"You're a mess just standing there."
With those 6 word Michael Korrs said what we've all been thinking ever since Angela stepped onto this season of Project Runway. Her fascination with rosettes showed her to be a one dimensional designer that even fashion inept people like myself recognized. So take your ball shaped whiny mother and go back to Ohio and make your Holly Hobby clothes made out of organic materials.
Okay now that I've gotten that venom out of my system, I think it's time to handicap the final contestants as we near the finish line.
Michael: 3-1, He has placed in the top 2 the last four weeks and 5 if you count the fact that he was on Angela's winning team back in the INC challenge. The judges love him and he certainly has a distinct style that comes through. The only negative is a complete lack of any reality show character except for the Captain Save-a-ho bit. Then again I'm always bitching about how nice normal people never win these things.
Uli: 5-1, I thought Uli was in a dead heat with Michael until this week. The judges really called her out on her repetitive style choices. Still everything she has made has looked great and she's never been on the hot seat.
Jeffrey: 10-1, Glad he won last night just because he might shut up about not winning for a while but I'm not sure he has the versatility to win it all. His rock looks are cool but a whole line for fashion week could be a challenge. I could see him making it to the final 3 but he's also the type that could make a horrible outfit that gets him booted early.
Laura: 12-1, I think Laura's a safe bet to make the final 3 if Jeffery doesn't but I just can't see her winning the whole thing. Everything is safe and boring which might get her to Fashion Week but not to the top prize. Oh well she always has architecture and her 38 kids.
Vincent: 20-1, If I had a dark horse it would be Vincent. He's crazy and has made some truly ugly outfits but he's still there people. If he makes it to Fashion Week I think he's just crazy enough to pull off the upset. Safe money will be on him leaving in the next 2 weeks though.
Kayne: 50-1, Does anyone really think Kayne will make it to Fashion Week let alone next week? I love the guy, his comments make the show right now but he just can't get the gay cowboy beauty queen theme out of his clothes. Unlike Santino or even Jeffrey who make outrageous clothes that go over the top in style, Kayne makes clothes that are over the top in taste. Again I'd like to see him stick around but one of the other contestants is really going to have to screw up for him to stay another week.
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
More Benefits of Being Unemployed
Well for those of you that don't know I'm still out on the job hunt. I'll actually be working next week at a temp job for the first time in about a month so that's something. Plus, I actually turned down a job offer this week so at least there's been movement. In the meantime I've found two more benefits to being unemployed.
Benefit #15: Can go to the great Minnesota State Fair in the middle of a weekday.
For those outstaters that don't know, the Minnesota State Fair is the granddaddy of all Fairs. Every year the fairgrounds are overrun by the old, the fat, the young, the obese, the city folk, the big and tall shoppers, the country folk and, did I mention, people as wide as their trailers. Yes the fair is a celebration of food above all else and I am no different when it comes to indulging in the deep fried treats. Take a look at my eating itinerary on Tuesday:
1:25pm Arrive at Fair, eat a bag of Tom Thumb Mini Donuts (if they're not Tom Thumb then they ain't donuts)
1:55pm Bratwurst in Beer Batter deep fried on a stick (Bought a water so that's kind of healthy, righty?)
2:05pm Spicy Nacho Sausage (sausage wrapped in puff pastry with nacho cheese sauce for dipping)
2:40pm Apple Carmel Malt from the Dairy Stand in Empire Commons (After going to the fair for over 15 years I just found out last year I was getting my malts from the wrong place. Now that I've tried the real deal I'm living in a world full of regret.)
3:20pm Buffalo Chicken Wontons (These actually had a nice kick to 'em.)
3:35pm Deep Fried Cheese Curds (Gotta get the ones in the food building or like the donuts, your just eating a wannabe.)
4:00pm Macaroni & Cheese on a Stick (These are really just nuggets of deep fried mac & cheese and the stick serves no real purpose but damn it's sinfully good.)
4:40pm Sweet Martha's Chocolate Chip Cookies (Thankfully this year I just got the small cone but between my moms and me they were all gone by the time we reached the exit around 5pm)
Benefit #16: Catch up on Netflix queue
I've made such a dent in my Netflix queue that I actually downgraded to a cheaper program (probably a wise move given my employment situation). In the last week I've gone through 2 seasons of the animated show Home Movies. If you missed Home Movies when it debuted on UPN in 1999 then you're not alone. Thankfully Cartoon Network and Adult Swim came to the rescue and ordered up more Home Movies right up until it's fourth and final season. The show looks like Dr. Katz and has a similar comic sensibility as 3 kids try to produce quality independent films while dealing with their parents and mostly drunk soccer coach. Perhaps I like it so much because of my film background or maybe it's just because it's damn funny. Also caught V for Vendetta last week. I honestly expected to hate this flick. The last 2 Matrix movies really soured me on the Warchowski brothers and I was afraid what they and their puppet director would do with this classic graphic novel. The outcome shocked me. It was a bold and brave adaptation that screamed volumes about the world we lived in back in '84 (when the book was written) and even more so about today. Scary good plus anytime Natalie Portman plays dress up prostitute you can count me in. My last recommendation is a film that will not be for everyone, Brick. It's a film noir set in a present day high school where everyone talks like they're in a film noir from the 40's. I think some people will need subtitles to keep up with the dialogue but I loved it. First time director/writer Rian Johnson creates a beautifully brutal world and while some of the plot is telegraphed this is a flick that's all about the journey. I'm adding this to my early top 10 list but again if you have trouble keeping up with difficult dialogue then take a pass on this one.
Benefit #15: Can go to the great Minnesota State Fair in the middle of a weekday.
For those outstaters that don't know, the Minnesota State Fair is the granddaddy of all Fairs. Every year the fairgrounds are overrun by the old, the fat, the young, the obese, the city folk, the big and tall shoppers, the country folk and, did I mention, people as wide as their trailers. Yes the fair is a celebration of food above all else and I am no different when it comes to indulging in the deep fried treats. Take a look at my eating itinerary on Tuesday:
1:25pm Arrive at Fair, eat a bag of Tom Thumb Mini Donuts (if they're not Tom Thumb then they ain't donuts)
1:55pm Bratwurst in Beer Batter deep fried on a stick (Bought a water so that's kind of healthy, righty?)
2:05pm Spicy Nacho Sausage (sausage wrapped in puff pastry with nacho cheese sauce for dipping)
2:40pm Apple Carmel Malt from the Dairy Stand in Empire Commons (After going to the fair for over 15 years I just found out last year I was getting my malts from the wrong place. Now that I've tried the real deal I'm living in a world full of regret.)
3:20pm Buffalo Chicken Wontons (These actually had a nice kick to 'em.)
3:35pm Deep Fried Cheese Curds (Gotta get the ones in the food building or like the donuts, your just eating a wannabe.)
4:00pm Macaroni & Cheese on a Stick (These are really just nuggets of deep fried mac & cheese and the stick serves no real purpose but damn it's sinfully good.)
4:40pm Sweet Martha's Chocolate Chip Cookies (Thankfully this year I just got the small cone but between my moms and me they were all gone by the time we reached the exit around 5pm)
Benefit #16: Catch up on Netflix queue
I've made such a dent in my Netflix queue that I actually downgraded to a cheaper program (probably a wise move given my employment situation). In the last week I've gone through 2 seasons of the animated show Home Movies. If you missed Home Movies when it debuted on UPN in 1999 then you're not alone. Thankfully Cartoon Network and Adult Swim came to the rescue and ordered up more Home Movies right up until it's fourth and final season. The show looks like Dr. Katz and has a similar comic sensibility as 3 kids try to produce quality independent films while dealing with their parents and mostly drunk soccer coach. Perhaps I like it so much because of my film background or maybe it's just because it's damn funny. Also caught V for Vendetta last week. I honestly expected to hate this flick. The last 2 Matrix movies really soured me on the Warchowski brothers and I was afraid what they and their puppet director would do with this classic graphic novel. The outcome shocked me. It was a bold and brave adaptation that screamed volumes about the world we lived in back in '84 (when the book was written) and even more so about today. Scary good plus anytime Natalie Portman plays dress up prostitute you can count me in. My last recommendation is a film that will not be for everyone, Brick. It's a film noir set in a present day high school where everyone talks like they're in a film noir from the 40's. I think some people will need subtitles to keep up with the dialogue but I loved it. First time director/writer Rian Johnson creates a beautifully brutal world and while some of the plot is telegraphed this is a flick that's all about the journey. I'm adding this to my early top 10 list but again if you have trouble keeping up with difficult dialogue then take a pass on this one.
Monday, August 28, 2006
Emmy Thoughts
I tend to hold the Emmy’s in low regard. How can an award show that claims to reward TV’s finest ignore shows over the years like Buffy, Scrubs, Veronica Mars and actors like Lauren Graham and David Cross? Sure they’ve improved a little bit over the last few years giving Lost and Arrested Development their due but clearly the reason to watch last night was Conan O’Brian and boy did he not disappoint. From the Oscar-esqe opening sequence to his song and dance routine to his torture of Bob Newhart, Conan stole the show. I’m a big fan of the self deprecating humor (it’s pretty much my bread and butter) and Conan is king. I’d like to see him get a shot at hosting Oscar someday as he clearly has the chops. Other highlights:
* Colbert and Stewart presenting to an audience full of “godless sodomites” while Colbert lamented his loss to Barry Manilow.
* The multiple shots of Tori Spelling and her mom clearly seated on opposite sides of the theater during the Aaron Spelling tribute. Tori still looked pissed that she didn’t get much out of daddy’s will while the widow Spelling looked like she was hamming it up for the cameras. By the by, why doesn’t Tori’s little brother act anymore he still looks like he could play a 15 year old on a 90210 type show?
* Big props to the Academy for recognizing The Office. While it would have been a nice final fuck you to Fox if Arrested Development had won, The Office certainly deserved it. Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant looked genuinely moved and uncomfortable by the amount of applause the shot of them in the audience generated.
* 24 winning was long overdue. While I felt the show went awry towards the end of the season, the first half was great and clearly this show should’ve picked up an Emmy long ago. It pretty much cleaned house in all the creative categories but I was sad to see the President and Mrs. Logan loose out in the supporting categories.
* Even though they were snubbed by not being nominated for best comedy series it was refreshing to see My Name is Earl take the writing and directing categories. Writer/creator Greg Garcia brought the funniest acceptance speech of the evening when he listed the people he did not want to thank including God since he took his hair.
And now the lowlights:
* While the Charlie’s Angels tribute to Spelling was moving, am I the only one who was disappointed that Farah didn’t have one of her patented meltdowns?
* Tony Shaloub is a great actor but I find it hard to believe he was more deserving then Larry David or Steve Carrell.
* Although they certainly took home enough gold over the years, it would have been nice to see West Wing take home a pity/hope you find new work award like Megan Mullally did for Will and Grace.
* Barry Manilow beating J Stew, and Colbert in the Variety/Musical/Comedy host category. As Colbert said, “I can’t believe I lost to the Copa Cabana!”
* Colbert and Stewart presenting to an audience full of “godless sodomites” while Colbert lamented his loss to Barry Manilow.
* The multiple shots of Tori Spelling and her mom clearly seated on opposite sides of the theater during the Aaron Spelling tribute. Tori still looked pissed that she didn’t get much out of daddy’s will while the widow Spelling looked like she was hamming it up for the cameras. By the by, why doesn’t Tori’s little brother act anymore he still looks like he could play a 15 year old on a 90210 type show?
* Big props to the Academy for recognizing The Office. While it would have been a nice final fuck you to Fox if Arrested Development had won, The Office certainly deserved it. Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant looked genuinely moved and uncomfortable by the amount of applause the shot of them in the audience generated.
* 24 winning was long overdue. While I felt the show went awry towards the end of the season, the first half was great and clearly this show should’ve picked up an Emmy long ago. It pretty much cleaned house in all the creative categories but I was sad to see the President and Mrs. Logan loose out in the supporting categories.
* Even though they were snubbed by not being nominated for best comedy series it was refreshing to see My Name is Earl take the writing and directing categories. Writer/creator Greg Garcia brought the funniest acceptance speech of the evening when he listed the people he did not want to thank including God since he took his hair.
And now the lowlights:
* While the Charlie’s Angels tribute to Spelling was moving, am I the only one who was disappointed that Farah didn’t have one of her patented meltdowns?
* Tony Shaloub is a great actor but I find it hard to believe he was more deserving then Larry David or Steve Carrell.
* Although they certainly took home enough gold over the years, it would have been nice to see West Wing take home a pity/hope you find new work award like Megan Mullally did for Will and Grace.
* Barry Manilow beating J Stew, and Colbert in the Variety/Musical/Comedy host category. As Colbert said, “I can’t believe I lost to the Copa Cabana!”
Friday, August 25, 2006
Detox Week The Final Day Plus MTV's done it again
All week I've been going through a detox process by taking a supplement and limiting my food intake to fruits, veggies, whole grains and nuts. I've avoided salt, dairy, alcohol, meat, fat and everything processed. I've stuck to drinking water and 100% fruit juice. The only cheating I've done is by adding some grated parmesan cheese here and there. All week I've more or less complained that this has had no effect on me and that I'm not noticing anything; that is until I cheated last night. Last night was poker night so I knew that I couldn't make it through the night as a non smoker. I picked up a pack and headed over to my buddy's place. I had 5 smokes over 5 hours which is about right for me on a night out. My body had no adverse reaction as I huffed them down and I was ready to declare the whole detox process a complete failure. Then I woke up today or should I say last night. With the influx of nicotine back in my system I had a devil of a time catching some Z's and then when I finally fell asleep it was only for a couple of hours at a time. Then I woke up for good and my whole body ached partly from smoking and partly from lack of sleep. I've been up for almost four hours now and I'm still feeling out of sorts. The moral of the story is that detox does work. You might not notice a great difference in how you feel, but inside your body does. A lot of people have asked if I'll do it again and my answer until today had been no. Now I plan on detoxing every 6 months or so and plan on doing it when I quit smoking for sure. Even though I longed for a cigarette every day knowing how bad that initial smoke will treat you certainly is a motivator. That's not to say I'm quitting tomorrow but I can say after this it's definitly in the plans. Starting tomorrow the food is back to normal and I'm jumping back in with both feet with a brunch out tomorrow, bar food at my fantasy football draft Sunday, and then heading to the greatest state fair in all the 50 states, the great Minnesota get together on Monday for plenty of deep fried things on sticks (my favorite is still mac & cheese on a stick).
My other note of the day is praise for yet another docudrama MTV has given us entitled 2 A Days. The program was filmed during a season of Hoover High football in Alabama. Football in Alabama is like football in Texas only smaller (because everything's bigger in Texas, get it?). The show follows the coach and a select group of players on and off the field. It’s a mix of the reality of Friday Night Lights and the soap opera element of Varsity Blues. As a football fan and, for better or worse, a fan of MTV shows this one hits the spot. The football action was fun to watch and you get caught up in the game while you begin to follow the relationships these kids have with their girlfriends, parents, and their coach. Catch the reply of the premiere this weekend, since it's on MTV I'm sure it airs about 30 times.
My other note of the day is praise for yet another docudrama MTV has given us entitled 2 A Days. The program was filmed during a season of Hoover High football in Alabama. Football in Alabama is like football in Texas only smaller (because everything's bigger in Texas, get it?). The show follows the coach and a select group of players on and off the field. It’s a mix of the reality of Friday Night Lights and the soap opera element of Varsity Blues. As a football fan and, for better or worse, a fan of MTV shows this one hits the spot. The football action was fun to watch and you get caught up in the game while you begin to follow the relationships these kids have with their girlfriends, parents, and their coach. Catch the reply of the premiere this weekend, since it's on MTV I'm sure it airs about 30 times.
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Detox Week Day 4: Runway Roundup
Ok now day 4 and I’m just not feeling it. Supposedly I’m getting all the bad toxins out of my system and while I certainly don’t feel bad, I’m not feeling any kind of great either. The diet is becoming extremely difficult to stick too. Today I had some peanuts and dried blueberries for a snack and then had some frozen green beans and almonds (no sauce). I bought cigarettes today in anticipation of Saturday but being that it’s poker night I might cheat a little. Otherwise I’m already planning breakfast or lunch on Saturday out with my mom and even planning on a little cheat by picking up a veggie sub tomorrow night. We shall see.
Now on to Runway last night. First off I so called the fact that they were designing for their moms. Look at last weeks preview and it practically gives it away. A fun idea in theory but obviously some designers got the short (and fat) straw. I must be an even meaner man then I thought because I actually thought Jeffrey was in the right when dealing with Angela’
s mom. Sorry to see Robert go but honestly he’s been on thin ice for weeks. The bigger joy was to see Laura actually get a good talking too. Can’t believe she’s having another kid because based on her audition video she’s already got 5 misbehavin’ kids. We’re down to seven designers already so buckle up as I really think the competitions going to be great the rest of the way.
Now on to Runway last night. First off I so called the fact that they were designing for their moms. Look at last weeks preview and it practically gives it away. A fun idea in theory but obviously some designers got the short (and fat) straw. I must be an even meaner man then I thought because I actually thought Jeffrey was in the right when dealing with Angela’
s mom. Sorry to see Robert go but honestly he’s been on thin ice for weeks. The bigger joy was to see Laura actually get a good talking too. Can’t believe she’s having another kid because based on her audition video she’s already got 5 misbehavin’ kids. We’re down to seven designers already so buckle up as I really think the competitions going to be great the rest of the way.
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Detox Week Day 3: Segregated Survivor?!?
Day 3 of detox is here and I’m beginning to feel a little different. First off I’ve noticed my usually pristine complexion is getting fouled up a bit by this. Secondly, I can say hands down that I really really like cigarettes. I’ve taken breaks and even quit before but I’m realizing from this 5 day vacation that when I make that final push to quit for good it’s going to be hellish. Also when you’re still unemployed smoking helps ease the day away and I miss that too. I stuck to the diet last night eating more of my noodle and spinach dish and today I’ve had some dried blueberries and unsalted peanuts. Plan on doing another bag of lettuce for dinner tonight with the only cheat being more parmesan. I haven’t lost any weight but that’s not really the point, plus I think I’m just eating more of the healthy stuff then I usually eat of the unhealthy stuff. Plan on taking a long walk in a bit and doing some deep breathing after that to add some excercise to the program.
The pop culture item of the day that caught my eye was the reveal of the new cast of Survivor. The mother of all reality shows still works for me and a reason for it’s continued success is it’s ability to introduce new changes that draw viewers in. Now comes word of this season’s twist and I must say I’m intrigued and slightly put off. This season will start with four tribes of four each separated into tribes by....RACE. That’s right it’s Asians vs. Latinos vs. African Americans vs. Honkeys. I must say this takes the whole human experiment to another level but on the other hand Survivor has always brought the worst out in people and I’m not sure if I want to see people at their racist best. Either way I think they’ve done their job by grabbing headlines and probably bringing some viewers back in to the fold just to see this play out. You know I’ll be there probably getting my full self loathing on.
The pop culture item of the day that caught my eye was the reveal of the new cast of Survivor. The mother of all reality shows still works for me and a reason for it’s continued success is it’s ability to introduce new changes that draw viewers in. Now comes word of this season’s twist and I must say I’m intrigued and slightly put off. This season will start with four tribes of four each separated into tribes by....RACE. That’s right it’s Asians vs. Latinos vs. African Americans vs. Honkeys. I must say this takes the whole human experiment to another level but on the other hand Survivor has always brought the worst out in people and I’m not sure if I want to see people at their racist best. Either way I think they’ve done their job by grabbing headlines and probably bringing some viewers back in to the fold just to see this play out. You know I’ll be there probably getting my full self loathing on.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Detox Week Day 2: The Passion of the Snakes
Well so far so good. I'm into my second day of detox and my body seems to be acting normally. Some possible side effects include furry tounges and spots according to the supplement bottle. I like that it just calls them spots and leaves it at that. Anyway nothing side effecty so far. I'm also sticking to the dietary suggestions. Yesterday I had a bag of lettuce with an olive oil based caeser dressing. The only no no I did was adding some parmesan cheese to the salad. I also had a few handfuls of nuts and dried blueberries. Today I discovered that whole wheat grains were okay and did some yolkless whole wheat egg noodles with some sauteed spinach and peanuts. Again my only cheat was a little parmesan on top. The toughest part so far has been after the eating because that's usually when I want a smoke or a glass of wine or beer.
Also wanted to talk a bit today about Snakes on a Plane for perhaps the last time. A lot of publications are calling the movie a failure commercially. While it's box office take was less then expected this weekend, it's already made half it's budget back. Plus this is a word of mouth movie that I predict will lead to big DVD sales which is where most flicks make their money these days. If you're Superman you might not be able to count on DVD to make the difference but for smaller films like SoaP and Clerks II (which has already turned a profit) DVD sales are the key factors these days. So don't let the media tell you SoaP is a failure and make sure to send your letters to Samuel L Jackson demanding the rhyming sequel...Snakes on a Train.
Also wanted to talk a bit today about Snakes on a Plane for perhaps the last time. A lot of publications are calling the movie a failure commercially. While it's box office take was less then expected this weekend, it's already made half it's budget back. Plus this is a word of mouth movie that I predict will lead to big DVD sales which is where most flicks make their money these days. If you're Superman you might not be able to count on DVD to make the difference but for smaller films like SoaP and Clerks II (which has already turned a profit) DVD sales are the key factors these days. So don't let the media tell you SoaP is a failure and make sure to send your letters to Samuel L Jackson demanding the rhyming sequel...Snakes on a Train.
Monday, August 21, 2006
Detox Week: Day 1 or "How I let Isaac from the Love Boat influence my life."
I moved back to Minneapolis a couple of weeks ago and in that brief time one of the benefits I've enjoyed is an increased activity in my social life. Of course for me that translates to more alcohol, smokes, and food then I had trained my body to expect in Madison. Needless to say abusing your body is like riding a bike...straight into a brick wall. While I'm feeling top notch for the most part, I received a little guidance from a friend and TV's best bartender (screw you Ted Danson) on how I can temporarily redeem myself in my body's eyes.
A couple weeks back I had my friends Kristen and Nikki over for a Project Runway night. As the host with the most I made a point to share some snacks with my guests, in this case, some M&Ms. While Kristen and I partook of the chocolate treats, Nikki abstained due to a detox program she was on. After some explaining I learned that this program is designed to clean out all the crap you stick in your body particularly in your liver. I was intrigued by the concept which consisted of eating lots of fruits and veggies while taking some kind of supplement that accelerates the process. Nikki said it's a 5 day program so that means if you start on a Monday you'll be free and clear to junk up your body by the next weekend.
A few days passed and I had forgotten about the detox conversation until I came across an episode of the new season of Celebrity Fit Club. Sad to say I always get a kick out of this show and while I'm not a religious viewer I'll certainly pause if I come across it. Anyhoo, the cast was just going through their first weigh in after starting their diets and they all talked about the detox process they did. Isaac from the Love Boat just couldn't stop talking about how great he felt after getting all the gunk in his trunk out of his body. I thought to myself if my friend can do it and 8 washed up has beens can do it then so can I.
Now here we are on day 1. I've been sipping on my supplement drink all day. I haven't eaten yet but that's not unusual for me. Rest assured I am stocked up with dry fruits, veggies, lettuce and plenty of water and 100% juice. I'll be keeping a log reporting on the results of this so called detox including what I eat and if I cheat. Finally we'll see the results and share them with you come Friday. I'm not sure what I want to get out of this but my liver has seen more booze then Alex Rodriguez at Yankee Stadium so I feel like it deserves a break.
A couple weeks back I had my friends Kristen and Nikki over for a Project Runway night. As the host with the most I made a point to share some snacks with my guests, in this case, some M&Ms. While Kristen and I partook of the chocolate treats, Nikki abstained due to a detox program she was on. After some explaining I learned that this program is designed to clean out all the crap you stick in your body particularly in your liver. I was intrigued by the concept which consisted of eating lots of fruits and veggies while taking some kind of supplement that accelerates the process. Nikki said it's a 5 day program so that means if you start on a Monday you'll be free and clear to junk up your body by the next weekend.
A few days passed and I had forgotten about the detox conversation until I came across an episode of the new season of Celebrity Fit Club. Sad to say I always get a kick out of this show and while I'm not a religious viewer I'll certainly pause if I come across it. Anyhoo, the cast was just going through their first weigh in after starting their diets and they all talked about the detox process they did. Isaac from the Love Boat just couldn't stop talking about how great he felt after getting all the gunk in his trunk out of his body. I thought to myself if my friend can do it and 8 washed up has beens can do it then so can I.
Now here we are on day 1. I've been sipping on my supplement drink all day. I haven't eaten yet but that's not unusual for me. Rest assured I am stocked up with dry fruits, veggies, lettuce and plenty of water and 100% juice. I'll be keeping a log reporting on the results of this so called detox including what I eat and if I cheat. Finally we'll see the results and share them with you come Friday. I'm not sure what I want to get out of this but my liver has seen more booze then Alex Rodriguez at Yankee Stadium so I feel like it deserves a break.
Saturday, August 19, 2006
What I’m...
...Renting
Inside Man
Spike Lee is an enigma wrapped inside a riddle. He can make great films like Do the Right Thing and bad ones like He Got Game. Gladly Inside Man is a positive. It’s almost too smart for it’s own good and further proves that Clive Owen is the new George Clooney. Seriously the man exudes cool. My only complaint was the trademark Spike shot of Denzel zooming past the background. It usually works in his films and is something he’ll be remembered for but it felt out of place in this flick. Jodi Foster is awesome with a capital A and the rest of the cast brings their A game. (please note the overuse of the letter A in the previous segment)
...Watching
The Soup on E!
I’ve always thought of The Soup as the lesser child of Best Week Ever but the more I watch it the more I crave it. Sure it might be behind the blog since it only airs once a week but it’s better written. I feel I’ve found a kindred spirit cause they seem to have the same save Brittney attitude that I do.
...Paying Money to see in a Theater
Snakes on a Plane
I’m not going to stop pimping this shit until you get off your lazy asses and see this thing. My local newspaper even stole my line about the characters being a cross between Airport and Airplane. If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a million times, if you like the very idea of snakes on a plane then this is the flick for you.
...Listening to
Top 5 on My iPod
1. Snakes on a Plane (Bring it)- Cobra Starship
Okay an obvious choice but the song is actually pretty good. The band is an all star “punk” band from the All American Rejects and their brethren. Add in two clips from the movie including “the line” and you’ve got a top10 hit.
2. Bossy- Kellis
I didn’t like it at first but even if you got white boy rhythm you can bounce to this track. I can’t believe she brought Too $hort out of hibernation to add a nice rap. Did I mention I’ve got an autographed picture of Too $hort?
3. L.O.V.E.- Ashlee Simpson
This was a total impulse buy after the season premiere of Laguna Beach but damn it if Ashlee can’t apply herself now and again.
4. Hungry Like The Wolf- Duran Duran
I have no idea what motivated this drunk download but thank the gods I now have some of the 80’s best pop band on my iPod.
5. Galvanize- Chemical Brothers featuring Q-Tip
There are only so many Bud commercials I could take before buying this track. Nice to see Q-Tip back on top even if he is selling beer.
Inside Man
Spike Lee is an enigma wrapped inside a riddle. He can make great films like Do the Right Thing and bad ones like He Got Game. Gladly Inside Man is a positive. It’s almost too smart for it’s own good and further proves that Clive Owen is the new George Clooney. Seriously the man exudes cool. My only complaint was the trademark Spike shot of Denzel zooming past the background. It usually works in his films and is something he’ll be remembered for but it felt out of place in this flick. Jodi Foster is awesome with a capital A and the rest of the cast brings their A game. (please note the overuse of the letter A in the previous segment)
...Watching
The Soup on E!
I’ve always thought of The Soup as the lesser child of Best Week Ever but the more I watch it the more I crave it. Sure it might be behind the blog since it only airs once a week but it’s better written. I feel I’ve found a kindred spirit cause they seem to have the same save Brittney attitude that I do.
...Paying Money to see in a Theater
Snakes on a Plane
I’m not going to stop pimping this shit until you get off your lazy asses and see this thing. My local newspaper even stole my line about the characters being a cross between Airport and Airplane. If I’ve said it once I’ve said it a million times, if you like the very idea of snakes on a plane then this is the flick for you.
...Listening to
Top 5 on My iPod
1. Snakes on a Plane (Bring it)- Cobra Starship
Okay an obvious choice but the song is actually pretty good. The band is an all star “punk” band from the All American Rejects and their brethren. Add in two clips from the movie including “the line” and you’ve got a top10 hit.
2. Bossy- Kellis
I didn’t like it at first but even if you got white boy rhythm you can bounce to this track. I can’t believe she brought Too $hort out of hibernation to add a nice rap. Did I mention I’ve got an autographed picture of Too $hort?
3. L.O.V.E.- Ashlee Simpson
This was a total impulse buy after the season premiere of Laguna Beach but damn it if Ashlee can’t apply herself now and again.
4. Hungry Like The Wolf- Duran Duran
I have no idea what motivated this drunk download but thank the gods I now have some of the 80’s best pop band on my iPod.
5. Galvanize- Chemical Brothers featuring Q-Tip
There are only so many Bud commercials I could take before buying this track. Nice to see Q-Tip back on top even if he is selling beer.
Friday, August 18, 2006
I’ve Seen Snakes on a fucking Plane!
I’m writing this at 12:37am after just getting home from a 10pm Thursday screening of Snakes on a Plane so pardon me if my spelling and grammar is worse then normal. I’ve been jazzed for this film for months. The title is just so ridiculous is grabs you. Add Sam Jackson and the internet buzz and you had a cultural phenom. I even geeked out and bought a shirt on the internet. Of course I didn’t wear the shirt to the screening because that would be like wearing a Def Leppard shirt to a Def Leppard concert. But I digress. So the two big questions that have been floating around the last week are, is it any good and will anyone go see it?
First off yes it’s full of awesomely goodness. It was way better then it had any right to be. Now when I say good you have to put it in context. It’s good for what it is and that’s a grindhouse style B-movie with a bigger then normal budget. Is it Oscar worthy? Hell no. Is the acting top notch? Get the fuck out of here. It is what it is and it accepts it...no it excels at it. If I had to compare it I’d put it next to From Dusk til Dawn but it takes itself even less seriously. The opening credit sequence is absolutely horrible and you find yourself fearing for the film but it quickly rights itself soon after the director’s name fades from the screen. This is a movie that people will be quoting for years and I’m not just talking about “the line”, there are actually a ton of intentionally and unintentionally funny lines throughout. The snake attacks are appropriately vicious and the filmmakers have introduced the revolutionary camera technique of snake vision. Sam Jackson acts his pants off while seemingly joking on himself as well. We all know what Sam can do when he opens his mouth but the silent looks he gives throughout the film are what I’ll remember. The supporting cast is straight out of a 70’s disaster film. The writers clearly did their homework almost making a hybrid of Airport and the subsequent parody Airplane. Everybody gets their moment to shine one way or the other. It flys by at a running time of around 100 minutes and the ending shot will stay with you forever.
As to the question of will anyone go see it, the answer is a resounding yes, at least for opening weekend. While not sold out, my theater was 75% filled with people in every row straight to the front and I went to the second worst theater in my area. I can’t stress enough that you hit this flick opening weekend. Seeing the movie with a crowd of people who were jazzed to see it probably made the movie even better. During a trailer for some new Denzel Washington movie people started yelling, “needs more snakes.” Right there I knew this was diffenetly going to be an audience participation flick. From the clapping as the title showed to the first bit of roaring laughter at the Chinese mob boss the crowd was hot for SoaP. Everyone sang along to “the line” and it didn’t bother me a bit (I usually hate talking at a flick). People oooh and ahhhd at all the right moments and everyone stuck around for the credits which include a equally cheesy music video. Seriously if you have any interest in seeing SoaP see it at a theater or rent it with a bunch of friends that want to see it. I could see SoaP becoming a midnight movie at college campuses for many years to come.
Now that I’ve finally see it I can say the hype and anticipation were worth it. In fact I’ll probably see it again in the theater and I haven’t done that for any other films then the Star Wars series. If the very name of the movie makes you laugh then go see this film now. I swear if you go into it expecting snakes, planes, and one bad ass mutha fucka you won’t be dissapointed.
First off yes it’s full of awesomely goodness. It was way better then it had any right to be. Now when I say good you have to put it in context. It’s good for what it is and that’s a grindhouse style B-movie with a bigger then normal budget. Is it Oscar worthy? Hell no. Is the acting top notch? Get the fuck out of here. It is what it is and it accepts it...no it excels at it. If I had to compare it I’d put it next to From Dusk til Dawn but it takes itself even less seriously. The opening credit sequence is absolutely horrible and you find yourself fearing for the film but it quickly rights itself soon after the director’s name fades from the screen. This is a movie that people will be quoting for years and I’m not just talking about “the line”, there are actually a ton of intentionally and unintentionally funny lines throughout. The snake attacks are appropriately vicious and the filmmakers have introduced the revolutionary camera technique of snake vision. Sam Jackson acts his pants off while seemingly joking on himself as well. We all know what Sam can do when he opens his mouth but the silent looks he gives throughout the film are what I’ll remember. The supporting cast is straight out of a 70’s disaster film. The writers clearly did their homework almost making a hybrid of Airport and the subsequent parody Airplane. Everybody gets their moment to shine one way or the other. It flys by at a running time of around 100 minutes and the ending shot will stay with you forever.
As to the question of will anyone go see it, the answer is a resounding yes, at least for opening weekend. While not sold out, my theater was 75% filled with people in every row straight to the front and I went to the second worst theater in my area. I can’t stress enough that you hit this flick opening weekend. Seeing the movie with a crowd of people who were jazzed to see it probably made the movie even better. During a trailer for some new Denzel Washington movie people started yelling, “needs more snakes.” Right there I knew this was diffenetly going to be an audience participation flick. From the clapping as the title showed to the first bit of roaring laughter at the Chinese mob boss the crowd was hot for SoaP. Everyone sang along to “the line” and it didn’t bother me a bit (I usually hate talking at a flick). People oooh and ahhhd at all the right moments and everyone stuck around for the credits which include a equally cheesy music video. Seriously if you have any interest in seeing SoaP see it at a theater or rent it with a bunch of friends that want to see it. I could see SoaP becoming a midnight movie at college campuses for many years to come.
Now that I’ve finally see it I can say the hype and anticipation were worth it. In fact I’ll probably see it again in the theater and I haven’t done that for any other films then the Star Wars series. If the very name of the movie makes you laugh then go see this film now. I swear if you go into it expecting snakes, planes, and one bad ass mutha fucka you won’t be dissapointed.
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Runway Roundup Week 6 and Laguna Beach Bitchfest Week 1
Thank god for TiVo. Seriously Wednesday nights at 9pm CST are what TiVo was created for as you’ve got Runway and a whole new season of Laguna Beach.
First off Runway. How sad am I that Allison left? So very sad. Her pretty face gave me one gigantic manly excuse to watch Runway. Sure her outfit was bad but come on, at least she didn’t orgasm in her pants 3 times in an episode like Vincent. His outfit didn’t fit, he argued with the judges, and the man lacks any kind of taste. Allison has placed in the middle of the road of every competition while Vincent has been in the elimination line many a time. Plus, as I expected my favorite model the Katie Holmes clone who also happened to be named Katie got the big boot. Even though Jeffrey is an ass I was really pulling for him this week but Captain Save-A-Ho did a fine job so I can’t get too bent out of shape. The biggest news of the night was the continued bithcification of Laura. Now when she stated 34 times in the season opener that she was an architect I found her pretentious but now she’s just mean. I wished Vincent had left too but that did not give Laura the right to lay into him about his dress 2 seconds after the end of the competition. Don’t even get me started on the way she treated Kayne who has proven to be a far better designer then her. Jeffrey may be an ass but he was right on when he mocked Laura’s 5th straight high waisted dress. Also maybe I have a dirty mind but what girl in their right mind would want the words “for nuts only” written across her ass crack. Laura, please cover up your own breasts and get the fuck off my runway.
In all the anticipation of Snakes on a Plane I almost forgot this was Laguna Beach week too. Wednesday brought the premiere of season 3 of the show you hate to love. I must say the idea to focus on junior classmen was a stroke of genius by the producers because you guarantee yourself another season with the same cast. With that said I was a bit concerned how I’d handle meeting a whole new crew. Thankfully life solved that by throwing 20 year old Jessica from the previous seasons with one of the new vapid male castmates. The best part is that they had both Alexs and Taylor come back to scold Jessica for her cradle robbing. I tend to specialize in dating unstable women so Jessica if your ever looking to date an older man give me a call. Obviously it was also juicy to hear about Kristen’s (the star of last season) falling out with...well...everyone. Add the part where the old school bitches mocked Jason and LC for gaining weight on The Hills, and the show had me at hello. Let’s get onto the newbies though. Tessa clearly is playing the LC role to Kyndra’s Kristen (by the way do these parents even know how to spell a name it’s K-E-N-D-R-A). Cami, who made a fool of herself last season by going to prom with Jason, looks to be playing the 3rd sidekick role and LC’s sister seems to be on the show thanks only to her family pedigree. As long as the show keeps the influx of the old school into the new school I’ll certainly be signed up for a Season Pass for more drama then I can legally handle.
First off Runway. How sad am I that Allison left? So very sad. Her pretty face gave me one gigantic manly excuse to watch Runway. Sure her outfit was bad but come on, at least she didn’t orgasm in her pants 3 times in an episode like Vincent. His outfit didn’t fit, he argued with the judges, and the man lacks any kind of taste. Allison has placed in the middle of the road of every competition while Vincent has been in the elimination line many a time. Plus, as I expected my favorite model the Katie Holmes clone who also happened to be named Katie got the big boot. Even though Jeffrey is an ass I was really pulling for him this week but Captain Save-A-Ho did a fine job so I can’t get too bent out of shape. The biggest news of the night was the continued bithcification of Laura. Now when she stated 34 times in the season opener that she was an architect I found her pretentious but now she’s just mean. I wished Vincent had left too but that did not give Laura the right to lay into him about his dress 2 seconds after the end of the competition. Don’t even get me started on the way she treated Kayne who has proven to be a far better designer then her. Jeffrey may be an ass but he was right on when he mocked Laura’s 5th straight high waisted dress. Also maybe I have a dirty mind but what girl in their right mind would want the words “for nuts only” written across her ass crack. Laura, please cover up your own breasts and get the fuck off my runway.
In all the anticipation of Snakes on a Plane I almost forgot this was Laguna Beach week too. Wednesday brought the premiere of season 3 of the show you hate to love. I must say the idea to focus on junior classmen was a stroke of genius by the producers because you guarantee yourself another season with the same cast. With that said I was a bit concerned how I’d handle meeting a whole new crew. Thankfully life solved that by throwing 20 year old Jessica from the previous seasons with one of the new vapid male castmates. The best part is that they had both Alexs and Taylor come back to scold Jessica for her cradle robbing. I tend to specialize in dating unstable women so Jessica if your ever looking to date an older man give me a call. Obviously it was also juicy to hear about Kristen’s (the star of last season) falling out with...well...everyone. Add the part where the old school bitches mocked Jason and LC for gaining weight on The Hills, and the show had me at hello. Let’s get onto the newbies though. Tessa clearly is playing the LC role to Kyndra’s Kristen (by the way do these parents even know how to spell a name it’s K-E-N-D-R-A). Cami, who made a fool of herself last season by going to prom with Jason, looks to be playing the 3rd sidekick role and LC’s sister seems to be on the show thanks only to her family pedigree. As long as the show keeps the influx of the old school into the new school I’ll certainly be signed up for a Season Pass for more drama then I can legally handle.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Why does Rachel Ray suck?
I love food. I love restaurants. I love reading about restaurants and watching shows about restaurants. But try as I might, I can’t love Rachel Ray. Last night I gave her the 743rd try and sat down to watch her $40 A Day and Tasty Travels shows. After an hour of salivating and hurling I felt completely drained. The ideas for her shows are pure gold. Traveling on $40 a day is a great hook for anybody traveling plus its fun to watch towns and cities you’re familiar with be featured. Tasty Travels follows a similar path but puts the pocket book away and allows you to go buckwild. The problem with both shows is Rachel. Sure she’s soft on the old eyes but honestly her voice is like nails on a chalkboard. Personally I like to watch the show with closed captioning. Still a bigger problem is the fact that she is not a food critic. You never see her take a bite and make anything other than an O face. Just once I’d like to see her spit up or send something back. Plus the show is so staged it hurts. Now I know a little something about putting together a TV production and I understand that you can’t really book on the fly but it would be so refreshing to see Rachel try and navigate a restaurant that was already booked solid or to find a place that’s closed on Mondays. Real traveling means that you’re going to come across some misses along with your hits and that’s part of the journey. I’ve been to some of the places Rachel has orgasmed over and they just aren’t that good. There’s certainly a market for something like her shows but find a different host. Maybe Amanda Peet has a good palette.
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Updated: Now Three Early Fall TV Reviews
Last night I got to see 2 new fall shows so I thought I’d give some brief thoughts on each. The first was the premiere of the new Monday Night Football. As many of you know the broadcast has switched from ABC to ESPN. Al Michaels and John Madden apparently don’t do basic cable so the booth is now populated with Mike Tirico, Joe Theisman, and Tony Kornheiser and you know what, it works pretty well. The true test of a new broadcast team is a preseason football game. You’ve got about 5 minutes of compelling game play and over two hours of filler. These guys did a respectable job and they did without stepping all over each other. When I heard about the 3 man booth my initial thoughts went to the Michaels, Miller, Fouts debacle of the 90s but Kornheiser brought the funny while keeping it rooted in football. Theisman who can be extremely annoying seemed toned down and tempered by his broadcast mates. The big unknown is how Tirico will do in a true game moment. There is not much urgency you can bring to a preseason game but it’s a trait that’s required in regular season and playoff games. We’ll have to wait and see on that and if their low screen graphic will grow on me. Overall I think Monday Night Football is in good hands.
The second show I got to see is Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. Regular readers will know I’ve been touting this show since it’s announcement. When Netflix offered the chance to see the pilot episode early I jumped at the chance. Written and created by Aaron Sorkin (West Wing, Sports Night), Studio 60 goes behind the scenes of a Saturday Night Live type show. I’m happy to say my hype was well placed. Like all pilots the show is 90% set up and introduction but the characters are already more developed in 1 episode then most shows have after 2 seasons. Amanda Peet really captured my attention. Having never seen her deliver Sorkin type dialogue I was a little bit apprehensive about her playing a leading role but after 1 ep I’m already crushing on her something fierce. Matthew Perry and Bradley Whitford will make this show go and if anything they may dominate it too much. The guest stars in the pilot make the show as well. Getting to see Felicity Huffman spout Sorkin lines almost 10 years after Sports Night was a joy and Judd Hirsch plays an excellent Lorne Michels but with actual emotion. Now that I’ve actually seen the show I can say in all certainty this is the must watch show of the new season.
Oh and the funniest line of all comes not from the show but the behind the scenes featurette. DL Hughely, who plays one of the comedians on the show, shares the following nugget, “I’ve never really wanted to be an actor but this show makes me want to act. You can tell I never wanted to be an actor if you saw Soul Plane.” Ah Soul Plane humor it’s as timeless as the sand dunes in the Sahara.
Update: Just noticed my Studio 60 DVD also had the pilot for Kidnapped another new NBC drama. Think 24 mixed with Prison Break. It follows the kidnapping of a rich little kid whose parents played by Timothy Dalton and Dana Delaney turn to a super cool kidnapping specialist played by Jeremy Sisto. Add a dash of Delroy Lindo as an unwanted FBI agent and you've got an amazing cast. Shows like this can be problematic as you're expecting the audience to make it through the year to find out the mystery but I might have found new show #2. With top notch performances and a pilot that follows conventions but does so perfectly you can add Kidnapped to my list of new shows worth checking out.
The second show I got to see is Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. Regular readers will know I’ve been touting this show since it’s announcement. When Netflix offered the chance to see the pilot episode early I jumped at the chance. Written and created by Aaron Sorkin (West Wing, Sports Night), Studio 60 goes behind the scenes of a Saturday Night Live type show. I’m happy to say my hype was well placed. Like all pilots the show is 90% set up and introduction but the characters are already more developed in 1 episode then most shows have after 2 seasons. Amanda Peet really captured my attention. Having never seen her deliver Sorkin type dialogue I was a little bit apprehensive about her playing a leading role but after 1 ep I’m already crushing on her something fierce. Matthew Perry and Bradley Whitford will make this show go and if anything they may dominate it too much. The guest stars in the pilot make the show as well. Getting to see Felicity Huffman spout Sorkin lines almost 10 years after Sports Night was a joy and Judd Hirsch plays an excellent Lorne Michels but with actual emotion. Now that I’ve actually seen the show I can say in all certainty this is the must watch show of the new season.
Oh and the funniest line of all comes not from the show but the behind the scenes featurette. DL Hughely, who plays one of the comedians on the show, shares the following nugget, “I’ve never really wanted to be an actor but this show makes me want to act. You can tell I never wanted to be an actor if you saw Soul Plane.” Ah Soul Plane humor it’s as timeless as the sand dunes in the Sahara.
Update: Just noticed my Studio 60 DVD also had the pilot for Kidnapped another new NBC drama. Think 24 mixed with Prison Break. It follows the kidnapping of a rich little kid whose parents played by Timothy Dalton and Dana Delaney turn to a super cool kidnapping specialist played by Jeremy Sisto. Add a dash of Delroy Lindo as an unwanted FBI agent and you've got an amazing cast. Shows like this can be problematic as you're expecting the audience to make it through the year to find out the mystery but I might have found new show #2. With top notch performances and a pilot that follows conventions but does so perfectly you can add Kidnapped to my list of new shows worth checking out.
Sunday, August 13, 2006
Thoughts to start the week
Now that I'm more or less settled in from my move I should get back to some kind of regular blogging schedule. Here are some random thoughts that have come to me during my hiatus.
* I'm watching a preseason NFL game and something just seems off and then I realize its the refs. The new uniforms are not good. They look more like futbol jerseys then ref outfits. We need to send Captain Save-a-ho to NFL headquarters to fix this. From the video below it looks like the Packers really don’t like them.
* I should buy stock in Red Bull and Jagermeister.
* I'm a huge Public Enemy fan and I've got nothing against a man trying to make a living but good god get Flavor Flav off TV. Whatever positive contributions he made to society as part of PE are null and void thanks to the absolute trash that is Flavor of Love.
* Big Brother All Stars is getting more interesting ever since James stabbed his BB6 castmates in the back but I was so sad to see the first victim of his was Kaysar. I always wonder why it seems like idiots and jerks make up most reality show casts and I think it's because the honest nice people can't compete. Kaysar's been evicted 3 times in two seasons and its always been thanks to misplaced trust.
* It's Snakes on a Plane week people! After months of waiting we finally get to see Sam Jackson kick some snake ass. If you can't wait until Thursday night check out the "Get A Call From Sam Jackson" feature on the official website at snakesonaplane.com
* I'm watching a preseason NFL game and something just seems off and then I realize its the refs. The new uniforms are not good. They look more like futbol jerseys then ref outfits. We need to send Captain Save-a-ho to NFL headquarters to fix this. From the video below it looks like the Packers really don’t like them.
* I should buy stock in Red Bull and Jagermeister.
* I'm a huge Public Enemy fan and I've got nothing against a man trying to make a living but good god get Flavor Flav off TV. Whatever positive contributions he made to society as part of PE are null and void thanks to the absolute trash that is Flavor of Love.
* Big Brother All Stars is getting more interesting ever since James stabbed his BB6 castmates in the back but I was so sad to see the first victim of his was Kaysar. I always wonder why it seems like idiots and jerks make up most reality show casts and I think it's because the honest nice people can't compete. Kaysar's been evicted 3 times in two seasons and its always been thanks to misplaced trust.
* It's Snakes on a Plane week people! After months of waiting we finally get to see Sam Jackson kick some snake ass. If you can't wait until Thursday night check out the "Get A Call From Sam Jackson" feature on the official website at snakesonaplane.com
Thursday, August 10, 2006
MTV Curses Us With More Then Bad TV
It's a double post day as I've been delivered news that tears at my very soul. The MTV curse has struck two more couples. First came the news early this week that Travis Barker and his Playboy wife Shanna are splitsville and now the news that Jason and Lauren from The Hills are kaput. I think the most upsetting thing is that both of these happened off camera. Call me a jerk but if these so called celebs are going to prostitute their lives on TV then the least they can do is make sure the important stuff airs. I'm also troubled that this means the 2nd season of The Hills may be in jeopardy because really without badboy Jason around Lauren might actually make smart reasonable choices about her life. Jason brings the drama, Heidi brings the stupid, Lauren brings the "smarts", that's how the equation works, if you mess with that, you mess with perfection. Really the only relationships that have lasted on MTV have come from The Real World. Pam and Judd from the San Francisco cast are still going strong and Sean (Boston) and Rachel (San Fran) are expecting their 4th child. I guess the only relationships built to last are the ones that happen without MTVs prodding and pushing.
Runway Roundup: Week 5 Captain Save-a-ho Can't Save Brad
Last night might have been the best and worst of Runway this year. First off the challenge was awesome. Letting the models pick a fashion icon for the designers really made for an interesting task. This is why I love Runway above all reality shows. I get a lot of flack from my buddies about my love for the show but honestly the challenges and the contestants make this show 10 times better then The Apprentice, Hell's Kitchen, even Survivor. Anyway the challenge was great and I was so happy to see Michael (aka Captain Save-a-ho) win a challenge. I love Pam Grier and could totally see Foxy Brown kicking a little ass and making a little love in that number. Sadly though we lost Bradley. Perhaps Jeffrey described Bradley best when he noted that his outfit was supercalifragilisticexpealacrazy. He was the kind of crazy that everyone loves. Now that squid is out, and I just hope he finds his ocean.
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
I'm technology's bitch
The move has come and gone and I am now settled back into my new/old hometown. Everything went pretty well on the day of the move except for a flooded toilet here and there. Of course the first stuff to unpack was my electronics, so Sunday afternoon I began an ordeal that will haunt me to my last days....or at least a month or two.
As you may have noted in previous columns, I purchased a TiVo as part of the big move. In the past you needed a phone line to set up TiVo service but with their new Dual Tuner series you can set it up through your DSL or Broadband connection. This sealed the deal for me as I have no land line only DSL. When my internet provider came over on Friday I mentioned to him that I was going to have a TiVo in one room and my computer in the other. The tech guy (who was 3 zits away from looking like a Hollywood geek stereotype) explained to me what I needed in the following words, "You'll need a hub, only don't call it a hub when you go to Best Buy cause they'll laugh at you. Call it a switcher. I only call it a hub cause I kick it old school." With this sage advice I went to Best Buy picked up the SWITCHER and returned home. After making all the connections I got to the point in the TiVo set up where it connects to the net. No luck. Try again. No luck. Being Sunday I had to hold off until the morning to get help so I went to bed with thoughts of TiVo dancing in my head.
Now I consider myself a technologically accomplished person. I'm the guy that friends ask to help hook up their surround sound or program their cells phones. Monday changed my self perception and shook me to my very core. I woke up and called my internet provider who said I should be fine with the switcher and to call TiVo. TiVo talked to me for almost an hour and then told me that I needed a router not a switcher. I asked the girl if a router is the same as a hub and sure enough she laughed at me. So it was back to Best Buy to return the switcher and get the router. Being I was already getting confused I stopped a sales guy and had the following discussion.
Me: Hi I bought a switcher yesterday to split my DSL to my computer and my TiVo and apparently I needed a router?
Best Buy Guy: Who told you to get a switcher that's just ridiculous?
Me: I know tell me about it. Anyway will this router work with my Mac?
BBG: Mac? Are you kidding me, none of these routers work with a Mac, you have to go to the Mall and the Apple Store to get a compatible router. Give me that box and get out of here.
Confused and a little intimidated I stumbled across the street to the Apple Store and again sought out help. I asked for a router and the Apple Guy showed me a wireless system that was a wee bit too expensive for my taste. So I asked him about wired routers and was treated to this conversation.
Apple Guy: Wired routers? No you can just to go Best Buy for one of those.
Me: I did and they sent me here.
Apple Guy: Because you wanted wireless?
Me: No because they said only Apple sells compatible routers for Macs.
Apple Guy: Wow, that's messed up. You can use any router on a Mac. So unless you want to spend $150 on a wireless system get out of our store.
Now I was out for a wired router once again but I didn't want to go back to Best Buy and face the same salesperson so I went off to CompUSA. CompUSA seemed like a good choice because there was no way I'd face contradictory information since they never have sales people available. I picked up a router and returned home.
As I began to arrange cords and what not, I had a positive outlook that after all the confusion and contradiction my journey was at an end. I powered up the TiVo and went back at it. Now I was getting two error messages so back to TiVo I went. This time they were as lost as I was (which always feels good) they suggested another brand of router. By now my Monday was shot so back to sleep I went dreaming of my old cable DVR.
Tuesday came and back to CompUSA I went. After exchanging routers I gave it another try and still no luck. This time TiVo suggested I take the box to a friends place that has a phone line and lie to the machine that it's at home. I packed it up took it to my mom's place and voile the set up worked. However I was petrified that it wouldn't work at home and honestly now matter how much I paid TiVo for a 3 year contract I wasn't going to drive to and from my mom's place every two weeks to update my programming schedule. I got home and turned off everything, computer, router, modem, TV, TiVo and then plugged it all in and presto it dialed out on my network perfectly. I called TiVo and they pretty much said it was an act of God. If there is a God I guess I find it rather comforting that he's looking out for me and my TV addiction. Let the TiVolution begin!
As you may have noted in previous columns, I purchased a TiVo as part of the big move. In the past you needed a phone line to set up TiVo service but with their new Dual Tuner series you can set it up through your DSL or Broadband connection. This sealed the deal for me as I have no land line only DSL. When my internet provider came over on Friday I mentioned to him that I was going to have a TiVo in one room and my computer in the other. The tech guy (who was 3 zits away from looking like a Hollywood geek stereotype) explained to me what I needed in the following words, "You'll need a hub, only don't call it a hub when you go to Best Buy cause they'll laugh at you. Call it a switcher. I only call it a hub cause I kick it old school." With this sage advice I went to Best Buy picked up the SWITCHER and returned home. After making all the connections I got to the point in the TiVo set up where it connects to the net. No luck. Try again. No luck. Being Sunday I had to hold off until the morning to get help so I went to bed with thoughts of TiVo dancing in my head.
Now I consider myself a technologically accomplished person. I'm the guy that friends ask to help hook up their surround sound or program their cells phones. Monday changed my self perception and shook me to my very core. I woke up and called my internet provider who said I should be fine with the switcher and to call TiVo. TiVo talked to me for almost an hour and then told me that I needed a router not a switcher. I asked the girl if a router is the same as a hub and sure enough she laughed at me. So it was back to Best Buy to return the switcher and get the router. Being I was already getting confused I stopped a sales guy and had the following discussion.
Me: Hi I bought a switcher yesterday to split my DSL to my computer and my TiVo and apparently I needed a router?
Best Buy Guy: Who told you to get a switcher that's just ridiculous?
Me: I know tell me about it. Anyway will this router work with my Mac?
BBG: Mac? Are you kidding me, none of these routers work with a Mac, you have to go to the Mall and the Apple Store to get a compatible router. Give me that box and get out of here.
Confused and a little intimidated I stumbled across the street to the Apple Store and again sought out help. I asked for a router and the Apple Guy showed me a wireless system that was a wee bit too expensive for my taste. So I asked him about wired routers and was treated to this conversation.
Apple Guy: Wired routers? No you can just to go Best Buy for one of those.
Me: I did and they sent me here.
Apple Guy: Because you wanted wireless?
Me: No because they said only Apple sells compatible routers for Macs.
Apple Guy: Wow, that's messed up. You can use any router on a Mac. So unless you want to spend $150 on a wireless system get out of our store.
Now I was out for a wired router once again but I didn't want to go back to Best Buy and face the same salesperson so I went off to CompUSA. CompUSA seemed like a good choice because there was no way I'd face contradictory information since they never have sales people available. I picked up a router and returned home.
As I began to arrange cords and what not, I had a positive outlook that after all the confusion and contradiction my journey was at an end. I powered up the TiVo and went back at it. Now I was getting two error messages so back to TiVo I went. This time they were as lost as I was (which always feels good) they suggested another brand of router. By now my Monday was shot so back to sleep I went dreaming of my old cable DVR.
Tuesday came and back to CompUSA I went. After exchanging routers I gave it another try and still no luck. This time TiVo suggested I take the box to a friends place that has a phone line and lie to the machine that it's at home. I packed it up took it to my mom's place and voile the set up worked. However I was petrified that it wouldn't work at home and honestly now matter how much I paid TiVo for a 3 year contract I wasn't going to drive to and from my mom's place every two weeks to update my programming schedule. I got home and turned off everything, computer, router, modem, TV, TiVo and then plugged it all in and presto it dialed out on my network perfectly. I called TiVo and they pretty much said it was an act of God. If there is a God I guess I find it rather comforting that he's looking out for me and my TV addiction. Let the TiVolution begin!
Thursday, August 03, 2006
Runway Roundup: Week 4(Holy Crap Hiatus Edition)
Just some quick thoughts on last night's “historic” Project Runway.
* If I had a pool going on which designer was going to be asked to leave the heavy money would have been on the correct person. They just screamed cheater. While it did make for decent television, you knew that the actual event would be a bit of a let down after the weeks of anticipation.
* I've spent the last few days introducing my mother to the joys of Runway thanks to the incessant reruns on Bravo and after the first two episodes she turned to me and said "They're only keeping that Angela around because she's so bad." Of course I agreed but after last night they can actually legitimately keep her around. Now without poor Michael and Laura I think the outcome would have been much different. I actually was cheering for them to shut up and let her cover the whole thing in those stupid fucking rosettes.
* Bradley has leaped to the forefront of my favorite contestants. His nonsensical self talk gets better and better every week. Take this nugget from last night's show; “I’m a squid without an ocean.” There was also some discussion about his beard being responsible for Bonnie’s attitude towards him. Now that's how I like my crazy.
* If I had a pool going on which designer was going to be asked to leave the heavy money would have been on the correct person. They just screamed cheater. While it did make for decent television, you knew that the actual event would be a bit of a let down after the weeks of anticipation.
* I've spent the last few days introducing my mother to the joys of Runway thanks to the incessant reruns on Bravo and after the first two episodes she turned to me and said "They're only keeping that Angela around because she's so bad." Of course I agreed but after last night they can actually legitimately keep her around. Now without poor Michael and Laura I think the outcome would have been much different. I actually was cheering for them to shut up and let her cover the whole thing in those stupid fucking rosettes.
* Bradley has leaped to the forefront of my favorite contestants. His nonsensical self talk gets better and better every week. Take this nugget from last night's show; “I’m a squid without an ocean.” There was also some discussion about his beard being responsible for Bonnie’s attitude towards him. Now that's how I like my crazy.
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Hiatus Thoughts on Unemployment
I used to love being unemployed. Back in college I'd always wait as long as financially possible to find a summer job after my school year job ended. After college I have a particularly fond memory of a 3 month period where I interned at Mystery Science Theater 3000 and boozed it up in my parent’s basement. In recent years I've even found myself jealous when some of my friends have gone on the old unemployment train. So now, knee deep in moving I find myself unemployed and I'm finding it's not all I remember it to be. Of course the fact that I'm not moving in to my new place until Saturday and am currently residing with my family could have something to do with my perspective. With that said, here are a few pros and cons I've noticed about being unemployed.
PRO: Plenty of time to set up the important utilities for new apartment...TiVo and internet. That's right folks I'll finally be able to legitimately say I TiVo'd a show last night. The DVR I had in Madison was great but it always felt weird saying I MOXI'd something last night.
CON: Have time to research the pros and cons of TiVo versus DVR.
PRO: Have time to shop for new things for the apartment at Ikea. I must say that while the Ikea experience does tend to lose something after you've been there 4 times in the last year, there is still something special about seeing $1.99 slippers for sale next to a leather couch. Plus who doesn't love trying to decipher the cave drawing inspired instructions Ikea provides with their furniture.
CON: Have time to buy plenty of new things for apartment when no job is in sight. It's amazing how quickly a bunch of $4.99 items can add up.
PRO: Plenty of opportunities to spend time with Mom. One of my reasons for moving back was to spend more quality time with my small family.
CON: Difficult to spend quality time when most of it is spent explaining the various rules to reality shows. Also, like all moms, I'm being feed way too well. I must be the only person gaining weight in 103 degree weather.
PRO: Lots of time to catch up on movies.
CON: Talladega Nights doesn’t come out until Friday and Miami Vice supposedly blows.
PRO: Able to sit back and organize life.
CON: Have finally found point where even I get bored making lists.
PRO: With no job, have plenty of time to update blog.
CON: Blog sounds like desperate cry for help instead of entertaining diversion.
PRO: Able to search YouTube for timely pop culture related humor.
PRO: Plenty of time to set up the important utilities for new apartment...TiVo and internet. That's right folks I'll finally be able to legitimately say I TiVo'd a show last night. The DVR I had in Madison was great but it always felt weird saying I MOXI'd something last night.
CON: Have time to research the pros and cons of TiVo versus DVR.
PRO: Have time to shop for new things for the apartment at Ikea. I must say that while the Ikea experience does tend to lose something after you've been there 4 times in the last year, there is still something special about seeing $1.99 slippers for sale next to a leather couch. Plus who doesn't love trying to decipher the cave drawing inspired instructions Ikea provides with their furniture.
CON: Have time to buy plenty of new things for apartment when no job is in sight. It's amazing how quickly a bunch of $4.99 items can add up.
PRO: Plenty of opportunities to spend time with Mom. One of my reasons for moving back was to spend more quality time with my small family.
CON: Difficult to spend quality time when most of it is spent explaining the various rules to reality shows. Also, like all moms, I'm being feed way too well. I must be the only person gaining weight in 103 degree weather.
PRO: Lots of time to catch up on movies.
CON: Talladega Nights doesn’t come out until Friday and Miami Vice supposedly blows.
PRO: Able to sit back and organize life.
CON: Have finally found point where even I get bored making lists.
PRO: With no job, have plenty of time to update blog.
CON: Blog sounds like desperate cry for help instead of entertaining diversion.
PRO: Able to search YouTube for timely pop culture related humor.
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