the bones of a Merogovian queen. While the DaVinci code is fiction many of the facts used in the book come from confirmed research so it’s always frustrating to watch these specials that basically throw aside all the theories as junk. This one is apparently a part of a regular series called Digging for the Truth and features a massive tool as the host. He’s clearly going for the Indiana Jones vibe but comes off more like a Food Channel host. I continue reading while he babbles.
9:00PM- Finish my book, grab some more cookies and turn on The Ultimate Fighter 3 on Spike TV. I’ve found myself roped into yet another reality show. Despite my love of pro wrestling I’ve never watched much UFC but this show is pretty captivating. I don’t think I’ll run out and buy any pay per views but I do have a better appreciation for the sport and the athletes. The show has all the reality trappings; contestants on two teams, all living in the same house, etc. The only difference here is that whoever gets their arse kicked ends up going home.
10:00PM- Start reading Watchmen while watching another History Channel special, this one on the Knights Templar. Much better then the previous one and a nice companion piece to the book I just finished. Even mentioned some things I had never heard/read like the money pit in Nova Scotia. Apparently its one of the many possible Templar landing sites in North America that predate Columbus. An intricate tunnel that could lead to treasure was built in the ground and has still not been properly excavated after over three centuries of trying and various booby traps.
11:30PM- Put all books away, grab some scotch and decide to watch season finale of SNL. Saw a new Falconer skit and was tempted to pick up the phone and call some people. (You know who you are.) Overall a pretty uneven show like most of the ones this year. When did Nelly Furtado become a pop whore? It works for her; the new song with Timberland is catchy. Thought Tina Fey would get a bigger send off but given how the news has suffered in the last year I’m kind of glad to see her go on to bigger and better things.
1:00AM- All out of Scotch and nothing to watch so time to call it a day. Put on a little Damian Rice and doze off thinking of what a lazy day it’s been.
Saturday, May 20, 2006
The Point Game
-4: The West Wing- After the last show I kind of wish Alan Alda had won. Don’t even bring Rob Lowe back if you’re not going to allow him to interact with the other characters he shared the screen with for four years. Also, if you’re going to open your final season with a flash forward you need to finish your season with a flash forward. Very disheartening to see all the positive momentum the show had regained in its final season go to waste.
+2: The O.C. - I’ve been one of the few people on the bandwagon this year but I think the season finale proved my point that The O.C. is back…bitches. Killing off a major character who has become annoying to both the audience and the other characters takes the kind of ingenuity usually reserved for shows like Lost. The fact that creator Josh Schwartz is coming back full time next season hopefully means we can expect even better.
-2: The NBA- Message to the NBA, if you want people to start tuning in to your low rated playoff games start scheduling them with some consistency. Last night the LA Clippers forced a game 7 in their series with Phoenix Suns. As much as the league has dwelled in the land of negativity for the last few years this sounds like a game that might actually be entertaining. So if game 6 was on Thursday you’d expect a day off and then game 7 is on Saturday, correct? Wrong. Well then it must be on Sunday right? Nope, the NBA has scheduled it for Monday which makes about as much sense as having teams play back to back days. Oh wait, the NBA already did that to New Jersey and Indiana in the first round. If you’re going to make your playoffs last 4 months at least try to keep the schedule consistent.
-1: USA Today- Last week USA Today actually broke a relevant news story with new details on the NSA wire tapping program. While I respect them for acting like a real newspaper I’ve got to deduct a point for acting out of character. When I read the USA Today, I expect colorful charts and generic stories on America’s love affair with the hamburger. Stick to what you do best and leave the real reporting to the Times and Posts of the world.
-2: Sony Pictures- In one of the more idiotic moves in marketing history, the studio banned internet reviewers from the press screenings of The DaVinci Code this week. The only thing worse than an internet scribe railing against your movie, is an internet scribe railing against your movie that hasn’t even seen it. The negative buzz is out there anyway as most of the “legitimate” press has been panning the movie. I’m sure it will still do a huge opening, as throngs of people including myself head to the theater, but this kind of pub can lead to huge 2nd week drop offs.
+2: The O.C. - I’ve been one of the few people on the bandwagon this year but I think the season finale proved my point that The O.C. is back…bitches. Killing off a major character who has become annoying to both the audience and the other characters takes the kind of ingenuity usually reserved for shows like Lost. The fact that creator Josh Schwartz is coming back full time next season hopefully means we can expect even better.
-2: The NBA- Message to the NBA, if you want people to start tuning in to your low rated playoff games start scheduling them with some consistency. Last night the LA Clippers forced a game 7 in their series with Phoenix Suns. As much as the league has dwelled in the land of negativity for the last few years this sounds like a game that might actually be entertaining. So if game 6 was on Thursday you’d expect a day off and then game 7 is on Saturday, correct? Wrong. Well then it must be on Sunday right? Nope, the NBA has scheduled it for Monday which makes about as much sense as having teams play back to back days. Oh wait, the NBA already did that to New Jersey and Indiana in the first round. If you’re going to make your playoffs last 4 months at least try to keep the schedule consistent.
-1: USA Today- Last week USA Today actually broke a relevant news story with new details on the NSA wire tapping program. While I respect them for acting like a real newspaper I’ve got to deduct a point for acting out of character. When I read the USA Today, I expect colorful charts and generic stories on America’s love affair with the hamburger. Stick to what you do best and leave the real reporting to the Times and Posts of the world.
-2: Sony Pictures- In one of the more idiotic moves in marketing history, the studio banned internet reviewers from the press screenings of The DaVinci Code this week. The only thing worse than an internet scribe railing against your movie, is an internet scribe railing against your movie that hasn’t even seen it. The negative buzz is out there anyway as most of the “legitimate” press has been panning the movie. I’m sure it will still do a huge opening, as throngs of people including myself head to the theater, but this kind of pub can lead to huge 2nd week drop offs.
Friday, May 19, 2006
What I’m…
…Saying Goodbye To In a Polite Fashion
Will & Grace and That 70’s Show- Here are two examples of long running shows that have carried on well past their prime. Once an avid viewer of both, I’ve now only stopped to watch here and there because I know they’re coming to an end. Will & Grace overdosed on guest stars for the sake of guest stars, while That 70’s Show unwisely continued even after two of its stars left in the same season. That being said I sat down last night and watched both series’ finales.
I thought That 70’s Show went out with a whimper. Sure they had old cast members Topher Grace and Ashton Kutcher come back but for the most part the show felt as tired as its premise. The scene with Mother Foreman addressing the entire cast was nice but overall it was an unremarkable finale.
Will & Grace surprised the hell out of me with one of the better series finales I’ve ever seen. From Grace’s opening dream sequence to the final scene at the bar this episode hit all the right notes. By flashing forward in time the writers gave fans something shows rarely do, and that’s a realistic view into the future with real closure. Even the stunt casting of Kevin Bacon was forgivable because it had context and was a dream sequence. Of course Jack and Karen stole the show as always, from their self referential line about being “supporting characters on the Will and Grace Show”, to their duet of Nat King Cole’s Unforgettable. The show even threw a bone to those fans in gay denial that always wished for a romantic relationship for Will & Grace. It was truly a great finale and one that caught me completely off guard.
…Buying.
Scrubs Season 3 on DVD- This is the season that sold me on Scrubs. I had caught a few episodes early in its run but was by no means a religious viewer. Season 3 changed that as the show further embraced the blurry line between fantasy and reality. The season also features great guest stars including an amazing 2 episode stint by Michael J Fox as a doctor with OCD and Tara Reid bringing a little bit of taradise to JD’s life.
…Listening To
Top 5 on My iPod
1. Crazy- Gnarls Barkley (The duo of Danger Mouse and Cee-Lo are giving us the first anthem of the summer. The smooth R&B mixed with the blistering beats would make Andre’ 3000 jealous.)
2. Gone Daddy Gone- Gnarls Barkley (I used to think that the Violent Femmes were one of those bands whose songs should never be covered, consider me corrected.)
3. Follow Through- Gavin DeGraw (Not usually my style but a great cinematic song featured in the penultimate episode of season 3 of Scrubs that just stuck in my head.)
4. Now is the Time- Damone (Damn you iTunes for your clever marketing. After downloading a song for free I went back and checked out the rest of their catalogue and found this track that quite simply rocks.)
5. Eye Opener- The Cardinal Sin (The opening track to their new album, “Hurry Up and Wait”, crackles with pop punk catchability ((new word)) and is a great introduction to an album that’s in heavy rotation for me.)
Will & Grace and That 70’s Show- Here are two examples of long running shows that have carried on well past their prime. Once an avid viewer of both, I’ve now only stopped to watch here and there because I know they’re coming to an end. Will & Grace overdosed on guest stars for the sake of guest stars, while That 70’s Show unwisely continued even after two of its stars left in the same season. That being said I sat down last night and watched both series’ finales.
I thought That 70’s Show went out with a whimper. Sure they had old cast members Topher Grace and Ashton Kutcher come back but for the most part the show felt as tired as its premise. The scene with Mother Foreman addressing the entire cast was nice but overall it was an unremarkable finale.
Will & Grace surprised the hell out of me with one of the better series finales I’ve ever seen. From Grace’s opening dream sequence to the final scene at the bar this episode hit all the right notes. By flashing forward in time the writers gave fans something shows rarely do, and that’s a realistic view into the future with real closure. Even the stunt casting of Kevin Bacon was forgivable because it had context and was a dream sequence. Of course Jack and Karen stole the show as always, from their self referential line about being “supporting characters on the Will and Grace Show”, to their duet of Nat King Cole’s Unforgettable. The show even threw a bone to those fans in gay denial that always wished for a romantic relationship for Will & Grace. It was truly a great finale and one that caught me completely off guard.
…Buying.
Scrubs Season 3 on DVD- This is the season that sold me on Scrubs. I had caught a few episodes early in its run but was by no means a religious viewer. Season 3 changed that as the show further embraced the blurry line between fantasy and reality. The season also features great guest stars including an amazing 2 episode stint by Michael J Fox as a doctor with OCD and Tara Reid bringing a little bit of taradise to JD’s life.
…Listening To
Top 5 on My iPod
1. Crazy- Gnarls Barkley (The duo of Danger Mouse and Cee-Lo are giving us the first anthem of the summer. The smooth R&B mixed with the blistering beats would make Andre’ 3000 jealous.)
2. Gone Daddy Gone- Gnarls Barkley (I used to think that the Violent Femmes were one of those bands whose songs should never be covered, consider me corrected.)
3. Follow Through- Gavin DeGraw (Not usually my style but a great cinematic song featured in the penultimate episode of season 3 of Scrubs that just stuck in my head.)
4. Now is the Time- Damone (Damn you iTunes for your clever marketing. After downloading a song for free I went back and checked out the rest of their catalogue and found this track that quite simply rocks.)
5. Eye Opener- The Cardinal Sin (The opening track to their new album, “Hurry Up and Wait”, crackles with pop punk catchability ((new word)) and is a great introduction to an album that’s in heavy rotation for me.)
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Thou Shall Not Worship False Idols
I like to think of myself as hip, even though the first sign of being unhip is thinking you are. I’ve got my finger on the pulse of all the hot shows, music, and movies for better or for worse. I’ll even suffer through a movie, song, or episode of something, if I think it might get better or grow on me. Over the years I’ve watched episodes of The Simple Life, bought tickets to Hannibal, and downloaded songs by Brittney. Why am I admitting all this? I just want to make it clear that I try to give all pop culture phenomenons a chance before I pass judgment. With that said I must say that after all these years, I still don’t get American Idol.
There are certain reality shows that hit a sweet spot in the American psyche and blow up. Most of these shows are around for a season or two and then fade away (or should fade away, Apprentice). I would have put money that Idol would have been one of those shows. Instead it’s consistently the number 1 rated show on TV. The judges have become faux celebrities and some contestants that don’t make it past the first auditions even end up with 15 minutes of fame. The scary thing is that Idol seems to growing in its popularity and shows no signs of slowing down.
I watched about two episodes the first season and have not watched more then 5 minutes since. The appeal of the show eludes me. Take the judges for example. I don’t understand how a no name pop producer like Simon Cowell has become the last word on talent or how a train wreck of a person like Paula Abdul can keep a steady job, and to this day I still don’t know who the fuck Randy Jackson is and why he’s on TV. I understand how the auditions can be funny when you have people coming in that can’t sing, but come on people how many times can you watch some nerdy kid ruin a Shakira song. The competition itself seems to be a joke. I read more articles on the various conspiracy plots that come up every season then I do about the actual winners. And don’t get me started on the whole, “let the viewers vote” angle. In an age where you can’t trust the public to elect a competent President how can you expect them to pick the “best” singer?
Again I’m not saying this show wasn’t a stroke of brilliance. I’m clearly in the minority of people who don’t get it, just like I’m in the minority when it comes to “Two and a Half Men” or “CSI”. So enjoy your season finale, cheer for your singer, boo Simon, pity Seacrest, and if you have a chance, please explain to me why on earth this show still captivates your attention.
There are certain reality shows that hit a sweet spot in the American psyche and blow up. Most of these shows are around for a season or two and then fade away (or should fade away, Apprentice). I would have put money that Idol would have been one of those shows. Instead it’s consistently the number 1 rated show on TV. The judges have become faux celebrities and some contestants that don’t make it past the first auditions even end up with 15 minutes of fame. The scary thing is that Idol seems to growing in its popularity and shows no signs of slowing down.
I watched about two episodes the first season and have not watched more then 5 minutes since. The appeal of the show eludes me. Take the judges for example. I don’t understand how a no name pop producer like Simon Cowell has become the last word on talent or how a train wreck of a person like Paula Abdul can keep a steady job, and to this day I still don’t know who the fuck Randy Jackson is and why he’s on TV. I understand how the auditions can be funny when you have people coming in that can’t sing, but come on people how many times can you watch some nerdy kid ruin a Shakira song. The competition itself seems to be a joke. I read more articles on the various conspiracy plots that come up every season then I do about the actual winners. And don’t get me started on the whole, “let the viewers vote” angle. In an age where you can’t trust the public to elect a competent President how can you expect them to pick the “best” singer?
Again I’m not saying this show wasn’t a stroke of brilliance. I’m clearly in the minority of people who don’t get it, just like I’m in the minority when it comes to “Two and a Half Men” or “CSI”. So enjoy your season finale, cheer for your singer, boo Simon, pity Seacrest, and if you have a chance, please explain to me why on earth this show still captivates your attention.
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
Has 24 jumped the clock?
Bee boop…bee boop…bee boop….bee boop.
There was a time when that noise meant it was time to wake the brain for another installment of 24. In its 4+ seasons, 24 has challenged its audience with intricate plots and a dense mythology. When the 5th season began this January I praised the first few episodes as perhaps the best start of a season ever. The show dared to kill off a number of regulars and immediately set us on the familiar Jack against the world path. Four months later I can honestly say that 24 has lost its way. What’s gone wrong?
No Follow Up
Last year 24 ended with a rather humorous shot that reminded many of the old Bill Bixby Hulk show. Jack walked alone as he went out to create a new life for himself. The decision to bring Jack back to CTU right away was probably the first mistake. Having Jack in a soldier of fortune type role could have made for some good early season stuff and then you could have him drawn back in to his old role. Also, ever since Jack came back to CTU in hour 3, his reemergence and the ramifications to the Chinese situation from last year have not been dealt with.
Sloooooooooow Plot Development
Your average 24 episode is made up of people talking, then driving, then shouting, then shooting. The key to keeping this formula fresh is what comes next. This season Jack spent 4 hours chasing the tape recording that proved the President was the big bad of the season. Instead of getting to the end of one chase scene and finding a clue or a plot development like past seasons, this series of chase scenes simply ended with one person getting away only for the chase to continue. At one point you were cheering for the bad guys to just destroy the tape and end it. I think the writing staff must have thought they worked for a show called 16 because the amount of filler this year is monumental.
Enough with CTU
Are you as bored with the intergovernmental politics that run this place as I am? This year we had three attempted takeovers of CTU, one by the Fat Hobbit, one by the terrorists, and one by Homeland Security. While I love the fact that our government is accurately portrayed as incompetent, how many times can CTU themselves be the victim of a terrorist attack? It’s time to cut Jack loose from this bureaucratic bunch. I’ve never understood this “division” that the higher ups refer to, but maybe Jack could work for them or maybe he could take Sydney’s job at APO.
Kim Returns Onscreen
Unless she’s bringing the cougar, I don’t want to see it.
Hurried Finale
I’m taking a few leaps here because I’ve obviously not seen the last 2 hours but after Monday’s show I think we’re in for a rough night. In the 3rd to last hour we were introduced to 3 new plot threads that now must be tied up in the final night. Jack’s still got to stop the terrorists (who’ve gone from chemical to nuclear), catch the President, kill Miles and have time to discover his romantic feelings for Chloe.
I’ll still watch the finale of course, hoping it will renew my faith and maybe even set up storylines for next year that will actually be followed up on. Yet I’m still a little shaky due to the fact that a 24 movie in the pipeline and that brings back memories of when X Files began to decline. Of course Mulder and Scully didn't have a Jack Sack to get them out of tight spots.
Bee boop…bee boop…bee boop….bee boop.
There was a time when that noise meant it was time to wake the brain for another installment of 24. In its 4+ seasons, 24 has challenged its audience with intricate plots and a dense mythology. When the 5th season began this January I praised the first few episodes as perhaps the best start of a season ever. The show dared to kill off a number of regulars and immediately set us on the familiar Jack against the world path. Four months later I can honestly say that 24 has lost its way. What’s gone wrong?
No Follow Up
Last year 24 ended with a rather humorous shot that reminded many of the old Bill Bixby Hulk show. Jack walked alone as he went out to create a new life for himself. The decision to bring Jack back to CTU right away was probably the first mistake. Having Jack in a soldier of fortune type role could have made for some good early season stuff and then you could have him drawn back in to his old role. Also, ever since Jack came back to CTU in hour 3, his reemergence and the ramifications to the Chinese situation from last year have not been dealt with.
Sloooooooooow Plot Development
Your average 24 episode is made up of people talking, then driving, then shouting, then shooting. The key to keeping this formula fresh is what comes next. This season Jack spent 4 hours chasing the tape recording that proved the President was the big bad of the season. Instead of getting to the end of one chase scene and finding a clue or a plot development like past seasons, this series of chase scenes simply ended with one person getting away only for the chase to continue. At one point you were cheering for the bad guys to just destroy the tape and end it. I think the writing staff must have thought they worked for a show called 16 because the amount of filler this year is monumental.
Enough with CTU
Are you as bored with the intergovernmental politics that run this place as I am? This year we had three attempted takeovers of CTU, one by the Fat Hobbit, one by the terrorists, and one by Homeland Security. While I love the fact that our government is accurately portrayed as incompetent, how many times can CTU themselves be the victim of a terrorist attack? It’s time to cut Jack loose from this bureaucratic bunch. I’ve never understood this “division” that the higher ups refer to, but maybe Jack could work for them or maybe he could take Sydney’s job at APO.
Kim Returns Onscreen
Unless she’s bringing the cougar, I don’t want to see it.
Hurried Finale
I’m taking a few leaps here because I’ve obviously not seen the last 2 hours but after Monday’s show I think we’re in for a rough night. In the 3rd to last hour we were introduced to 3 new plot threads that now must be tied up in the final night. Jack’s still got to stop the terrorists (who’ve gone from chemical to nuclear), catch the President, kill Miles and have time to discover his romantic feelings for Chloe.
I’ll still watch the finale of course, hoping it will renew my faith and maybe even set up storylines for next year that will actually be followed up on. Yet I’m still a little shaky due to the fact that a 24 movie in the pipeline and that brings back memories of when X Files began to decline. Of course Mulder and Scully didn't have a Jack Sack to get them out of tight spots.
Bee boop…bee boop…bee boop….bee boop.
Monday, May 15, 2006
The Great Mirage of 2008
If you watch the Sunday morning news shows you’ve seen the face of Senator Russ Feingold (D-Wisconsin) popping up all over the place. He’s calling for W’s impeachment, he’s calling for troop pullout, he’s continuing to call for campaign finance reform, in short he’s calling for a return to a strong Democratic party. Besides getting out the message and helping with the mid term elections, many analysts are pointing towards a run at the 2008 nomination as a reason behind Feingold’s new visibility. Now as a self confessed liberal and a self confessed cynic this puts me in a tough spot.
Feingold is a bright star in the party and has been since he came to Washington. Shortly after I moved to Wisconsin I watched Feingold win his first term. Now coming from Minnesota where we had one of the greatest liberal minds of all time, Paul Wellstone, serving in the Senate, I immediately gravitated towards Feingold. Over time I’ve become a huge follower of his. The problem is I already see the writing on the wall, and it says “don’t get excited because in the end the media and the party will turn Feingold into a younger better looking Dennis Kucinich.”
Our supposed left leaning media is no friend to liberals. A big reason for this has been the continued use of the word “liberal” in a negative light. Some might blame the Republicans for this but the fact is Reagan used it a few times in a negative context and the media picked up the ball and ran with it. Liberal is now equated with extreme. Somehow “conservative” has escaped the same fate. When and if Feingold announces a run at ‘08 I imagine we’ll hear it announced by CNN as, “Liberal Senator Russ Feingold of Wisconsin announced his candidacy for the Democratic nomination.” That will be the first nail in the coffin.
The main culprit in derailing any realistic chance Feingold has will come from his own party. The Democratic Party has been a lame duck party for the last 6 years. Even before Al Gore won the 2000 election (yes I said won, I’ll never let that go) the party was well on its way to a centralist agenda. No one has realized that moderation will never win elections because the Republicans simply do it better. Clinton was an exception only because he ran against weak opponents and quite frankly, the man was a charmer. Yes Howard Dean is the head of DCCC but he’s simply a figure head used for fund raising. The core of the party leadership still believes the only way to reclaim the White House and Congress is to mildly disagree with the current administration and betray the values the party was built on like equality, responsible foreign policy, and a commitment to education and social issues. Just look at who the DCCC is pushing on the media as possible ‘08 candidates, a gaggle of inbred southerners, a cardboard cutout of John Kerry (same as the real thing), and worst of all, Hilary Clinton version 2.0 who now reminds me more of Condi Rice then the Hilary we all loved back in the 90’s.
I’d love to dream about a Feingold/ John Edwards ticket in ‘08 but it’s just a dream. It’ll be great to see him debate and stir stuff up but in the end we all know what’s coming, another candidate that will talk out of both sides of his mouth that mismanages the election causing him to lose. Of course there’s still the possibility that W will declare himself Emperor for life and this will all be moot.
Feingold is a bright star in the party and has been since he came to Washington. Shortly after I moved to Wisconsin I watched Feingold win his first term. Now coming from Minnesota where we had one of the greatest liberal minds of all time, Paul Wellstone, serving in the Senate, I immediately gravitated towards Feingold. Over time I’ve become a huge follower of his. The problem is I already see the writing on the wall, and it says “don’t get excited because in the end the media and the party will turn Feingold into a younger better looking Dennis Kucinich.”
Our supposed left leaning media is no friend to liberals. A big reason for this has been the continued use of the word “liberal” in a negative light. Some might blame the Republicans for this but the fact is Reagan used it a few times in a negative context and the media picked up the ball and ran with it. Liberal is now equated with extreme. Somehow “conservative” has escaped the same fate. When and if Feingold announces a run at ‘08 I imagine we’ll hear it announced by CNN as, “Liberal Senator Russ Feingold of Wisconsin announced his candidacy for the Democratic nomination.” That will be the first nail in the coffin.
The main culprit in derailing any realistic chance Feingold has will come from his own party. The Democratic Party has been a lame duck party for the last 6 years. Even before Al Gore won the 2000 election (yes I said won, I’ll never let that go) the party was well on its way to a centralist agenda. No one has realized that moderation will never win elections because the Republicans simply do it better. Clinton was an exception only because he ran against weak opponents and quite frankly, the man was a charmer. Yes Howard Dean is the head of DCCC but he’s simply a figure head used for fund raising. The core of the party leadership still believes the only way to reclaim the White House and Congress is to mildly disagree with the current administration and betray the values the party was built on like equality, responsible foreign policy, and a commitment to education and social issues. Just look at who the DCCC is pushing on the media as possible ‘08 candidates, a gaggle of inbred southerners, a cardboard cutout of John Kerry (same as the real thing), and worst of all, Hilary Clinton version 2.0 who now reminds me more of Condi Rice then the Hilary we all loved back in the 90’s.
I’d love to dream about a Feingold/ John Edwards ticket in ‘08 but it’s just a dream. It’ll be great to see him debate and stir stuff up but in the end we all know what’s coming, another candidate that will talk out of both sides of his mouth that mismanages the election causing him to lose. Of course there’s still the possibility that W will declare himself Emperor for life and this will all be moot.
Sunday, May 14, 2006
Survivor Sunday
It's time for that Sunday that comes only once (or twice) a year when you get together with friends, order a pizza, yell at the TV, and make ridiculous side bets. No it's not Super Bowl Sunday, it's the season finale of Survivor. As we close out another season of the grand dame of reality I thought we'd take a look at the show and how it still manages to stay fresh.
The Cast
Survivor has still managed to put together a wide range of cast members even after umpteen seasons. Many reality shows have taken to casting only beautiful people when putting together a season (Real World I'm looking at you). They also haven't resorted to the "token" form of reality casting. This season we got two whole teams of older contestants while most shows will just have one or two (see The Amazing Race).
Gimmicks That Work
A lot of shows that have been around for awhile feel the need to add something new to the formula. Survivor is no different but they have a stellar track record of choosing ones that actually make sense for the program. This year the introduction of Exile Island added a new level of intrigue. Sure Terry found the hidden immunity idol relatively quickly, but the intrigue of when and if he'd use it opened up new avenues we've not seen on the show.
Probst
If you had told me when Survivor started that I'd still find Jeff Probst as a positive aspect of the show I would have checked you into St. Mary's Home for the Loony. Happily you would have been right. Probst gets it. He's a host that's not trying to be the star (see Seacrest, Ryan for the opposite). The tribal councils are still entertaining largely due to the fact that Probst has fine tuned the art of stirring shit up. I've read that the 3 minutes we see every week are edited down from hour long tribal bitch fests but damn Probst knows how to get the cast to say what we want to hear.
The Game
After 12 seasons the game still holds surprises. Last year we got to see one tribe lose all but one immunity challenge. This season we actually saw an alliance formed pre merge stay strong after the merge except for the fact that we also saw Terry win more individual immunity challenges then anyone in Survivor history. Most importantly we can still sit on our couch and watch awestruck as the game takes inexplicable turns. I mean is it just me or could Terry and Aras have run this game to the final two? How did Terry's tribe fail to win challenge after challenge against the disfunction of Team Shane and Courtney? You always think you know how things are going to play out but they rarely follow form.
So as I get ready for the finale I'm going to forgive the producers for going the cheap route with Thursday night's non ending and get ready for some classic Survivor. I'd love to see Terry win but the odds seem stacked against him but then again they have been all year. At the very least he and Shane have probably secured a spot on the next All Star edition.
The Cast
Survivor has still managed to put together a wide range of cast members even after umpteen seasons. Many reality shows have taken to casting only beautiful people when putting together a season (Real World I'm looking at you). They also haven't resorted to the "token" form of reality casting. This season we got two whole teams of older contestants while most shows will just have one or two (see The Amazing Race).
Gimmicks That Work
A lot of shows that have been around for awhile feel the need to add something new to the formula. Survivor is no different but they have a stellar track record of choosing ones that actually make sense for the program. This year the introduction of Exile Island added a new level of intrigue. Sure Terry found the hidden immunity idol relatively quickly, but the intrigue of when and if he'd use it opened up new avenues we've not seen on the show.
Probst
If you had told me when Survivor started that I'd still find Jeff Probst as a positive aspect of the show I would have checked you into St. Mary's Home for the Loony. Happily you would have been right. Probst gets it. He's a host that's not trying to be the star (see Seacrest, Ryan for the opposite). The tribal councils are still entertaining largely due to the fact that Probst has fine tuned the art of stirring shit up. I've read that the 3 minutes we see every week are edited down from hour long tribal bitch fests but damn Probst knows how to get the cast to say what we want to hear.
The Game
After 12 seasons the game still holds surprises. Last year we got to see one tribe lose all but one immunity challenge. This season we actually saw an alliance formed pre merge stay strong after the merge except for the fact that we also saw Terry win more individual immunity challenges then anyone in Survivor history. Most importantly we can still sit on our couch and watch awestruck as the game takes inexplicable turns. I mean is it just me or could Terry and Aras have run this game to the final two? How did Terry's tribe fail to win challenge after challenge against the disfunction of Team Shane and Courtney? You always think you know how things are going to play out but they rarely follow form.
So as I get ready for the finale I'm going to forgive the producers for going the cheap route with Thursday night's non ending and get ready for some classic Survivor. I'd love to see Terry win but the odds seem stacked against him but then again they have been all year. At the very least he and Shane have probably secured a spot on the next All Star edition.
Friday, May 12, 2006
What I’m…
…Sitting In a Theater For- Mission Impossible: 3
It’s always nice when a film actually exceeds expectations. The third Mission installment (I still refuse to call it M:I:III) is not only superior to the first two but also makes up for the disappointment of 1 and 2. As a fan of director JJ Abrams' TV shows I must say this is an impressive film debut. He also managed to work his shows into the film by casting Felicity as a kick ass agent (who knew she had that in her), Weiss from Alias in a brief wisecracking role (what else is new), and a special thank you to the Hanso Foundation (if you don’t know, keep reading).
…Surfing- www.thehansofoundation.org
Anyone notice the Hanso ads that have aired during the last commercial breaks of Lost the past two weeks? I missed them on first airing thanks to magic of DVR, but after reading about the ad I went back and watched. What they reveal is a phone/web game that reveals very broad hints about the nature of Lost and the mysterious Hanso Foundation. To get started call 1 877 426 7674, visit www.sublymonal.com or if you’re lazy check out www.thelostexperience.com for a list of hints and cheats.
…Praying For- Veronica Mars Renewal
Season 2 just wrapped on V Mars and her rag tag bunch of hooligans, and already they’ve started next season’s big mystery; will they be renewed? When The WB and UPN announced their merger into The CW network, pundits were breathless with the idea of a Tuesday night block of Gilmore Girls and Mars. At the time it seemed like a sure thing with DVD sales of the first season going strong and growing critical praise. Then the kids at Neptune High got thrown up against Idol and Lost and the ratings plummeted. A recent move back to Tuesday nights helped some but left a once clear outlook slightly muddled. What’s not muddled is the quality of said show. This week’s finale provided resolution to season long story lines, answered lingering questions and set up a storyline or two for next year. It was a perfect example of how you can wrap up a season in one hour which is something a lot shows seem to have lost the ability to do. If you’re still not watching this show pick up the 1st season on DVD (the price was just lowered) and start watching season 2 reruns this summer.
…Renting- The Ice Harvest
A highly overlooked film from this winter that builds up Billy Bob Thornton’s anti-Christmas resume. Connie Nielsen smolders, John Cusack charms and Oliver Platt falls down. A piece of modern noir from the unlikely eye of director Harold Ramis.
It’s always nice when a film actually exceeds expectations. The third Mission installment (I still refuse to call it M:I:III) is not only superior to the first two but also makes up for the disappointment of 1 and 2. As a fan of director JJ Abrams' TV shows I must say this is an impressive film debut. He also managed to work his shows into the film by casting Felicity as a kick ass agent (who knew she had that in her), Weiss from Alias in a brief wisecracking role (what else is new), and a special thank you to the Hanso Foundation (if you don’t know, keep reading).
…Surfing- www.thehansofoundation.org
Anyone notice the Hanso ads that have aired during the last commercial breaks of Lost the past two weeks? I missed them on first airing thanks to magic of DVR, but after reading about the ad I went back and watched. What they reveal is a phone/web game that reveals very broad hints about the nature of Lost and the mysterious Hanso Foundation. To get started call 1 877 426 7674, visit www.sublymonal.com or if you’re lazy check out www.thelostexperience.com for a list of hints and cheats.
…Praying For- Veronica Mars Renewal
Season 2 just wrapped on V Mars and her rag tag bunch of hooligans, and already they’ve started next season’s big mystery; will they be renewed? When The WB and UPN announced their merger into The CW network, pundits were breathless with the idea of a Tuesday night block of Gilmore Girls and Mars. At the time it seemed like a sure thing with DVD sales of the first season going strong and growing critical praise. Then the kids at Neptune High got thrown up against Idol and Lost and the ratings plummeted. A recent move back to Tuesday nights helped some but left a once clear outlook slightly muddled. What’s not muddled is the quality of said show. This week’s finale provided resolution to season long story lines, answered lingering questions and set up a storyline or two for next year. It was a perfect example of how you can wrap up a season in one hour which is something a lot shows seem to have lost the ability to do. If you’re still not watching this show pick up the 1st season on DVD (the price was just lowered) and start watching season 2 reruns this summer.
…Renting- The Ice Harvest
A highly overlooked film from this winter that builds up Billy Bob Thornton’s anti-Christmas resume. Connie Nielsen smolders, John Cusack charms and Oliver Platt falls down. A piece of modern noir from the unlikely eye of director Harold Ramis.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Pot Meet Kettle
You know you’re getting older when you begin to question something in our culture and your inner voice uses terms like: these kids, back in my day, and mark of integrity. Then you feel a little better when you realize there’s still a part of you that is one “those kids.” Then you feel a little worse when you realize you were right in the first place. Finally you wonder whether the original argument has any merit whatsoever.
The issue that started this tragic logic lies in our culture of self promotion. We like to sell ourselves. In the last few years we’ve seen this notion taken to the extreme in the form of…t-shirts. Every day you walk down the street and see new t-shirts that tell us what that person wants us to believe. Instead of an “I’m With Stupid” shirt, you’re likely to see a “Stupid” shirt or another “great” slogan like:
“Don’t You Wish Your Girlfriend Was Hot Like Me”
“Sexy Bitch”
“My Other Shirt Is On Your Bedroom Floor”
“Pimp”
“Couch Potato 4 Life”
Now this is not a completely new phenomenon. We’ve always had personal names or nicknames on the back of sports jerseys and the occasional holiday shirts such as “Kiss Me I’m Irish.” You can argue whether these were annoying but they were isolated, only brought out for special occasion. The shirts today are being used to attract and reject people. These shirts scream stay away or come on up and ask me about my shirt. I should know, every couple of weeks you can find me wearing a shirt that says, “Self Loathing Pop Culture Fanatic.”
Yes, I’m also a self loathing self promoter. It’s been a great conversation starter and the web address on the back has actually provided some new readers. (By the way, I can’t wait until the summer when I won’t have to find excuses to take off my jacket and reveal the web address on the back of the shirt. I mean besides the, “it’s hot in here” line and the ability to spontaneously break into dance, that’s about all the excuses I got.) In the end though, my shirt falls in with the others I was just railing against. It screams, “I’m a pseudo intellectual that can discuss global politics one minute and recite the names of the cast members of the first 10 seasons of The Real World the next.”
Of course being the over thinker that I am I started to take the next step and think about people selling themselves and I realized it’s not a generational thing it’s a human thing. We’ve always used clothing and accessories to define us in other people’s eyes, from the Native Americans using different types of skins and dyes amongst tribes to the hippies in the 60’s. So you see this is nothing new just another step in the evolution of humanity.
To wrap it up, in one post I’ve managed to go from ripping on teens for poor clothing choices to championing them as the next step in humanity’s growth. I think I might need a shirt that says “Self Loathing Blogger.”
The issue that started this tragic logic lies in our culture of self promotion. We like to sell ourselves. In the last few years we’ve seen this notion taken to the extreme in the form of…t-shirts. Every day you walk down the street and see new t-shirts that tell us what that person wants us to believe. Instead of an “I’m With Stupid” shirt, you’re likely to see a “Stupid” shirt or another “great” slogan like:
“Don’t You Wish Your Girlfriend Was Hot Like Me”
“Sexy Bitch”
“My Other Shirt Is On Your Bedroom Floor”
“Pimp”
“Couch Potato 4 Life”
Now this is not a completely new phenomenon. We’ve always had personal names or nicknames on the back of sports jerseys and the occasional holiday shirts such as “Kiss Me I’m Irish.” You can argue whether these were annoying but they were isolated, only brought out for special occasion. The shirts today are being used to attract and reject people. These shirts scream stay away or come on up and ask me about my shirt. I should know, every couple of weeks you can find me wearing a shirt that says, “Self Loathing Pop Culture Fanatic.”
Yes, I’m also a self loathing self promoter. It’s been a great conversation starter and the web address on the back has actually provided some new readers. (By the way, I can’t wait until the summer when I won’t have to find excuses to take off my jacket and reveal the web address on the back of the shirt. I mean besides the, “it’s hot in here” line and the ability to spontaneously break into dance, that’s about all the excuses I got.) In the end though, my shirt falls in with the others I was just railing against. It screams, “I’m a pseudo intellectual that can discuss global politics one minute and recite the names of the cast members of the first 10 seasons of The Real World the next.”
Of course being the over thinker that I am I started to take the next step and think about people selling themselves and I realized it’s not a generational thing it’s a human thing. We’ve always used clothing and accessories to define us in other people’s eyes, from the Native Americans using different types of skins and dyes amongst tribes to the hippies in the 60’s. So you see this is nothing new just another step in the evolution of humanity.
To wrap it up, in one post I’ve managed to go from ripping on teens for poor clothing choices to championing them as the next step in humanity’s growth. I think I might need a shirt that says “Self Loathing Blogger.”
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
In Memoriam...8th & Ocean
Imagine my surprise to turn on tonight's 8th & Ocean to discover that it was the finale. Really MTV I'm not sure why I want to see more but tonights episode gave me some reasons.
1) I love a reality show where one of it's stars, Brit, nearly walks into a wall while filled with sexual repression.
2) I love a show where said stars agent, suggest she gets over her hang up about kissing a guy on a photo shoot by "closing her eyes and pretending she's kissing Jesus."
3) I love to watch to twins go through their see saw life. Really I've been setting my clocks based on the fact that when Kelly was up Sabrina was done and vice versa.
Although there was no teaser at the end for a future season, we did get a bit of a cliffhanger even though we all saw it coming. On the positive/negative front, there was a new trailer for The Hills, which stars LC from Laguna Beach, that just about guarantees I'll be losing even more self respect this summer and that I'll always have plenty of blog fodder. Thanks MTV for killing my soul.
1) I love a reality show where one of it's stars, Brit, nearly walks into a wall while filled with sexual repression.
2) I love a show where said stars agent, suggest she gets over her hang up about kissing a guy on a photo shoot by "closing her eyes and pretending she's kissing Jesus."
3) I love to watch to twins go through their see saw life. Really I've been setting my clocks based on the fact that when Kelly was up Sabrina was done and vice versa.
Although there was no teaser at the end for a future season, we did get a bit of a cliffhanger even though we all saw it coming. On the positive/negative front, there was a new trailer for The Hills, which stars LC from Laguna Beach, that just about guarantees I'll be losing even more self respect this summer and that I'll always have plenty of blog fodder. Thanks MTV for killing my soul.
Monday, May 08, 2006
The Point Game- Post Weekend Edition
-2: The O.C. for introducing the general public to the most annoying slang yet…obvi (short for obviously, as if that wasn’t…well…obvious). For the most part The O.C. has been a positive influence on pop culture from it’s geek sheik fashion to the various music acts they’ve “broken”. The writers and producers need to remember their power and not be so careless when they toss around new words.
-8: David Blaine. I remember watching a special on David Blaine back in 2001. He pretty much just walked around New York and did some freaky magic tricks on people. I thought it was great to see a magician do tricks on a small scale that can still amaze people. Who needs David Copperfield and his gimmicks like making the Statue of Liberty disappear, when you’ve got a real magician around. Five years later I’m longing for Copperfield or magic man Doug Henning. Blaine has become a stuntman, not a magician. Living in a snow globe for 8 days? Holding your breath for 9 minutes? Why not jump a school bus on your motorcycle next. Just makes me sad to see a guy who seemed to be an original genius turn into an original idiot.
+1: Family Guy for describing Sex and the City as a show about “3 hookers and their mom.” My love of Family Guy is only equaled by my confusion over the success of Sex and the City. Yet the quote only gets one point since I am suffering from a crisis of Family Guy faith ever since the South Park episode that revealed truth behind the FG writers.
-3: NBC for pulling the scheduled West Wing retrospective off its schedule with no explanation. For weeks, an hour long look back at the show was scheduled to air before next week’s finale but it has now been replaced with a repeat of the pilot episode. Maybe the clip show was no good but throw us a bone here as to the reason for the sudden change.
-2: Tom Hanks for phoning in Saturday Night Live. As I’ve stated many times I don’t care for Hanks as an actor but he’s at his best doing comedy. His past SNL performances have been very good so I actually recorded this Saturday’s show. Big mistake. I suppose it could have been the massive hangover I was recovering from or the lack of good writing but it seemed like Hanks just didn’t care. SNL still has its occasional moments but this weekend was not one of them.
+3: Saturday Night Life. I usually don’t talk about my non pop culture life on the blog but I had to give some points up after my Saturday night. I may be getting older but there’s still something appealing about attending a house party, especially one where you only know a handful of people. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, “I hate people, but I love gatherings. Isn’t it ironic?” You’re thrown into social situations that you don’t find in everyday life. So on Saturday, besides being introduced to a number of fascinating people, I was also introduced to shampooing, a variation of a keg stand. In fact, when I saw people leaning back in a chair sucking beer right from the tap I must admit I made a few derogatory comments about the task. So after accepting a challenge I settled back and gave it a try. Not as easy as it looked and almost as difficult as a keg stand. As a bonus, you don’t have to impose on others to pick you up…at least not until later in the night when you’re passed out on the floor.
-8: David Blaine. I remember watching a special on David Blaine back in 2001. He pretty much just walked around New York and did some freaky magic tricks on people. I thought it was great to see a magician do tricks on a small scale that can still amaze people. Who needs David Copperfield and his gimmicks like making the Statue of Liberty disappear, when you’ve got a real magician around. Five years later I’m longing for Copperfield or magic man Doug Henning. Blaine has become a stuntman, not a magician. Living in a snow globe for 8 days? Holding your breath for 9 minutes? Why not jump a school bus on your motorcycle next. Just makes me sad to see a guy who seemed to be an original genius turn into an original idiot.
+1: Family Guy for describing Sex and the City as a show about “3 hookers and their mom.” My love of Family Guy is only equaled by my confusion over the success of Sex and the City. Yet the quote only gets one point since I am suffering from a crisis of Family Guy faith ever since the South Park episode that revealed truth behind the FG writers.
-3: NBC for pulling the scheduled West Wing retrospective off its schedule with no explanation. For weeks, an hour long look back at the show was scheduled to air before next week’s finale but it has now been replaced with a repeat of the pilot episode. Maybe the clip show was no good but throw us a bone here as to the reason for the sudden change.
-2: Tom Hanks for phoning in Saturday Night Live. As I’ve stated many times I don’t care for Hanks as an actor but he’s at his best doing comedy. His past SNL performances have been very good so I actually recorded this Saturday’s show. Big mistake. I suppose it could have been the massive hangover I was recovering from or the lack of good writing but it seemed like Hanks just didn’t care. SNL still has its occasional moments but this weekend was not one of them.
+3: Saturday Night Life. I usually don’t talk about my non pop culture life on the blog but I had to give some points up after my Saturday night. I may be getting older but there’s still something appealing about attending a house party, especially one where you only know a handful of people. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, “I hate people, but I love gatherings. Isn’t it ironic?” You’re thrown into social situations that you don’t find in everyday life. So on Saturday, besides being introduced to a number of fascinating people, I was also introduced to shampooing, a variation of a keg stand. In fact, when I saw people leaning back in a chair sucking beer right from the tap I must admit I made a few derogatory comments about the task. So after accepting a challenge I settled back and gave it a try. Not as easy as it looked and almost as difficult as a keg stand. As a bonus, you don’t have to impose on others to pick you up…at least not until later in the night when you’re passed out on the floor.
Friday, May 05, 2006
What I’m…: Special Wednesday Rules! Edition
*******SPOILERS LIE BELOW FROM LAST WEDNESDAY NIGHT’S TV, SO IF YOU TIVO’D OR TAPED STOP READING NOW***********
*******SERIOUSLY I’M ABOUT TO DISSECT AND PRAISE/RANT ABOUT LOST, ALIAS, AND A FEW OTHER WEDNESDAY NIGHT SHOWS*************
*******OK CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED, AND REALLY, SHOULDN’T YOU HAVE BEEN ABLE TO WATCH THE SHOWS BY NOW. I MEAN ITS FRIDAY FOR CHRIST’S SAKE*****************
…Watching
The Wednesday Night of Death- I’m a simple man who enjoys simple pleasures. On Wednesday night I cooked myself a simple but tasty pasta dish and opened a nice bottle of wine. I settled down in front my TV at 7pm CST, to enjoy my meal and catch some quality entertainment. I was planning on watching the Amazing Race, Alias, Lost, and Top Chef, and while I expecting to enjoy these shows I wasn’t expecting anything that would blow me away. Ooops! You can call me TNT 'cause my expectations got blown up.
I started my night with Alias. Now if you read my column on the demise of Alias you’ll remember I lamented the mishandling of Arvin Sloan. Stop the presses because my prayers have been answered. There have been signs that Sloan was slipping back to his dark ways but its all been for his sick daughter. Once she was cured Wednesday night you figured that’s it end of story. Thankfully Sloan recaptured his Rambaldi obsession and in a moment to remember was forced to choose between his daughter and his obsession. Kudos to both actors but especially Ron Rifkin for his portrayal of Sloan. While clearly torn the scary nasty way he literally pushed his daughter aside for the chance at discovering Rambaldi’s greatest mystery was heart wrenching even for people like me that have been crying out for evil Sloan. The voice over at the end really set the stage for the series endgame. Plus we lost a character that clearly would have been interesting to follow if the show had continued another season when Renee got her throat sliced by dopple-sydney. (Death count: 2)
Next I watched the Amazing Race which I recorded on my DVR. This season has been classic Race and a welcome change from the Family Edition where they raced almost exclusively in the U.S. I think the reason some reality shows fresh is because the players find new wrinkles in the game play. For example, I’ve never seen one team cancel another’s taxi service, let alone 2 teams. As a viewer it makes you wonder why that’s never been done before. While no one died on the Race I’m sad to say I think the hippies hopes died when they finished last again. How do you run a race with no shoes? Poor hippies. (Death count: 4)
The race was a nice pallet cleanser before getting into Lost. This season has moved more slowly then the first but I haven’t seen that as a negative. It’s allowed the show to focus more on character moments and to ponder the bigger questions, and I mean ponder. I figured it was all set up for an intense final month with plot turns and revelations but nothing could prepare me for the final 5 minutes on Wednesday. The whole episode seemed like a set up. I figured Henry would overpower Ana Lucia take her gun and kill her. I even thought Locke might turn on her and help Henry. Michael? Holy shit! Libby next? Shocked silence. Is Michael one of the Others? Is he doing the Others bidding to get Walt back? Is he trying to use the massacre as a rallying point to convince the rest of the Oceanic folks that the Others must be taken out? By the way I’m guessing no matter which option comes true, the description he gave of the Other’s camp was completely erroneous. Can’t wait to sit down next fall and watch the whole second season in a short time span I think that will really be where the show sparkles. (Death count: 6)
Finally I wrapped my evening with Top Chef. Yet another reality show I swore I’d never watch. The thing is I love cooking and food and after stumbling across…you guessed it…a Saturday mini marathon I found myself tuning in. No super appealing reality characters but watching them cook and listening to the judges is a lot of fun. Plus, who would have guessed the twist ending where Tiffani stabbed Leann. (Death count: 7)
Sometimes the idiot box can almost make you forget that it's an idiot box.
*******SERIOUSLY I’M ABOUT TO DISSECT AND PRAISE/RANT ABOUT LOST, ALIAS, AND A FEW OTHER WEDNESDAY NIGHT SHOWS*************
*******OK CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED, AND REALLY, SHOULDN’T YOU HAVE BEEN ABLE TO WATCH THE SHOWS BY NOW. I MEAN ITS FRIDAY FOR CHRIST’S SAKE*****************
…Watching
The Wednesday Night of Death- I’m a simple man who enjoys simple pleasures. On Wednesday night I cooked myself a simple but tasty pasta dish and opened a nice bottle of wine. I settled down in front my TV at 7pm CST, to enjoy my meal and catch some quality entertainment. I was planning on watching the Amazing Race, Alias, Lost, and Top Chef, and while I expecting to enjoy these shows I wasn’t expecting anything that would blow me away. Ooops! You can call me TNT 'cause my expectations got blown up.
I started my night with Alias. Now if you read my column on the demise of Alias you’ll remember I lamented the mishandling of Arvin Sloan. Stop the presses because my prayers have been answered. There have been signs that Sloan was slipping back to his dark ways but its all been for his sick daughter. Once she was cured Wednesday night you figured that’s it end of story. Thankfully Sloan recaptured his Rambaldi obsession and in a moment to remember was forced to choose between his daughter and his obsession. Kudos to both actors but especially Ron Rifkin for his portrayal of Sloan. While clearly torn the scary nasty way he literally pushed his daughter aside for the chance at discovering Rambaldi’s greatest mystery was heart wrenching even for people like me that have been crying out for evil Sloan. The voice over at the end really set the stage for the series endgame. Plus we lost a character that clearly would have been interesting to follow if the show had continued another season when Renee got her throat sliced by dopple-sydney. (Death count: 2)
Next I watched the Amazing Race which I recorded on my DVR. This season has been classic Race and a welcome change from the Family Edition where they raced almost exclusively in the U.S. I think the reason some reality shows fresh is because the players find new wrinkles in the game play. For example, I’ve never seen one team cancel another’s taxi service, let alone 2 teams. As a viewer it makes you wonder why that’s never been done before. While no one died on the Race I’m sad to say I think the hippies hopes died when they finished last again. How do you run a race with no shoes? Poor hippies. (Death count: 4)
The race was a nice pallet cleanser before getting into Lost. This season has moved more slowly then the first but I haven’t seen that as a negative. It’s allowed the show to focus more on character moments and to ponder the bigger questions, and I mean ponder. I figured it was all set up for an intense final month with plot turns and revelations but nothing could prepare me for the final 5 minutes on Wednesday. The whole episode seemed like a set up. I figured Henry would overpower Ana Lucia take her gun and kill her. I even thought Locke might turn on her and help Henry. Michael? Holy shit! Libby next? Shocked silence. Is Michael one of the Others? Is he doing the Others bidding to get Walt back? Is he trying to use the massacre as a rallying point to convince the rest of the Oceanic folks that the Others must be taken out? By the way I’m guessing no matter which option comes true, the description he gave of the Other’s camp was completely erroneous. Can’t wait to sit down next fall and watch the whole second season in a short time span I think that will really be where the show sparkles. (Death count: 6)
Finally I wrapped my evening with Top Chef. Yet another reality show I swore I’d never watch. The thing is I love cooking and food and after stumbling across…you guessed it…a Saturday mini marathon I found myself tuning in. No super appealing reality characters but watching them cook and listening to the judges is a lot of fun. Plus, who would have guessed the twist ending where Tiffani stabbed Leann. (Death count: 7)
Sometimes the idiot box can almost make you forget that it's an idiot box.
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Top 10 Can’t Miss Movies of the Summer: #1 and Recap/Box Office
1. Clerks II (August 18)
Ok so this is not a big shot if you’ve been reading the blog for the last month or so. I am so jazzed for this flick mostly because I love me some Kevin Smith. I think the idea of visiting Dante and Randall ten plus years after the original is a great idea. While I never craved a sequel per se, I always enjoyed references or appearances by Clerks alumni in the other View Askew films.
Now I’ve heard some haters say the opposite that Smith is just trying to make a quick buck after the box office failure of Jersey Girl. Now unless Smith has John Daly type gambling losses I’m pretty sure the guy is set for life. Also, Clerks II will be getting a relatively small release so while it should do a good per screen average I don’t think the box office favorites like Superman have anything to worry about. Yet I do think there is some truth to pointing to this flick being born out of the Jersey Girl failure though.
If you haven’t seen Jersey Girl, and there’s a pretty good chance you haven’t, I highly recommend it. That being said it was evident that the process and results left Smith disappointed. The film was literally doomed before it hit the screen. Thanks to the Bennifer drama and their truly god awful Gigli movie, Smith had to deal with the brutal reality of casting friends AND their girlfriends. I think the ratings process also must have killed him. Here he was trying to tell his most adult story in a grown up way and the MPAA treated him like he was trying to make Mallrats 2. As a result I’m guessing we’re getting the proverbial shit storm from Clerks II. There have already been rumblings that the Weinsteins have a distribution deal that requires an R rating but Smith has been vocal that if he gets an NC-17 rating then that’s what we’ll get in the theaters. A raunchy, potty mouth filled, guide to middle aged angst as told by two guys who shouldn’t even be there today.
So here’s the final list:
10. Cars
9. Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
8. Nacho Libre
7. Miami Vice
6. The Da Vinci Code
5. Mission Impossible: III
4. X Men: The Last Stand
3. Snakes on a Plane
2. Superman Returns
1. Clerks II
Some people asked for my box office predictions but the truth is I don’t care much for the box office. I’ll pay attention but really only to see if the general public is as gutless and moronic as I believe them to be or to see if I’ll be surprised and see a genuine, smart film get financial recognition. If Poseidon does over $200 million then there’s something wrong with America.
Ok so this is not a big shot if you’ve been reading the blog for the last month or so. I am so jazzed for this flick mostly because I love me some Kevin Smith. I think the idea of visiting Dante and Randall ten plus years after the original is a great idea. While I never craved a sequel per se, I always enjoyed references or appearances by Clerks alumni in the other View Askew films.
Now I’ve heard some haters say the opposite that Smith is just trying to make a quick buck after the box office failure of Jersey Girl. Now unless Smith has John Daly type gambling losses I’m pretty sure the guy is set for life. Also, Clerks II will be getting a relatively small release so while it should do a good per screen average I don’t think the box office favorites like Superman have anything to worry about. Yet I do think there is some truth to pointing to this flick being born out of the Jersey Girl failure though.
If you haven’t seen Jersey Girl, and there’s a pretty good chance you haven’t, I highly recommend it. That being said it was evident that the process and results left Smith disappointed. The film was literally doomed before it hit the screen. Thanks to the Bennifer drama and their truly god awful Gigli movie, Smith had to deal with the brutal reality of casting friends AND their girlfriends. I think the ratings process also must have killed him. Here he was trying to tell his most adult story in a grown up way and the MPAA treated him like he was trying to make Mallrats 2. As a result I’m guessing we’re getting the proverbial shit storm from Clerks II. There have already been rumblings that the Weinsteins have a distribution deal that requires an R rating but Smith has been vocal that if he gets an NC-17 rating then that’s what we’ll get in the theaters. A raunchy, potty mouth filled, guide to middle aged angst as told by two guys who shouldn’t even be there today.
So here’s the final list:
10. Cars
9. Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby
8. Nacho Libre
7. Miami Vice
6. The Da Vinci Code
5. Mission Impossible: III
4. X Men: The Last Stand
3. Snakes on a Plane
2. Superman Returns
1. Clerks II
Some people asked for my box office predictions but the truth is I don’t care much for the box office. I’ll pay attention but really only to see if the general public is as gutless and moronic as I believe them to be or to see if I’ll be surprised and see a genuine, smart film get financial recognition. If Poseidon does over $200 million then there’s something wrong with America.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Top 10 Can’t Miss Movies of the Summer: #2
2. Superman Returns (June 30)
In general I find Superman to be a boring character thanks to qualities like his invulnerability, his Boy Scout morality and his USA USA mentality. From time to time certain creators in film, TV and comics have embraced these same qualities and turned them on their head resulting in some truly enthralling stories. In addition to the dual role Superman balances with Clark Kent, he also balances being raised human but being alien. For all his Midwestern charm and flag waving he’s still an outsider because of his DNA and his scary amount of power. Recent representations that have capitalized on these ideas are the classic graphic novel Kingdom Come, the TV series Justice League Unlimited, and the film Superman II.
For all intensive purposes the last Superman movie in theaters was Superman II. The third and fourth installments in the 80’s dug a grave so deep for this franchise, it made Batman Forever look like a pot hole. I’ll never forget throwing up repeatedly after watching Superman III as a kid. My grandmother blamed the quadruple cheeseburger and its full pound of beef I got at Wendy’s but I’ll always blame the movie itself.
Waiting this long to do a new Superman film is a surprisingly smart move from a studio (Warner Bros.) that has historically put money over quality. Now part of it was they had to distance themselves from those horrible sequels but a bigger factor was that Superman was stuck in the Phantom Zone of development hell. Kevin Smith, Tim Burton, Michael Bay, JJ Abrams, Wolfgang Peterson; these are just some of the writers and directors attached to the project over the years, along with actors like Nic Cage and Mel Gibson. All these names possess talent but as fate would have it, none would be able to see their vision come to pass. In the end, one thing fell through after the other and we’re left with Brian Singer and something called Brandon Routh.
Coming off the first two X Men films, Singer has showed his chops as an action director that can still keep the focus on characters and story. While I was saddened to see him leave X Men 3, you knew Superman would benefit. The casting of Routh is one of the many ways Singer is respecting and emulating the first two Superman movies by Richard Donner. Routh is an unknown much like Christopher Reeves was when he stepped into the underoos. Singer is also loosely picking up where Superman II left off. While not calling it a sequel, he has said in interviews that after events similar to the second movie Superman has left Earth. The new score even features element of John Williams’s classic music.
Here’s another summer flick where I’m not sure what we’re going to get but the possibilities are super exciting (no pun intended). The full trailer just came out and Kevin Spacey looks to have discovered a crazy scary evil to Lex Luthor as opposed to Gene Hackman’s crazy funny evil version. The shots look epic and remind me of the small snippets we had going in to Batman Begins. I’m looking for the same kind of results here as Superman Returns has a chance to reinvent a franchise and bury painful memories of Nuclear Man and the quest for peace.
In general I find Superman to be a boring character thanks to qualities like his invulnerability, his Boy Scout morality and his USA USA mentality. From time to time certain creators in film, TV and comics have embraced these same qualities and turned them on their head resulting in some truly enthralling stories. In addition to the dual role Superman balances with Clark Kent, he also balances being raised human but being alien. For all his Midwestern charm and flag waving he’s still an outsider because of his DNA and his scary amount of power. Recent representations that have capitalized on these ideas are the classic graphic novel Kingdom Come, the TV series Justice League Unlimited, and the film Superman II.
For all intensive purposes the last Superman movie in theaters was Superman II. The third and fourth installments in the 80’s dug a grave so deep for this franchise, it made Batman Forever look like a pot hole. I’ll never forget throwing up repeatedly after watching Superman III as a kid. My grandmother blamed the quadruple cheeseburger and its full pound of beef I got at Wendy’s but I’ll always blame the movie itself.
Waiting this long to do a new Superman film is a surprisingly smart move from a studio (Warner Bros.) that has historically put money over quality. Now part of it was they had to distance themselves from those horrible sequels but a bigger factor was that Superman was stuck in the Phantom Zone of development hell. Kevin Smith, Tim Burton, Michael Bay, JJ Abrams, Wolfgang Peterson; these are just some of the writers and directors attached to the project over the years, along with actors like Nic Cage and Mel Gibson. All these names possess talent but as fate would have it, none would be able to see their vision come to pass. In the end, one thing fell through after the other and we’re left with Brian Singer and something called Brandon Routh.
Coming off the first two X Men films, Singer has showed his chops as an action director that can still keep the focus on characters and story. While I was saddened to see him leave X Men 3, you knew Superman would benefit. The casting of Routh is one of the many ways Singer is respecting and emulating the first two Superman movies by Richard Donner. Routh is an unknown much like Christopher Reeves was when he stepped into the underoos. Singer is also loosely picking up where Superman II left off. While not calling it a sequel, he has said in interviews that after events similar to the second movie Superman has left Earth. The new score even features element of John Williams’s classic music.
Here’s another summer flick where I’m not sure what we’re going to get but the possibilities are super exciting (no pun intended). The full trailer just came out and Kevin Spacey looks to have discovered a crazy scary evil to Lex Luthor as opposed to Gene Hackman’s crazy funny evil version. The shots look epic and remind me of the small snippets we had going in to Batman Begins. I’m looking for the same kind of results here as Superman Returns has a chance to reinvent a franchise and bury painful memories of Nuclear Man and the quest for peace.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Top 10 Can’t Miss Movies of the Summer: #4 and #3
4. X Men: The Last Stand (May 26)
The X Men film series can be credited for making the comic book movie a viable option in Hollywood and for that we should all be thankful. After two solid outings Fox announced a third edition that they targeted to go against DC’s new Superman pic. Well now they’ll be targeting a piece of themselves as director Brian Singer left the X Men saga and flew over to Supes. After a couple of false starts on replacements, Brett Rattner of Rush Hour fame stepped in with less then a year to finish the film and get it into theaters. Ever since, there have been the familiar cries of anguish from fan boys including: “The script sucks!” “The costumes aren’t right” and my favorite, “The hair isn’t right.” Now I’m not saying the fan boys don’t have any cause for worry. The plot looks like a carbon of the first two films as yet again humans try to cure mutants and vice versa. I’m also not a huge fan of Rattner. Will we get the director who did an impressive job with Red Dragon or the lazy director who brought us the tired Rush Hour 2? I’ll let you know because no amount of bad hype will discourage me. The trailer is surprisingly good and the cast has really grown into the roles. Plus, if this really is the last X film (yeah right) then I want to be there.
3. Snakes on a Plane (August 18)
As a SoaP soldier it’s my continued duty to spread the word on this summer’s guilty pleasure. Even after multiple blog references and articles in mainstream press there are still some who just don’t know or just don’t care about Sam Jackson and a plane full of mutherfuckin’ snakes. This is not going to be an Oscar worthy movie but it’s guaranteed to be a surreal experience. I foresee theaters full of people laughing when they aren’t supposed to laugh and cheering when they shouldn’t be. New Line has done such a remarkable job marketing the film considering the amount of hype has hit a new high and we still haven’t seen a minute of footage. August 18th can’t get hear soon enough.
The X Men film series can be credited for making the comic book movie a viable option in Hollywood and for that we should all be thankful. After two solid outings Fox announced a third edition that they targeted to go against DC’s new Superman pic. Well now they’ll be targeting a piece of themselves as director Brian Singer left the X Men saga and flew over to Supes. After a couple of false starts on replacements, Brett Rattner of Rush Hour fame stepped in with less then a year to finish the film and get it into theaters. Ever since, there have been the familiar cries of anguish from fan boys including: “The script sucks!” “The costumes aren’t right” and my favorite, “The hair isn’t right.” Now I’m not saying the fan boys don’t have any cause for worry. The plot looks like a carbon of the first two films as yet again humans try to cure mutants and vice versa. I’m also not a huge fan of Rattner. Will we get the director who did an impressive job with Red Dragon or the lazy director who brought us the tired Rush Hour 2? I’ll let you know because no amount of bad hype will discourage me. The trailer is surprisingly good and the cast has really grown into the roles. Plus, if this really is the last X film (yeah right) then I want to be there.
3. Snakes on a Plane (August 18)
As a SoaP soldier it’s my continued duty to spread the word on this summer’s guilty pleasure. Even after multiple blog references and articles in mainstream press there are still some who just don’t know or just don’t care about Sam Jackson and a plane full of mutherfuckin’ snakes. This is not going to be an Oscar worthy movie but it’s guaranteed to be a surreal experience. I foresee theaters full of people laughing when they aren’t supposed to laugh and cheering when they shouldn’t be. New Line has done such a remarkable job marketing the film considering the amount of hype has hit a new high and we still haven’t seen a minute of footage. August 18th can’t get hear soon enough.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Top 10 Can’t Miss Movies of the Summer: #6 and #5
6. The DaVinci Code (May 19)I love Dan Brown's books and of course the Code got me going on all his other works. They all seem to have a quality that should translate well to film. Then I heard Ron Howard was directing. Strike one. Then I heard Tom Hanks was taking on the role of Robert Langdon. Strike two. Then I saw his hair. Strike three. Still I'm excited to see the end results. Howard made a point to cast a truly international cast to fill the international cast of characters. Hanks and Howard did the best work of their careers when they did Splash in the 80's so that's a positive as well. In the end I'm not sure what we'll get but it will be interesting to see how closely it adheres to novel.
5. Mission Impossible 3 (May 5)While I loathe Tom Hanks for his lack of acting ability, I actually enjoy listening to the guy talk. On the other side of the spectrum you have Tom Cruise who I loathe for his craziness and insane level of celebrity but respect quite a bit as an actor. The first two MI's have been hit and miss. I didn't care for #1 but I liked the direction it was going in. #2 was an over the top John Woo spectacle that I enjoyed despite the excessive dove and rainbow shots. Now we get #3 and everything looks like its in place to make this the defining MI film. J.J Abrams of Lost and Alias fame is directing his first feature film and while that could be daunting all signs point to him pulling it off. Cruise is facing off against Philip Seymour Hoffman, who by the looks of the previews has created a truly evil villain. As long as I don't have to watch Cruise do all the press outlets I'll be super pumped for this one.
5. Mission Impossible 3 (May 5)While I loathe Tom Hanks for his lack of acting ability, I actually enjoy listening to the guy talk. On the other side of the spectrum you have Tom Cruise who I loathe for his craziness and insane level of celebrity but respect quite a bit as an actor. The first two MI's have been hit and miss. I didn't care for #1 but I liked the direction it was going in. #2 was an over the top John Woo spectacle that I enjoyed despite the excessive dove and rainbow shots. Now we get #3 and everything looks like its in place to make this the defining MI film. J.J Abrams of Lost and Alias fame is directing his first feature film and while that could be daunting all signs point to him pulling it off. Cruise is facing off against Philip Seymour Hoffman, who by the looks of the previews has created a truly evil villain. As long as I don't have to watch Cruise do all the press outlets I'll be super pumped for this one.
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