First Impressions: The City

It was bound to happen that MTV’s pop culture black hole The Hills would have a spinoff. Surprisingly it took over 4 seasons and it centers on one of the least seen, most “normal” characters. While Speidi create attention getting false storylines on their own, and Audrina becomes dumber by the minute, little old Whitney Port has wound up with the spinoff prize in The City.

Next to LC’s number one confidant Lo, Whitney was my fav on The Hills. Her exaggerated facial expressions while listening to the absolute drivel that is Lauren’s life was entertaining all on its own. Furthermore, Whitney often seemed like she had a life outside of Lauren’s and that she actually cared about the non-TV career she was working in. All these factors made me think we’d never see Whitney get a show, but when MTV or her own merits, secured her a position with Diane von Furstenberg, off to the big scary city she went…and I couldn’t wait to follow.

However, now that I’ve been able to digest the first hour of Whitney’s adventures in The City aka NYC, I’m feeling a bit ambivalent. It’s just odd to see Whitney in the lead roll and her obvious dedication to work makes it a little more difficult to fit in as much drama as her Hills co-stars. Still we were introduced to some potential troublemakers in the pilot. First off, we got society girl Olivia who clearly despises Whit-Whit and her LA ways. Then we get Jay, Whitney’s instant love interest whom she met last season on The Hills. Jay certainly has a potential to be as disgustingly laughable as JustinBobby but right now he falls more in the Brody/Doug column as just gross and boring. Balding model Alex stopped by to start some trouble and I couldn’t help but think poor Whitney didn’t know what she agreed to when she let MTV write her life. There are a few other folks floating about like useless couch provider Erin, who’s clearly supposed to be playing the Whitney-role, and Adam, Jay’s roommate, who apparently only sees him once a week so they can discuss Whitney.

I think the most troublesome aspect is that everyone except Whitney seems to know everyone else (NYC is a small town after all). It’s as if MTV “cast” this group and then figured out which outsider they could drop in to their midst. The first few eps of The Hills though was similarly problematic as viewers were left asking who’s this Audrina lady and when did Heidi become LC’s best friend? We can only hope that the drama these folks cook up is as rewarding as what we got out of those then strangers.

Quick Wii Review: Rock Band 2

I am a product loyalist to a fault. As a kid, I stuck with Coke through the New Coke fiasco. I stick with bad shows like Heroes. You really don’t have to look any further than my incomprehensible loyalty to the Minnesota Vikings (yesterday’s victory notwithstanding). Therefore, it wasn’t even a question to me which music game sequel I’d buy this year between Guitar Hero World Tour and Rock Band 2. Guitar Hero III and Guitar Hero Aerosmith had treated me very well and they had been the first music games to hit the Wii. The way I figured it, they deserved my loyalty. Now after playing Rock Band 2 for a couple of days I think my loyalty was misplaced.

Released for the Wii just last week, Rock Band 2 sweetened its appeal right off the bat by declaring that it was compatible with Guitar Hero World Tour instruments. There’s no way I’d have purchased the game if I had to drop another $190 bucks on drums, guitars, and mics. The fact that Rock Band 2 realized they were coming to the party late and had enough foresight to anticipate the gripes of people like myself, was encouraging. For those that have lived under a rock, the game play is identical to GH; strum your guitar, beat your drum, hit your pitch. No matter which game you’re playing this is the meat of your music game sandwich and both deliver. However, Rock Band 2 beats GH to a bloody mess when it comes to all the stuff in between. The graphics are astonishingly better for one. Rock Band 2 pushes the Wii graphic envelope for a game of this type and the results are appreciated. The layout of the screen is also a dramatic improvement over its competitor. The meter, star/overdrive indicator, and point totals are laid out in a way where all band members can see and understand them clearly. Meanwhile, even the menu navigation puts GH to shame. The create-a-character aspect is far deeper and the song list is even longer. The only thing I can’t weigh in on are the instruments themselves but I’m happy to report that the GH instrument compatibility is definitely all there.
To put it plainly Rock Band 2 kicks Guitar Hero World Tour’s ass in every way possible.

Top 5 Movies of 2008

Most Disappointing (tie): Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and my lack of movie viewing
If the latest Indiana Jones movie featured characters that resembled ones from the past movies and didn’t have the words Indiana or Jones in the title than it would have missed a spot on this list good or bad. Truthfully, the movie was forgettable fun much like the first installment of the Mummy franchise. I certainly wouldn’t have run out to catch it but if it came on TV, I would have given it a shot. Unfortunately, since it was one of the most anticipated movies of the summer and the first new Indy adventure in over a decade, it was saddled with expectations. Some might say those expectations were unwarranted but damn it all, this is Indiana Jones and I want to see him act like Indiana frakking Jones.

My other big disappointment is in myself. While I’ve certainly become more of a TV person than a film person over the last few years, this was a new low in viewership. As I write this, I think it’s a damn good thing that 5 of the 10+ movies I saw this year were of outstanding quality or I wouldn’t even have a list.

5. Burn After Reading
I might be reaching by putting this on my top 5 list because the latest Cohen brother’s flick didn’t stick with me, but in the moment, this was one of the best experiences of the year. The mix of farce and slapstick keeps the audience on their toes and Brad Pitt, hair and all, further develops himself as one of our great actors.

4. Tropic Thunder
If not for Heath Ledger, I whole-heartedly believe that Robert Downey Jr. would be the deserving favorite for this year’s Best Supporting Actor Oscar. His portrayal of a true method actor in Tropic Thunder is so layered and so intense that it almost feels out of place in this insider comedy. I think the reason it works though is that this film is funny as hell. In an age of Apatow-mania, Ben Stiller reminds us that comedies don’t have to about sex and relationships; they can also be about mocking each other and ourselves. While I thought there was a little too much of him, you have to give Tom Cruise credit for pulling off his role as a studio head. Likewise, Jack Black should be given similar credit for finding the funny again and being selective about his choice of movies. I’m not a Stiller fan as an actor but he really knows how to direct comedy as this opus proves.

3. Hellboy II- The Golden Army
I want to take Guillermo Del Toro behind the bleachers and get him pregnant. That is how much I love this man’s films. While I was put off by Pan’s Labyrinth, I still find it to be a film I’m fascinated by and love to discuss. I think his studio work is amazing going back to the underappreciated Blade II. Hellboy was a good melding of studio desires with his aesthetics and Hellboy II expands on that and is a perfect marriage. Just an unbelievably beautiful film with humor and drama.

2. Iron Man
Hands down the greatest comic book movie ever. I love the first two X Men, and the new Batman flicks (see below) but this movie is the finest adaptation of a comic book I’ve ever witnessed. It was as if the pages came to life. Robert Downey Jr. was a spot on Tony Stark and for the first time I found an origin story to be truly engrossing. I’ve never been much of an Iron Man fan since he’s sort of the anti Bruce Wayne but if every adventure he has is as fun as this one, then count me in. Oh and by the way, I hope everyone has noticed the Jon Favreau is developing into one of our finest studio directors. Lastly, you have to give props to Marvel who is finally acknowledging the benefit of tying their film universe together.

1.(tie) The Dark Knight and Wall-E
If Iron Man was the best comic book movie of the year than where does that leave Batman and his second, second outing? In my mind, it leaves it as the best picture of the year. Sure, it is based on an iconic comic book hero but I found myself getting lost in the world director Chris Nolan has created. I hardly found myself referencing his first outstanding foray into Gotham, Batman Begins, let alone the hundreds of comic book stories I’ve read. Heath Ledger turned in the performance of the year and the rest of the cast shined. It was a stunning commentary on our society and a philosophical thinker. Plus, things blowed up real good.

Wall-E gave an equally stunning commentary on our society and did so in a completely different way. Pixar hit a home run yet again but did it by poking fun and by poking society's collective fat ass. The first mostly silent 30 minutes is the kind of film making that leaves your jaw firmly planted on the floor. Not only was it the best animated picture of the year but I truly believe it deserves a best picture nomination as well.

Looking Ahead to 2009: Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince
I hate Twilight and I hate Warner Brothers. Did they move Harry because they were afraid of box office competition from the vegan vamps or was it simply a budget move? Either way it sucks worse than Twilight that we have to wait until next summer. Worse yet the final book adaptation, split into two movies, probably won’t hit the screens until 2010 and 2011 respectively. All that disappointment aside, I cannot wait to see the dark tones of the sixth book on the big screen.

Top 5 Restaurant Meals of 2008

Most Disappointing: Chinese Food in Madison
Another year in Madison and another year without a decent twice-cooked pork or kung pao chicken. I started the year with such hope for Tom’s Red Pepper but was utterly disappointed. Then I heard great things about the chef at China Palace but he took off for greener pastures in Chicago. I’ve pretty much given up on ever finding good Szechuan in town and settling for the multitude of excellent ethnic restaurants we have.

5. Liliana’s
A breath of fresh air in suburban Madison, Liliana’s brings Creole flavor to the table while moderating the spice. I might be a spicy food enthusiast but I enjoy flavor most of all. Whether it was the hushpuppies flecked with jalapeno and cranberries or the layered flavors of the etoufee, Liliana’s exceeded expectations at every corner.
Liliana’s, 2951 Triverton Pike, Fitchburg, WI (608) 442-4444

4. Humpy’s
This Anchorage bar/restaurant was the first stop on our trip to Alaska and perhaps the most memorable. Their halibut fish and chips were fried perfectly. The fish was fresh and absorbed all the fried goodness and the fries were above average. We also had some mini King Crab cakes. A nice mix of crab and filler these dandies came with a great garlic aioli. Plus, this began a weekend where I got to sample many great micro brews.
Humpy's, 610 West 6th Avenue, Anchorage, Alaska USA, (907)276-BEER

3. El Dorado Grill
Sometimes I wish I could live at the El Dorado Grill. On Sundays in 2008, I practically did. Their Sunday brunch is the best in town. The banana pecan pancakes are the best cakes in town especially when paired with chile butter. The vegetable chilaquilas are my favorite breakfast dish of the year as the layers of cheese, veggies and tortillas melt together in your mouth. Throw in excellent sides of potatoes and beans and you’ve got the whole deal. Oh wait, I almost forgot about the best god damn Bloody Mary in town. Their Killer Bloody Murder features their house-made chili vodka and provides the perfect kick to your morning. A recent take out order from their BBQ smokehouse only furthered their standing as one of my favorites.
El Dorado Grill, 744 Williamson St, Madison, WI, 608-280-WEST

2. The Strip Club
Every dish at this St. Paul establishment was a culinary adventure. The rib eye special with avocado butter and roasted pumpkin might be the best dish I had all year. The pumpkin soup was by far the soup of the year and the venison wrapped in pancetta causes me to salivate just by thinking about it. Located outside of downtown in the Dayton’s Bluff area, The Strip Club is by far the best restaurant I visited in the Twin Cities last year and a culinary delight all should be lucky enough to enjoy.
The Strip Club, 378 Maria Avenue St Paul, MN 651-793-6247

1. Fresco
You know a restaurant is great when they can take an ingredient you don’t care for and make it shine. Fresco did just that with their beet salad by making the locally raised beets sing in my mouth. The various textures and tastes were a theme in the Fresco dishes I experienced. The halibut dish served in a spring lemon beurre blanc was amazing and their deserts were to die for. The seasonal menu always highlights the best local ingredients and chef John Jerabek does amazing work with them.
Fresco, 227 State St, Madison, WI, 608-663-7374

Looking Forward to 2009: Sonic comes to Madison
I know it's not a new gourmet restaurant opening but in light of the recession this actually makes sense. Drive-in king Sonic finally comes to our area after invading the Twin Cities in 2008. Their smoothies are addictive and their burgers devine (at least on a fast food scale).

Top 5 Narrative TV Shows of 2008

Most Disappointing: Heroes
I’m so fucking tired of writing about how Heroes went wrong, yet I’m still watching it. A large chunk of my continued viewing could be chalked up to my partner still enjoying the show but the truth is I’m also stubbornly holding out hope. This season alone we’ve seen the show ask us to invest in new ideas (reformed Sylar) only to throw them out the window. You have a show runner who calls the viewers idiots and a writing staff in transition. The only good news is that the best writer the show ever had looks to be coming back now that show #5 got the ax.

5. Pushing Daisies
Speaking of the saddest cancellation of the year, let’s take a moment and praise one of the best-looking show since HDTV was introduced. Never have your eyes experienced such an adventure as Pushing Daisies. Week in and week out the cinematography and art design are truly breathtaking. On top of that, you had some of the best writing, acting and occasionally singing on TV. It’s a damn shame that ABC has given up on Brain Fuller’s latest creation and an even worse debacle that the show is going to end without any resolution. In the meantime, let’s just enjoy our pie while we have it.

4. Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Now that the show has been given an order for two more seasons, I can finally rest on my viewership campaign. Thankfully, the creators of Sunny did not rest and continued to break every rule of decency on TV. The musical finale of The Nightman Cometh is permanently etched in my mind along with dusters, Ty Pennington, Sinbad and of course, “Wild Card Bitches!”

3. Battlestar Galactica
Was the first half of Battlestar’s final season inconsistent? Oh hell yeah but it was also hella entertaining. The finale left you completely stunned and wondering how the hell are they going to wrap this thing up in early 09. I was struck again, at how amazing this show looks compared to every other weekly sci-fi show. It’s literally like watching a weekly movie.

2. 30 Rock
While the show is in danger of becoming the new Will & Grace with all the guest stars, it clearly stands heads and heads above the rest of the comedy world. What’s amazing is that for every Steve Martin appearance that feels forced, there’s a Jennifer Aniston or Oprah appearance that boggles the mind at how good it is. Never mind the fact that the core performers continue to put on a clinic in comedy 101. Witness the recent episode with Jack and Liz at a high school reunion while Tracy and Jenna compete with Kenneth for laughs. Each individual kept the A and B story on the front burner so much that you couldn’t distinguish which is which.

1. Lost
Frozen donkey wheel and all, this season not only solidified Lost as my favorite show but also moved it into competition with Buffy and Twin Peaks as my favorite of all time. With only 48 eps left the show jumped in with both feet in 2008 and answered a few questions while posing hundreds of more intriguing ones. Only down side is that we only get it for half of the year.

Looking Ahead to 2009: Dollhouse
Dollhouse, the new show from Joss Whedon, was the featured item in my looking forward to 2008 column last year. Well after some scheduling changes, reshoots, and a bunch of doom and gloom Dollhouse now is a repeat offender. I’m still so excited to have Joss’ work back on my TV that I could care less about a new pilot, a kiss of death Friday night time slot, and reported network interference. Nope I’m just happy to have my Joss and you all better get ready for my own get out the viewers campaign for the show come February.

Top 5 Reality Shows of 2008

Most Disappointing: Top Design
I waited an eternity for Bravo! to bring back Top Design and what I got was hot reworked mess. Todd Oldham was still there and so was judge Kelly Wearstler but they seemed awfully toned down (especially Kelly’s insane sense of style). The show was predictable and in the end left me completely befuddled as to why I wanted it to come back in the first place.

5. Design Star
I must admit I was a non-believer in this show to start with. Unlike Top Design, which features designers using the maximum resources to create their looks, Star looked like a bunch of TV wannabees. Turns out this was true but it didn’t mean the show wasn’t a hell of a lot more fun. Who can forget Michael crying for his mama or the weekly tension with Tracy? So while I wouldn’t let any of these hacks refinish my house, I’d gladly watch them dance for Vern Yip.

4. Survivor
Loved the spring installment but haven’t been crazy about Gabon. That’s ok though as Survivor still manages to be appointment reality and it shows no signs of letting down. While the category may be laughable, I was very pleased to see Probst take home a well-deserved Emmy for Reality hosting. His transformation over the years from play by play man to color commentator has been fascinating to watch.


3. Project Runway
Two seasons (well technically 1 and 1/3) in one year made Elliot a happy boy. Seeing my favorites Leanne and Christian take home the top honors makes made me even happier. Sure the challenges continued to decline, but the idea of never seeing Tim and Heidi again due to the Bravo!/Lifetime lawsuits, makes me so sad I want to cry on my form’s shoulder.

2. Top Chef
An alarming dip in quality from the new season in NYC prevents Top Chef from taking the top spot for the second year in a row, however the show still tops its Bravo! brethren. Padma and company owned Chicago and it made for the best season yet. Of all the food shows on TV this continues to be the best…as long as they pick up the pace in New York.

1.The Hills
A year ago, I could not have fathomed that The Hills would end up as my number one reality show of 2008. We as a nation, seemed to be suffering from laurenopecia, which is defined as the excessive viewing of bored Lauren looks on TV. Thankfully, the cast (and the writers) got busy and cooked up a gigantic pot of drama that seems to be never ending. For those of us that were so done with the Lauren/Heidi fight we got siblings. For those of us bored with Audrina we got a decent into madness…on a bike driven by JustinBobby. Whitney kept making those amazing facial expressions and even got herself some screen time. Brody was exposed as the consummate TV idiot. Spencer is the devil and still wore the flesh colored beard to prove it. Best of all, Lauren’s best reality friend, Lo booked some serious time by moving in with the girls and giving us plenty of straight truth. I can’t believe I’m saying this but I hope to hell The Hills comes back for another season.

Looking Ahead to 2009: The CityIf The Hills falls by the wayside, we still have hope in The City. Yes, the eventual spin-off is here and thankfully, it’s not centered on Speidi. Whitney is off to NYC with a cast full of models and fashion workers. How will she survive away from Lauren? Will she find enough douche bags in NYC to remind her of home? Which friend that she’s known for two weeks betrays her and causes her to break down? I don’t know but I can’t wait.

Top 5 Albums of 2008

Most Disappointing: The Fratellis- Here We Stand
Just a completely forgettable follow up to their great first effort. The great pop hits just aren’t here. Boring to listen to and an album I even forgot I had.

5. Madonna- Hard Candy
While it doesn’t hold up so well after multiple listens, Madge’s latest was still a success. Justin and Timberland did a lot of the heavy lifting and it made for the best single of the year in “4 Minutes.”

4. Mates of State- Re-Arrange Us
“My Only Offer” might be my second favorite song of 2008. Their simple piano/drum interplay is buoyed by blaring horns that fill the sonic sphere. Almost every track features the quick pace and musical excitement that define this eclectic duo.

3. The Killers- Day and Age
While I’ve only had a few days to listen to it, The Killers latest is their finest work. “Dustland Fairytale” and “Spaceman” are currently in my top rotation. While their sound is still there, it certainly shows growth.

2. Britney Spears- Circus
It’s Britney bitch. I just reviewed this so I’m repeating myself but clearly, Britney is not only back but she’s better then ever. She’s focusing on dance music that is happy and sexy. Is she fixed? Probably not but at least she’s making good music again.

1. Dillinger Four- C I V I L W A R
Six years is a long time to wait for an album but the Minneapolis punkers made the wait worthwhile. The sound is cleaner but it’s a good difference. The longer I listen to it the more I’m coming to the opinion that my favorite band might just be hitting their stride instead of aging into obscurity.

Looking Ahead to 2009: More Guns N’ Roses?
Rumor is that Axl Rose has two more albums worth of material to unleash on us. After listening to Chinese Democracy that would be just fine with me. Sure, the album is overworked and full of faults but it was also damn intriguing and I’m ready for more.

I Refuse to Call Them Cheftestants: Week 5

A few weeks prior to the new season of Top Chef, I lamented the fact that I was going to have to miss one to two weeks of recaps here on the blog due to some personal events. After watching last night’s episode, another lack luster effort from both show and chefs, I’m actually looking forward to taking a break the next two Wednesdays.

As usual let’s start with the Quickfire challenge. In an effort to freshen things up there was a change to the annual pallet battle. Instead of an individual sampling we got head-to-head match ups in the style of Name That Tune. A good idea, but once again one that wasn’t fully flushed out for the viewer. When Josea went up against Danny in round one, I had no earthly idea what was going on. Throw on top of that the conservative play of the chefs and you had a very bland opening challenge. It strikes me that immunity should mean more to these folks but giving up at 5 ingredients, that’s just lazy. It was a little surprising to see Stefan lose to Josea but at that point, I just didn’t care.

The Elimination Challenge this week was yet another catering based event. I’m tired of them cooking 45 plates to be served at once and the endless worries that go with that. So the twist this time around is that the event was for one the regular judges, as Gail was having her bridal shower. The event was as rigid and boring as the ambiance in that banquet room. The chef drew knives this week but I would like to see them work together more on the overall menu. I mean how did the tomato appetizers feed into the make your own sushi dish? In seasons past, the teams have worked to provide an overall progression in a meal and if I were Gail, I’d be pissed at Bravo! for giving my guests such a craptacular meal. Oh and what a craptacular meal it was. While I thought the apps and the lamb dish looked good and fit their themes, I found nothing interesting or creative about them. The blue team with their sea bass was so disappointing. Even if the flavors were strong, you have to question their thinking behind the dish. The make your own sushi team should have all gone home. That looked horrible from the start and smacked of Old Country Buffett’s interpretation of sushi. Glad Danny finally went home. He clearly got on the show thanks to his personality and not his pallet.

The only thing right now that’s keeping me going on this show is the judges table. Tom has really sharpened his verbal knives this year and with good reason. This might be the least qualified or exciting group of chefs the show has ever seen. We are not even to the halfway point and while we’ve got some individual stand out dishes, no chef has truly distinguished themselves on a week in/week out basis.

Quick Book Review: Tales of Beedle the Bard

A quick review is honestly all that’s needed when it comes to JK Rowling’s collection of fables from the wizarding world of Harry Potter. With five stories, and a collection of notes by Hogwart’s finest headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, the page-turner clocks in at a mere 111 pages. Hardly the time sucker that was the Order of the Phoenix. Originally written for charity, Rowling immediately brings the Potter fan back into the world some of us miss quite dearly (especially with the delay in the release of the Half Blood Prince movie). I can just picture Mollywobbles reading these tales to a young Ron or Ginny. I even found myself thinking about the day when I can share the tale of Babbity Rabbity and her Cackling Stump with a young witch or wizard of my own. These tales are certainly good reading for any young folk and doubly so for any Potter fan. The Warlock’s Hairy Heart and The Tale of the Three Brothers might be best kept for kids who have read through at least Goblet of Fire. Actually this one tiny book encapsulates all that Rowling does well. She adjust the tales to fit the ages of her reader’s as they grow and she makes a magical world seem both magical and identifiable all at the same time.

Madison Take Out Review: El Dorado Smokehouse

If I’ve been identified as a whore for Joss Whedon thanks to this blog then I think I’m about to be identified as one for Kevin Tubb as well. I’m a huge fan of the king of southwest food in Madison. His El Dorado Grill features the best damn brunch in Madison and his Killer Bloody Mary is the drink gods dream about. His smaller, more inexpensive off shots, Tex Tubb’s Taco Palace on the East and near West side are my favorite options for relatively cheap eats. I even got his cookbook last year for Chrismukah and have hosted a couple of dinner parties utilizing his recipes. So with all that said, you can imagine my joy, as a self-professed BBQ-holic, at the news that he was doing smokehouse takeout from the El Dorado. It took me a few months to get my ducks in a row but my partner and I enjoyed a meal this weekend that will only add to Tubb’s legacy.

Since this weekend fell between our two birthdays, we decided to do it up right and order more food than 2 people could possibly consume. We started with the chile con carne, which was more brothy then, stewy. The beef tips were so tender and the spice was mild but never bland. I like my chili a lot more fiery though so I was a bit let down. Still the flavor was constant and the chili a comfort on a cold night. We then tackled the combo plate, which featured pulled pork, smoked brisket, and smoked sausage. I’ve never been a fan of the traditional Texas BBQ staple of smoked sausage but that might change after enjoying this version. The smoke flavor was most prominent in this dish compared to the other two and the sausage was a perfect compliment to the sweet notes in Tubb’s sauce. The pulled pork was excellent and was the meat was not overpowered by the slightly excessive amount of sauce. The brisket was probably the low point of the meats, as the smoke flavor didn’t seem consistent through the dry meat. We also got a half rack of the baby back ribs and here’s where I did somersaults. While Smoky Jon’s on the north side of town might have the best BBQ in Madison I’m not always pleased with their ribs. El Dorado can now lay claim to the best ribs in Madison. Such tender meat with each bite raising the smoke factor. My only complaint is that you can only order half a rack as an entrée.

The sides were mostly successful as well. The chipotle potato salad was the star of the show again balancing spice and flavor perfectly. The cornbread cakes I’ve sampled before and we ended up ordering extras knowing they’d be perfect to soak up sauce, chili, etc. The worst part of the meal had to be the green chile pinto beans, which could have used more seasoning, salt, pepper…anything. Also some of the pork could have livened them up as well. Some pickles, cabbage relish and white bread round out the sides and you’ve got yourself a full mea.

Wanting to span the spectrum of the menu, we also pick out a couple of desserts. The ancho chili pecan pie is a regular on the El Dorado menu and never disappoints. A slight air of tequila and the sweetness of chocolate chips mix with the pecans. A dash of chile flakes gives the dish a little bite that satisfies as well. The almond flan was another success although I found the almond flavor coming through the crust more then the custard.

How much did we pay for all this and a Sprecher root beer? A grand total of $51! The prices come in lower than any other BBQ joint I’ve been too lately and as I said earlier the food rivals the best in Madison. The place starts doing take out after 5 but you can call after 4 to put in your order as we did. I was told the food would be ready around 5:20 and it was right on the nose. I got to the restaurant a bit early and was treated to a complimentary Lone Star beer while I waited by the friendly bartender. I was the only one waiting on a Friday night so I’m a bit worried this won’t catch on which would be a god-damn shame because the El Dorado Smokehouse is certainly one of the best take out options Madison has going today.

El Dorado Smokehouse, 744 Williamson St, Madison, WI, 608-280-WEST

Prop 8- The Musical

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

Top 5 Comics of 2008

Most Disappointing: Angel- After the Fall
Perhaps it was the fact that the number one book in this countdown is also from the Whedonverse cause this book simply pales in comparison. Following the vampire, or vampires with souls if you count Spike, this book picks up after the end of season 5 of the TV show and it just falls flat. The characterizations are on but the twists and turns feel like a Whedon tribute band. Worse yet, the art might be the worst of any book I’ve read this year. There is no consistency from page to page and unfortunately, that’s the story of the book.

5. Batman RIP
Did this tale of the Dark Knight change the face of comics as publisher DC promised? Well no but if you’re able to put that all aside you’ve got a great tale of Batman and his family. Writer Grant Morrison and artist Tony Daniel constructed a tale that drew on all the many years of history of the dynamic duo. Sure, the ending was a bit of a let down but Morrison knows his world, which can best be seen in every moment the Joker steps on the scene.

4. The Dark Tower- Long Road Home
The second set of tales in Roland the Gunslinger’s world actually improved upon the groundbreaking first series. Peter David continues to capture Stephen King’s very essence and Jae Lee’s art offers the definitive vision of his world. The third installment “Treachery” on stands now, looks like a sure fire bet for next years list.

3. Final Crisis
Here we have the second book from Grant Morrison on the list and like Batman RIP, Final Crisis has the weight of the comic book world on it. You put the word Crisis in a DC book and you’ve got immediate expectations that can crush a weak book like say Infinite Crisis. Thankfully, so far we’ve got a book that stays self-contained (mostly) and again uses the deep rich history of the DC Universe. I’m not sure if the DC Universe will be changed forever but the return of Barry Allen and the feeling that our heroes at their wits end makes this a compelling read.

2. All Star Superman
Number three in the Morrison countdown is his take on Superman. Published under DC’s All Star line Morrison does not have to be weighed down by the continuity of the current Superman books. However, Morrison again utilizes the history he wants and creates a dream Superman story that features everything you could want. Frank Quitely’s art is not what you expect for Superman but it is probably the best I’ve ever seen. The whole 12-issue run is the best Superman tale I’ve ever read and I’m a self-professed hater of the blue boy scout.

1. Buffy the Vampire Slayer- Season 8
When Buffy went off the air oh so many years ago, my soul was crushed. Reading Joss Whedon’s season 8 comic book takes me back to those days and I love it. You can just imagine Whedon working the writer’s room week to week and with the comic medium, there are no longer budgetary constraints. The last arc of 2008 featuring Whedon’s slayer of the future Fray featured everything that has made this book so great. I’d love to tell you more but if there’s one thing that’s carried over from the show it’s the amazing pacing and plot twists.

Looking Ahead to 2009: What’s going on with Batman?So while RIP and perhaps Final Crisis seem to be removing Bruce Wayne from the DC tapestry, Batman ain’t going no where. We’ve seen this dance before in Knightfall but with the current crop of lackeys (Nightwing, Robin, Jason Todd) the so called “Battle for the Cowl” sounds intriguing.

I Refuse to Call them Cheftestants: Week 4

I thought I was watching Top Chef not Next Food Network Star. This week’s episode certainly felt wrong but thankfully, it came through by making it an absolute trainwreck. Before we get to the elimination challenge, though let’s talk about the best Quickfire of the season.

The Quickfire challenge focusing on a breakfast amuse-bouche was genius. It really gives the chefs a chance to shine. I love how Padma explains that Rocco DiSpirito needs no introduction then proceeds to introduce the chef king of plastic surgery. Stefan once again shined and so did old lady Ariane. I loved Jamie’s but like Leah, I thought it was too much. Jeff also needed a lesson on what the definition of amuse-bouche is. I tell you what though; I’d like to see a cage match between Rocco and Fabio.

The kitchen run through for the Elimination Challenge was humor at its best. I was crushed to see Jamie fail but at least she had a good idea. Alex on the other hand made a horrible tactical decision. I loved to see Melissa’s weak attempt to throw Alex under the bus and truthfully, I was most intrigued by her dish. Her attempt must have worked because off he went. I struggle to understand how this still makes the chefs bring their “A” game but whatever it made the show a little better.
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35 Realizations on Turning 35 (in no particular order)

1. What happened to my movie taste? I’d rather see Bolt than Slumdog Millionaire.

2. I’m getting too old for party buses but I should never declare that I wouldn’t ride one again.

3. Bill Cosby and Eddie Murphy have both become obnoxious hypocrites of their 80’s selves.

4. I’m finding it easier to let go of TV shows. See you Terminator!

5. Therapy is not just for crazies and rich folks.

6. Everyone could probably use a few sessions of therapy.

7. I want to travel more.

8. HDTV is even better when you have it in your own home.

9. While I’m still in a musical renaissance, I find myself listening to my “oldies” more and more.

10. I will never run a marathon.

11. Looking back on 33, I realize that was my midlife crisis.

12. I hope 33 isn’t my actual midlife.

13. Living to an age greater then 60 is actually pretty appealing.

14. Lost is challenging Buffy as my favorite show of all time.

15. I still don’t get the appeal of owning versus renting but I’m at least open to the discussion.

16. We still in live in a segregated society.

17. I’ll never see a lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender person become President.

18. At 35 there’s still a lot I have to learn.

19. I’m not ashamed to say I love the Cheesecake Factory.

20. I’m still a food snob despite the previous comment.

21. I tend to structure my friendships and the people around me to suit my needs, consciously or not.

22. I’m glad I’m an only child.

23. Small families are the best.

24. I’ve actually found a career rather then a job.

25. It’s wonderful to reconnect with folks through Facebook.

26. It’s horrible who finds you on Facebook.

27. A lot of people you know from the past have turned into Jesus freaks.

28. I will always be “hip” even if it serves me no need.

29. Despite the previous observation, I will never see the High School Musical movies or Twilight.

30. I love being a dog owner but I’m still not a dog person.

31. I’m not only worthy of love but I deserve it.

32. I’m lucky to have found a partner who not only understands me but also helps me grow.

33. I’m lucky to help be able to return the favor.

34. I pretend like birthdays aren’t that big a deal but I actually make quite a big deal out of them anyway.

35. These columns are too hard to write every year.

Guns N Roses- Chinese Democracy: 17 Words for 17 Years

Not worth waiting but good.
Madagascar, Catcher in the Rye, awesome.
Stop screaming on the intros Axl.

Quick Movie Review: Bolt

When Disney and Pixar appeared that they were breaking up a few years back, Bolt was born. The fear of losing top-notch digital animation led Disney to develop their own film. At the time, I dismissed news of Bolt as a lame Disney attempt to copy Pixar but then the two sides made up. All of a sudden you had the Pixar folks coming over to help out the Disney folks. Of course the only proof on paper is the executive producer title that John Lassiter receives but if you see Bolt, you see the Pixar stamp all over the screen.

Bolt follows the Pixar formula in a couple of ways. First the voice casting is spot on. John Travolta disappears behind the white westie fur of Bolt, which was a shock to me. Susie Essman brings her trademark vulgar sass to Mittens the cat but without the actual vulgarity. The character design also mimics Pixar especially in the humans. The network head and Penny (Bolt’s person) are particularly identifiable.

So if it sounds like a Pixar and looks like a Pixar then is it as good as a Pixar? Thankfully for my post turkey addled brain, the answer was a resounding yes. I’m a little biased as I have my own Bolt at home but with that said this is a classic animated tale. The wacky cast of characters making a long journey. Thankfully there are no musical numbers and the adult winks are plentiful. While it’s no Incredibles or Wall-E, Bolt is great escapism and pretty to look at as well (do yourself a favor and spring for the extra bucks to see it in 3D).

I Refuse to Call Them Cheftestants: Week 3

Last night we got the turkey day episode of Top Chef and for a second week in a row, it left me disappointed. Due to the late hour and a belly full of turkey I will be quick this week. I did enjoy the Quickfire Challenge quite a bit. At first I let out a loud groan over the self-promoting cookbook challenge but the “switch to soup” curveball was awesome and I loved seeing the results. Jaime’s soup (pictured above) was my pick and now I want her to open an all soup emporium. The Elimination Challenge however was lacking again. I hate these buffet type challenges. While one or two a year is ok it just seems unfair to have the chefs cook in these environments if you want to see their best work. I was sad to see Richard go because he was an entertaining character. His smores did look pretty bad though. I thought Don Johnson was going to get his walking papers but his organizational skills seemed to save him. I thought the successful dishes looked like nothing special and found myself agreeing with the rest of America that of the three groups featured in last night’s ep, I’d like the Foo Fighters to cook my next Thanksgiving meal.

24: Redemption or “Insert Season 6 Joke Here”

It’s been over a year since 24 aired some fresh material and during that time, the question has been raised as to whether Jack Bauer is still relevant. Based on the 2-hour season 7 trailer, 24: Redemption, that aired this past Sunday, the answer is a resounding no. The “movie” did nothing to wet my appetite as Jack once again was trying to leave his old life behind. Guess what? Jack once again ends up back in an international quagmire thanks to his moral compass. Speaking of morals, the show has decided to bring up the legality of all the torture Jack has dealt out in the past. 24 has worked for me in the past because even in a post 9/11 world, the show is so absurd that you never take it seriously. I mean an African American as President, get out of here. However, the show starts to grind to a halt when the writers try to inject real world parallels. By putting Jack’s tactics at the forefront and by portraying those questioning his tactics as knee jerk unpatriotic liberals, the show does itself a disservice. Never mind that I’m offended but again it’s putting real world glasses over the show. If you start doing that, then we might start to question other things like what fucking year is it in the show world know. I mean every season we skip 1 to 4 years so it must be like 2040 now. Where are the flying cars? While I’ll certainly tune in at the beginning of season 7 this January due to the apparent resurrection of Soul Patch Tony, 24 is officially on a short leash.

Quick Album Review: Britney Spears- Circus

While Britney Spears latest album is supposed to drop next Tuesday, which is her (and mine) birthday, it’s currently streaming here. So while I think I get some bonus tracks or other muckity muck next week, I thought I’d hit you all with an early review. If Blackout was the beginning of Brit’s comeback then Circus is the album that fully restores her to the top. The over produced vocals of Blackout are gone but the pumping dance tracks remain. The title track is worthy of Song of the Year consideration while “If You Seek Amy” is raucous fun. Britney never has had the strongest voice but this album plays to her strong suits. The two ballads are reminiscent of early Britney and don’t inspire the instant skip that some of her later work did, especially “Out from Under”. Obviously we’re not going to break any new ground lyrically but this time around they’re more playful than hit you over the head sexual. There are a couple of tracks I could do without out including “Radar” a bonus track that was included on Blackout. Also the mid-tempo “Unusual You” drags on and on without any reward. Aside from that, Circus is Britney at her bubblegum best. Even a tawdry title like “Leather and Lace” gives way to a classic pop joint that makes you forget about the past missteps by Brit both in the studio and out.

Quick TV Review: Rick & Steve- The Happiest Gay Couple in All the World

While the Fall TV season has been a bit of a letdown, I’ve happily discovered a little animation gem on Logo…Rick & Steve- The Happiest Gay Couple in All the World. Shot in stop motion animation using Playmobile figures from our collective youth, Rick and Steve is a fun, frivolous romp.

All props for discovering this show go to Entertainment Weekly who highlighted the show a couple of weeks back. After catching a season one marathon my partner was hooked and she encouraged me to give season two a watch. The show follows the title couple as well a varied cast in their LGBT community of West Lahunga Beach. The show works best when they focus on the struggles of all the couples. Rick and Steve deal with things gay or straight couples deal with all the time in the form of ex-lovers, body image issues, and starting a family. Sometimes the show belabors the LGBT jokes and goes for the easy jokes far too often, its an overall enjoyable view.

Rick & Steve- The Happiest Gay Couple in All the World, 9pm CST, LOGO

Chain Gang: Uno’s Chicago Grill

I rarely review chain restaurants; in fact, I rarely eat at them. I believe in supporting local eateries and while situations or tastes sometimes dictate a trip to Big Bowl, Red Robin or the Claddagh Pub, I usually don’t write reviews because if you’ve been to one you’ve been to them all. Occasionally though, I have an experience so good or so bad I feel I have to share. A recent visit to Uno’s Chicago Grill has provided just that occasion.

On a recent Saturday night, my partner and I were in the mood for a deep dish pizza pie. Our choices were Madison favorite Gino’s or Uno’s (formerly Pizzeria Uno but apparently that name didn’t test well anymore). Given that it was a football Saturday, we thought it best to avoid downtown and give Uno’s a visit. Obviously, Uno’s made its name in Chicago as one of the inventors of deep dish and over the last 50 plus years has expanded all over the nation. Having been to the original in Chicago with my parents as a small child I’ve always been a fan. Sadly, I think I’ll stick to the frozen version from now on.

Chain restaurants never set themselves apart based on their cuisine so they need to deliver stunning service and Uno’s missed the mark badly. Our visit started innocently enough as we were seated moments after arriving. Our waiter Ed greeted us and took our drink orders. My partner’s Sierra Mist showed up in a timely manner but tasted like a rat had died in the line. A refill turned out better but there was no apology given by Ed and thus our evening began to decline. My margarita came about a half hour later and clearly, Ed had forgotten about it entirely. Thankfully, another staff person brought the $9 drink to our table. I love margaritas but $9 for a rail drink is just ridiculous. That being said the drink was good but coming at the same time as our appetizer is not acceptable. Speaking of said appetizer, we were pleased with the flavors of our deep fried onion strings. The lightly battered strips were fried perfectly and came with a mild jalapeno horseradish sauce. The dish would have been even better if they weren’t lukewarm. Furthermore, our request for silverware and napkins was treated with indifference. By the time our pizza finally arrived, Ed and the staff had clearly given up on even trying to please any of the customers. This time we weren’t given plates, parm or red pepper flakes. Once Ed brought those over, he left us to serve our pizza on our own. If you’ve even been to an Uno’s, you know they always sever their guests the first slices of pie. This omission was yet another nail in the coffin. As for the trademark pizza itself, the results were mostly positive. I’d say that Uno’s frozen division deserves kudos, as their version of the pie is virtually identical to the restaurant’s version. I’m not sure if that’s a rip on the restaurant version or not. Anyway as we finished our meal, Ed couldn’t get us out of there soon enough. Frankly, we couldn’t either.

Again, I expect to be underwhelmed by the food at most chain places but I always hold the service to high standards. Sadly, Uno’s Chicago Grill got failing grades on both accounts. The passable food was not enough to overcome the poor service. If you’re looking for a good deep dish in Madison, go to Gino’s and if you want Uno’s visit your grocer’s freezer.

www.unos.com

I Refuse to Call Them Cheftestants: Week 2

Top Chef made two eliminations last week so now that we’re down to 15 contestants, I might start using some proper names instead of India girl, crazy old lady, bald man #2, then again, where’s the fun in that. This week the chef’s took a big step back and so did the season.

One of the hardest things about keeping a reality show fresh is the challenges. Top Chef has excelled at this throughout its first four seasons. Last night however, the challenges just stunk, each for different reasons.

The Quickfire Challenge started innocently enough as Padma introduced guest judge extraordinaire (she also doles out the criticism regularly on Iron Chef America) Donatella Arpaia. Then Padma introduced the challenge, create your own version of a New York staple. I wish they had stopped right there or better yet, brought out the knife block and have the contestants choose from bagels, pizza, knishes, hot dogs, etc. It’s not as if New York has one iconic dish. Unfortunately, in the interest of boring TV, the producers chose only one…the hot dog. Then Padma throws in a completely unnecessary twist by bringing in the hot dog queen of Queens. She says something about the contestants having to beat the hot dog queen and my interest is piqued. In the end, though the hot dog queen is merely a confusing prop. Oh, there was some cooking too. India girl (Radhika) once again falls back on her trademark flavors that she insisted were not her trademarks. This time however, she pulls out a win. In a case of foreshadowing, Jill makes a fool of herself by using store bought hot dogs while her compatriots all made their own. In the end, it was a boring challenge and a missed opportunity.

The Elimination Challenge was even more confusing. First Padma says they’re opening a Top Chef restaurant and immediately I’m thinking we’re having an early Restaurant Wars. Then she states that they’ll all be making a New American dish and will be split into apps, entrees and desserts. Ok so they’ll be on teams then? Nope they just get to randomly choose what they want to do. There was absolutely no structure to this challenge whatsoever. The only pleasant surprise about the challenge is that the guests at the restaurants are all chefs who applied for the season but didn’t make the cut. This made for some awesome criticism. Tom Colicchio made the mistake of letting these folks stage the challenge in his flagship restaurant, Craft. After seeing the food that came out of his kitchen, I’m guessing he regrets that. Other then the inventive Carpaccio created by half of Team Europe and the corn soup created by half of Team Rainbow, the dishes looked absolutely horrible. You knew things were off to a bad start when Bald Man#2 (Josea) went for jarred crab. If you’re supposedly a seafood specialist, I’d hope you know what good seafood is! Meanwhile Jill fell in love with an ostrich egg even though she’d never used one before. Smart choice hot dog girl! Lastly, you had crazy old lady Arian complaining about making a dessert even though she chose to make a dessert. All three dishes looked like disasters but in fairness to those three, the majority of the dishes looked like crap. Arian was my pick to go as her meringue martini with cherry surprise (pictured above) looked worse then a McDonald’s yogurt parfait. Jill however was sent packing and after her inability to use the English language in defending her dish, I can’t blame the judges.

All in all just a disappointing week. Next week looks promising as the Foo Fighters show up for a Thanksgiving filmed in July. Hopefully we can see the chefs and the season rebound. On a personal note, don’t expect my coverage on the ep until Friday next week as I’ll be travelling for the holidays. Gobble gobble!

Casualty of Fall: Family Guy

Yes this is an outcome that has been foreshadowed for months, I'm dropping Family Guy. After returning from cancellation, Family Guy returned to Fox and was a fresh of breath air. Now a few years later its clear the show offers nothing but stale farts. I thought the random pop culture references were running thin last season but this season they are just relentlessly bad. Perhaps its because Seth McFarlane is spread too thin with Family Guy, the horribly bad American Dad, and the soon to premiere spin off that no one asked for, Cleveland. Maybe its just time to bring in fresh blood to the writing room. More likely though its just that there's only so many Rick Astly, Boba Fett, and Doc Brown references we can take.

On a side note that's 3 shows I've dropped so far this year while I've only added one in Fringe. 24, Lost and Dollhouse can't get here soon enough!

I Refuse to Call Them Cheftestants: Week 1

Welcome to my new weekly column recapping and reviewing the new season of Top Chef (9pm CST, Bravo!). Similar to my Runway Roundup, don’t expect a blow by blow but rather my own take on the dazzling array of dishes and egos. With that said, let’s get on to week 1.

As always, the “getting to know you” first episode is always a bit of a failure. With 17 competitors lined up you’re inevitably left trying to figure out such questions as, “which bald guy is European again?” Still if you’re a reality vet like me, you know that the overcrowded kitchen is unavoidable. A few folks stood out like the self-taught kid from Vegas. The two Euro-dudes certainly made an impression, although I’m still not sure if a vinaigrette is an emulsion. I like two thirds of Team Rainbow and better still liked their cooking. Ah yes the cooking isn’t that what we’re here for?

The first Quickfire Challenge marked the first time they’ve sent a contestant packing before the first Elimination Challenge. I was surprised to see the kid from the culinary institute struggle here as I thought his knife skills would be up to snuff since he’s using them in school everyday. Once he and his school buddy went to the final stage of the challenge and churned out apple salads, you knew they were on the chopping block. Perhaps my favorite part of the Quickfire was the Indian contestant insisting in an earlier interview that she was not going to turn out Indian cuisine and then doing a chutney when stuck in a pickle. In the end, though it probably saved her as the lady with the boring salad hit the bricks.

Having the new season in New York is obviously going to provide a wealth of opportunities for challenges. I loved last year’s first head-to-head challenge and enjoyed that the producers brought it back this year. Having the contestants create dishes from the various ethnic neighborhoods was both fun and challenging. I felt so bad for the Russian team while I marveled at the ease presented to the Italian team. Our judges were already in midseason form as they dissected the dishes. My personal favorites were the two Jamaican dishes and the Indian dishes. The culinary kid was clearly the lowest. His salmon with black rice noodles and bok choy (pictured above) looked like something out of a culinary school or worse yet a mall food court. The guy just lacked imagination and refused to learn even though he had all of Chinatown at his fingertips. Meanwhile the Vegas kid embraced the challenge of cooking Indian food for the first time. He showed off an impressive palate as he sampled dishes at the local store and then turned around and incorporated those same flavors in his dish.

It’s a long season folks but based on last night I’m expecting some drama and a hell of a lot of good food. Tom, Padma and Gail clearly enjoy this and their enthusiasm is part of what makes Top Chef the best reality show going today. Just keep it light on the Rocco this year.

Quick Music Review: The Killers New Singles

Just a couple of thoughts on two new singles by The Killers, a band I was ready to write off as stale and done.

Human- A superb Killers track. This brings to mind the band at its Mr. Brightside best. The slow/fast alternating rhythms are standard formula but Brandon Flowers seems to have found a new vocal range that really propels the track.

Spaceman- The second single off the new album Day and Age takes the formula and builds it up to a new high. It’s an anthem that deserves to play in front a crowd of 50,000 in Leeds or Bonnaroo. The Killers were beginning to come off as a self-mockery after Sam’s Town but if this is an indication of where this band is going then I want to go along for the ride.

Quick Music Review: Shiny Toy Guns- Season of Poison

Ever made an impulse purchase on iTunes? Sometimes it can pay off, like when I purchased Shiny Toy Guns album We are Pilots after their free single “Le Disko”. The album was a revelation and I had found a new favorite band. Sometimes though the impulse buy can lead to extreme self-loathing, like when I purchased Shiny Toy Guns follow up album Season of Poison. Gone is front woman Carah Faye Charnow who’s voice was absolutely enthralling on Pilots. Also gone is the electro-rock sound that defined the band. In its place is a more rock oriented vibe that evokes Fall Out Boy. Is it a horrible album? No, there are a few bright spots that either harkens back to their past like “Frozen Oceans" and the single “Ricochet”. Still I must say buyer beware if you’re expecting a Pilots repeat.

Quick Music Review: P!nk- Funhouse

With all the drama around Britney and the silliness about Beyonce and her new name, you almost forgot that pop music could be fun. In her latest album Pink brings pop back to its fun musical roots but still manages to bring some heavy lyrics. Take “Sober” where she reflects on drinking over thumping beats, and a catchy hook. Her first single “So What” is my song of the Fall and the subtly thought provoking “Ave Mary A” is an instant winner. Brit might be back but Pink never went away and Funhouse proves it.

Quick Music Review: Dillinger Four- C I V I L W A R

Six years is a lot of time to wait for a new album. Six years is even longer if it just happens to be your favorite band in the world. It’s hard not to have expectations, good or bad, when you’re waiting that long for an album. Will it be a legendary opus or will it a soul crushing defeat? CIVIL WAR the long awaited album from Minneapolis punkers, Dillinger Four falls more towards the opus then the defeat. Possessing a much cleaner, refreshed sound then their previous work, D4 still manages to punish your ears with a kinetic rock that only they can do. The highlight for me is “Gainesville” which exemplifies a typical D4 track but shows what a little more production value can do for it. The album is a bit light on vocals from bassist Paddy Costello but “Fruity Pebbles” is a classic Paddy with his gruff voice pacing a bass heavy track. Is this an instant classic for me, no, but it’s damn good listening and while Obama’s victory has erased some of the angst in me, D4 reminds me there’s plenty to be pissed off about.

A Jingle for the Product

Ok I’ve Got Some More Election Thoughts

• Well the morning has come and much to the chagrin of the gun and bible clutchers, the sky was not raining blood, abortions were not being given away on every corner, and Sesame Street was not replaced by gay porn. Obama’s America looks just about the same but you can tell that some folk have a little more spring in their step.
• Forget my misery as a Viking fan, my biggest cross to bear as a Minnesotan is our insane tendency to vote for craptacular third party candidates. First, we became a laughing stock for electing The Body our Governor. Now it looks like Jesse’s campaign director snagged enough votes to keep Norm “Bush in training” Coleman in the Senate. Seriously Gopher state, what the fuck is wrong with you?
• Perhaps more disappointing then Franken is the outcome of Prop 8 in California. While the ballots are still being counted, the outcome looks grim. The most “liberal” state in the union is about to pass an amendment banning gay marriage. This most likely will lead to the US Supreme Court and with their current make up, that’s a scary thought. While Obama’s huge win might make some of you think the culture war is over, I’m afraid it’s just getting warmed up. In other words, Canada, keep your doors open.

Final Edition: HD Elections and Thank You America For Electing Change

8pm- Showing up at my polling place this morning a whole 20 minutes ahead it opening and still being number 138 in line, almost makes my cynical heart melt. Of course turning on the TV can turn that off quickly. Here are my thoughts as of 8pm CST (stay tuned for drunken ramblings either win, or god forbid lose):

• First, the TV geek in me is loving the HD experience on NBC, CBS, and ABC (sorry Fox I’m not fair and balanced so I didn’t check on you). The continuous side data is a politicos dream.
• I miss Tim Russert more then I ever thought but NBC still has the best coverage. That being said they still haven’t learned from 2000 as they called Pennsylvania waaaay too early.
• If you’re reading this in California and haven’t voted then run out and vote against Prop 8. While I live in the backwater Midwest where the majority of our hicks think gay is a disease, you Cali folks as supposed to get it and be smarter. When the State Supreme Court legalized gay marriage last year, I predicted that it was in an effort to force the issue to a negative outcome. Prove me wrong Cali-folks and show us that you aren’t as bigoted as the rest of this country.
• Damn I wish I was in Chicago right now. That crowd is beginning to look amazing.
• I wish the local news was that compelling. With our polls just closing I’m already sick of the repeated “polls were busy”, “machines aren’t working”, and lets go to the party headquarter stories. Just stick with national stuff until you can actually tells us something other then tomorrow’s weather.
• If you haven’t guessed, I’m pulling for Obama. I’ve got to say, while I don’t find him as liberal as I’d like, I really can’t imagine what it means for us as a country if McCain wins.

Ok so at 9pm things are looking good but something tells me its still going to be a late night. Thankfully Stewart and Colbert are now up.

9:15- Maybe it's time to actually your hopes up when Colbert and Stewart are feeling so good. You gotta believe Stewart would be going off the wall crazy if McCain was looking strong.

Is anyone feeling bad for the news networks that sunk so much money into their sets only to have this wrap up at a decent hour?

Franken is still fighting in Minnesota, keep hope alive.

Anyone catch Dan Rather on HDNet? He's reporting from the Newseum! Are you kidding me, how awesome is that? I want to visit the Newseum next time I'm in HDVille. As a bonus it appears Mark Cuban and HDNet has given him a green light on rambling.

10:30- So it's official. Don't screw this up Mr. Obama. We've given you a chance. America is giving you a chance to prove that changes isn't just a catch phrase.

You gotta love that the hate the McCain babyfuckers...I mean McCain supporters, still is with them as he concedes. I'm not sure how I feel about him playing up the race card in his concession speech. It just seemed odd. Where's Sara's kids now? Her tears are the first drops in the 2012 race.

I'm also just as sore a winner as I am a loser. Don't think I'm going to buy this "we need to work together" bullshit. We had to sit through 8 years of an imperial presidency run by an evil son of a bitch (literal and figuratively). Let's give it back in spades and legalize gay marriage, ensure that Roe vs. Wade stays in tact, and get health care for every American. Oh yeah we should probably get out of that Iraq place too.

Final note, how great, and by great I mean fucking awful, was the CNN Hologram gimmick. The high note being the above picture.

Why Don’t I Love Zack and Miri Make a Porno?

If you’re new to the blog, then let me introduce myself, I’m Elliot the Kevin Smith whore. Yes I’ll take my Kevin Smith any way I can get it. I’ve seen all his films on their opening weekends. I’ve got all of them on DVD and have logged double-digit viewings on each. I’ve listened to every commentary, unearthed every Easter egg, and watched every deleted scene. I’ve read every comic book the man has penned, right down to that 3 year opus that was Spidey and Black Cat. I started watching Reaper on the CW partly because Kev directed the pilot. I even own all the Inaction Figures he’s produced including a signed Silent Bob figure on my porch. Yes I’m a whore for Smith, which is why this review has taken me two days to write.


Zack and Miri Make a Porno is the latest flick from Smith and is the first one that has not stuck with me after viewing. That’s not to say this isn’t a quality flick. It’s funny as hell, has a kick ass soundtrack, and for the adolescent boy crowd, plenty of titties. Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks really deliver as the title characters that after hitting rock bottom make the natural decision to erase their debt by making porn. Rogen is at home in a Kevin Smith film as his rough exterior with a heart of gold shtick really works here. Sure we’ve seen it before in Knocked Up but it still works even if it’s getting a bit old. Banks, who really showed her comedy chops on Scrubs the last two seasons, gives the film a solid base but still manages to add a fair amount of physical giggles to the screen. Craig Robinson (The Office) is the clear breakout star. Over the course of the flick he seems to get all the best lines. The rest of the supporting cast is on their game including Smith stalwart Jason Mewes. Stepping outside of the “Jay” comfort zone, Mewes doesn’t exactly redefine himself as an actor but certainly shows some different range. The movie has plenty of great moments and the chemistry between Rogen and Banks makes the inevitable relationship storyline believable. In the end though I’m left wanting more.

Smith’s films have always spoken to me on a very personal level. Whether it was the parallels in my own life on screen or the inspiration he provided to me as a writer and filmmaker, Smith spoke to me on some level whether it was the Green Arrow comic book or the lunacy of Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. Chasing Amy and Clerks II are two of my favorite movies not because of the amazing look of the films, but because the story Smith tells is something I can identify with. Zack and Miri is a cute film but in the end there is no part that speaks to me. I feel like we’ve watched Smith grow as a person and filmmaker with each flick and here there is no growth. Again it’s a good flick and maybe I’m just one of those crazy demanding fans that wants more. I still recommend seeing it and will probably pick it up on DVD in a few months. I’ll also probably pick up the latest DVD of Smith doing his public speaking gigs (Threevning with Kevin Smith). Then again maybe I’m just growing out of dick and fart jokes. Jesus I hope not.

Casualty of Fall: Chuck

TV viewing is a weird thing, at least for me. I sit here on a Wednesday and I honestly can’t give a compelling reason as to why I’m still watching the miserable limp dog that is Heroes and yet I’m giving up Chuck. Perhaps it’s the fact that when Heroes was at its high point, it was sky fucking high, while Chuck at its best is merely solid entertainment. Either way as of today I’m saying gone to the staff at Buy More with little more then a shrug.

Chuck started out with a great premise. Nerd gets government secrets downloaded into brain and is thrust into the life of a secret agent. Good premise and for the most part good delivery. The cast has been strong over the first season and a half, and the stories have been entertaining but it just feels like they’ve played themselves out. I remember when the show launched, creator Josh Schwartz (OC, Gossip Girl) said he wanted to avoid getting bogged down in an overarching mythology. Come on Josh you gotta have some in order to keep a show like this moving forward. Without it, the show has become an action version of Everybody Loves Ray. Sure you don’t mind if it comes on at 10pm why you’re lying in bed, but episode 110 is no different then episode 510. Ray is insensitive to Debra, his parents are wacky, and Robert is depressed. With Chuck you can be sure the Buy More staff is up to something under the nose of Big Mike, Chuck is out of his comfort zone on a mission, and his CIA watchers want to kiss him or kill him. The show carries off this formula with great precision and effectiveness but it hardly makes for must see TV. The back story with former Sarah paramour and Chuck buddy Bryce Larkin had potential but was quickly snuffed out. I expect the same will occur with newly arrived Jordana Brewster as Chuck’s ex. Again I want to reiterate that this is not a bad show, it’s just not a great show and in today’s world that’s what I need from my TV. Unless you’re Heroes, then apparently I give you endless chances to disappoint me.

First Impressions: Guitar Hero World Tour

My Wii has become a tool for two things, rhythm music games and the Wii Fit. I know it can do so much more but truth is that’s all I really want or have time for when it comes to my video game experience. When it was revealed that the latest installment of the mother of all music games was going to feature multiple instruments, ala Rock Band, you best believe I stood up and took notice.

Yes, Guitar Hero World Tour has arrived in all its glory. To prepare for its arrival I traded in GH3, GH Aerosmith, and my American Idol Karaoke. I cashed in my change jar and if I had a child, I’m pretty sure I would have raided their college fund. Why such a mad dash of cash collection? The hefty price tag of the complete band set is $189.99. So now the question is, was it worth it? I’ve spent about a day with my new BFF and so far so good god that’s amazing!

Obviously, the biggest selling point on this version of GH is the addition of other instruments. As I wobbled in at midnight Saturday with the 30lb. box of equipment, I questioned whether this was truly worth the money or the trouble. After all, I already live in a two guitar household and who really wants to drum and sing anyway. That question faded as I assembled the set in my living room. First of all, the revised guitar offers some great new features and is not simply a retread. The designers have added a Star Power button so that folks who like to play seated don’t have to jerk violently to get the bonus points. In addition, they’ve added a slide neck that allows you to play different notes without strumming. I took the tutorial and these and understood it perfectly but was completely lost when it came to actual game play. I believe I’ve got more studying to do. The microphone and vocals are similar to any Karaoke Revolution game you’ve ever played. Pitch and rhythm are the keys and not so much the words. On our third song as a band, we got an old Oasis song that we couldn’t remember so there was a lot of “la la la”. Then of course, there are the biggums, the drums. Three drum pads, two cymbals and a kick pedal make up the set and it does so in a very contained space. The six options are all color coded like the guitar and come with a pair of wooden drumsticks. Being that we are new to the world of fake drums, my partner and I took turns at the drum tutorial on the game and the drums are certainly no throw away addition. The combos and rhythms that the drums demand make it a challenging addition to any GH vet or newcomer. The drums themselves are relatively quiet, so don’t worry about the neighbor folks. Location and impact are the keys to hitting the right note. You can’t just bang anywhere on the pad to get the desired reaction, as even on easy you must hit the center of the pad with a decent amount of pressure. While the drums felt incredibly difficult at first, by the end of the night I was playing along with numerous tracks including the awesome drum line of Lenny Kravitz’s “Are You Gonna Go My Way”.

Speaking of music, Guitar Hero World Tour has taken the rhythm game genre to a new height once again. All the 86 tracks are master recordings so no more covers. The music spans many genres and decades as we played some Willie, Michael Jackson, 311, and Linkin Park yesterday. There are also some personal favorites like Motorhead and NoFX. Best of all for Wii owners, we finally have downloadable content. Already available are some Metallica tracks and a few oldies like “Jessie’s Girl”.

Game modes also seem to be a huge improvement on this installment. So far we’ve only tackled a couple but the list seems almost daunting. I’ve mentioned them already but the tutorials are very helpful especially for the drums. We also started a career as a band and this mode seems to have expanded greatly, most likely due to the sheer volume of music. I also took a quick ride through the Quickplay mode, which now allows you to create set lists so you don’t have to play one song and then go back to the menu. The Wii version also features a Mii Freestyle mode, which I’m looking forward to sampling. Finally, there’s the Music Studio mode, which allows you to create your own music. This seems like the natural progression for the franchise and once we tackle it I expect I’ll be back with a further review.

That being said, there is already so much that I love about GH World Tour after only 1 day. This is clearly the start of a new relationship that will last a lifetime or at least until Wii Sports 2.

Early Bird Review: 30 Rock Season 3 Premiere

The season 3 debut of the best comedy on TV, 30 Rock, is now available online here. Imagine my surprise that NBC and the good folks at Sheinhardt Wigs are giving us a sneak peek a week early. So how does the show stack up against last year’s strong strike shortened year? In a word, passable. The problem with the third season opener is that it is weighed down with the messy job of righting the cliffhangers of last year (if you can even call them that). While I love Will Arnett’s Devon half of the episode is spent wrapping up his tenure as NBC president and it feels more like an obligation than an invitation to funny. On the other hand the guest appearance of Meghan Mullahy as Liz Lemon’s adoption worker is just perfect. Even annoying guest stars like Mullahy shine on 30 Rock. There are some great one-liners and a great definition of rumors. With all the guest stars the strong cast of supporting players take a back seat and miss out on the funny even when they’re on screen. I don’t mean to be such a negative nancy because truth is I laughed a lot and my overriding reaction was gratitude, gratitude that the best comedy on TV is back.

Quick Unbox Review: Baby Mama

Last Friday my partner and I sat down with nothing to do for the first time in months. With the knowledge that we both had to be out the door early in the morning we settled in and downloaded a flick off of Amazon Unbox and onto our TiVo. First of all I can’t say enough about this service. While the selection is somewhat limited, the downloads are quick and the picture quality is high. Sure a DVD from Netflix would look a little better but for instantaneous gratification, you can’t beat Unbox. That all being said, let’s move on to the flick itself.

Baby Mama is the kind of throwaway movie that makes you smile and laugh but breaks down if you think about it too much. In brief, anytime you have Tina Fey and Amy Pohler on camera together, you’ve got comedy gold. Unfortunately the two are often saddled with extra set pieces and a sappy dopey plot you see a mile awhile. Fey and Pohler did some rewrites on this script but it still feels like an old Meg Ryan or Debra Messing vehicle. You have the feeling if Fey had passed, this would have come out starring Katherine Heigl and Jessica Simpson. The two leading men could have been anyone, and while Greg Kinnear is his normal affable self, Dax Shepherd is quickly proving he’s only worthy of playing a variation on the white trash role he perfected on Punked. Fey and Pohler do provide the laughs especially when they’re riffing on each other. You have a feeling that might have been more on the cutting room floor but at over 90 minutes this film runs long enough. Final verdict is that this is a good movie for background entertainment and if you can get past the predictable ending and musical montage you’ve got yourself a passable Fey/Pohler vehicle. Onward and upward ladies.

Reality Check Up: The Amazing Race

Last month, The Amazing Race once again took home the Emmy for Best Reality Competition and after the first few eps of the new season I’m beginning to question why. I’ve always been a huge Race fan. While Survivor, The Real World, and The Apprentice tend to showcase the worst in humanity, Race has often highlighted some of the better qualities. Sure there’s always a couple of “ugly Americans” who say some horribly insulting things about other countries and their cultures, but for the most part you get to see people broaden their horizons while competing in a competition that rewards brains and brawn but not duplicity. I’ve also always complemented the show for their diversity of contestants and the limited tweaking they’ve given the format. That being said, like most great shows you get the feeling that Race has begun to fizzle out. Truthfully a big part of that is the lack of new places and challenges. There are only so many variations you can do on a needle in a haystack challenge, and only so many times Peru can seem new and wonderful. This season smells routine and while I’ve got my favorites (Ken and Tina or Nick and Starr), there just aren’t any personalities that grab you. I’m by no means advocating the show gets the ax but perhaps its time to take it off it’s pedestal. With Top Chef a few weeks from returning I don’t think there’s any doubt that it has now become the number one reality show, surpassing it’s former network brethren Project Runway. Meanwhile perhaps Race can look toward some minor tweaking. A second All Star challenge could be fun or even a strangers edition where the teams come in blind. In the end though I think its time for another show to start making room on their mantel for Emmy.

Runway Roundup: Finale

And so here we are, the first three-way dance between an all lady group of contestants. There was little drama in the last days leading up to the show (except for surprise judge Tim Gunn) so let’s get right to the collections.

Kenley
I think my partner captured Kenley’s collection best when she mentioned that despite the amazing effort put in by painting the fabric she could have found those fabrics pre-made. A little more time put into the design and not the fabric could have pushed her collection from good to great. While I did not swoon over any one piece I also wasn’t turned completely off. The closest was the blue/green Sean Young Blade Runner dress (pictured above) which seemed like she stole it off the Warner Brothers lot. Perhaps the biggest complaint I can give is that she had a rather poorly paced show. There was certainly cohesion in the looks but I thought the flow just wasn’t there and that’s so important when winning over the judges. I think it was predictable that she was the first one out.

Korto
No one this season did pants or color better then Korto and her show certainly proved that. Unfortunately neither of them met in her collection. I loved the white pants suit (pictured above) and the way the top looked but I wish it had been in the vibrant green color that made up the dazzling evening gown she finished the show with. I thought she edited her looks but they were still a bit overworked. Her beadwork was too distracting at times. The show did run at an amazing pace. The color transitions were top notch and for a moment I thought she might have pulled off the upset, but then we had…

Leanne
Even though I was rooting for her, I must say Leanne had the best show hands down. Her concept intrigued me the most when Tim visited the finalists last week and she did not disappoint. Right from the top she dazzled with her first look (pictured above). The pedal skirt that was repeated in other variations was an eye catcher as was the structured top. The wave architecture truly stood out and carried over every piece. Her variety of pants, skirts, jackets, and gowns made the lack of color virtually unnoticeable. Perhaps the best example was the vest and pants look pictured above. It completely personified the finer qualities of Leanne as a designer. It was impeccably made, featured beautiful structure, and grabbed your attention with every step down the runway.

While I’m sure the judging was close, it was clear the Leanne deserved the title because she has so much to offer. With Runways status in doubt thanks to lawsuits and channel switching, this finale leaves the show’s legacy in good stead.

Madison Restaurant Review: Liliana’s

As a self-confessed foodie, I must admit I usually plan my restaurant attack meticulously. That being said there are times when I allow myself to fly by the seat of my pants (or be pushed by my partner). Sunday night was probably the best result of such an effort as I discovered Liliana’s in Fitchburg. Stuck next to a local chain, restaurant Liliana’s exterior doesn’t stand out but upon entering, you’re immediately drawn in to the décor. The smells of the Creole menu jump out at you right away while the walls adorned with images of jazz and the city, individually illuminated with accent lighting. The drink menu is a bit crazy but I was very pleased with my Tidal Wave Hurricane made with blue curaco, vodka, and lemon/lime.

I tend to love my New Orleans cuisine spicy hot which is certainly one way to go. Liliana’s on the other hand opts for a spice that hits quickly and then fades to a blend of flavors.

Up first was a pair of starters. An order of hushpuppies was near perfect. The corn meal was speckled with bits of cranberry and jalapeno and fried perfectly. Better yet was the cheddar cheese at the center of the hushpuppies although every nugget varied greatly in how melted it was. I would have preferred to see the inside match the consistency of the perfectly fried outer shell. Our second dish was the soup of the day, a butternut squash with pumpkin accents. My partner found the soup to be completely satisfying yet I thought the pumpkin oil and roasted seeds overpowered the sweetness of the squash.

The two entrees we picked grabbed out attention immediately and we were not let down. My shrimp and crawfish etoufee had a great kick as it hit my tongue but that faded to a bouquet of flavors. The shrimp and crawfish were as fresh as could be. My partner had the pasta Liliana that was composed of blackened shrimp, chicken and andouille sausage in a red pepper cream sauce. The pappardelle that this was all laid over was some of the finest fresh pasta I’ve had in months. Again, the spice had a nice initial burst and then mellowed to a nice complex flavor.

Perhaps the most pleasant surprise of the evening came as we got the bill and discovered that this somewhat extravagant meal was less then $30 a person. Liliana’s is quite the suburban gem and a much-needed addition to the chain filled Fitchburg.

Liliana’s, 2951 Triverton Pike, Fitchburg, WI (608) 442-4444

It's Official...Britney's Back

A couple of weeks ago I unofficially lifted my moratorium on the Britney dance but after listening to last year's stellar album and the new single out this week, I'm officially ready to say Britney's back y'all. Enjoy the second coming.

Reality Check Up: Top Design

Halfway through and the long wait between seasons hardly seems worth it for Bravo's Top Design. Todd Oldham is seen far too infrequently. Kelly Wearstler has been keeping her insane sense of style relatively in check (except for the hair pictured above). The challenges have been bland and the new host India Hicks seems to have gone to the Donald Trump School of voiceover hosting. Thankfully, the designers have kept the show afloat. Sure, we just lost opera singing Whizzit but there’s still a worthy cast of characters. Nathan and Martha Stewart minion Eddie certainly appear to be the most talented. Mrs. Ricky Schroeder is holding on for dear life but is certainly entertaining as is 12 year old (as Jonathon Adler describes her) Natalie. No matter which designer you’re pulling for they are all delivery, some top designs. Still I need some drama mixed with my quality design otherwise, I’d just watch HGTV.

Runway Roundup: Week 13

If you read last week’s installment, you know that I was pretty fed up with Project Runway. The final challenge felt lackluster and the gimmick of delaying the final elimination until the finale left me bored and disinterested. In short, the 2-part finale had some work to do in order to make this season memorable. After last night’s first hour, I’d say there’s still plenty of work to do.

The two final twists last night went a long way towards restoring my faith in Heidi and company. Asking the designers to include a wedding dress in their collections is downright ballsy. Wedding dresses are the bane of a designer’s existence (unless you’re Vera Wang). Then on top of that, they threw a bridesmaid dress at the designers upon their return to NYC. Now that’s a twist I can get behind.

As Tim visited the designers, you got the idea that some were fairing better then others. My girl Leanne already had a great start on her collection and the wave inspiration fits her architectural leaning and her usual color palette. Kenley made me look like Nostradamus as she unveiled to Tim a stunning lineup. I hate the girl but I must say I was impressed. Jerrell on the other hand realized my worse fears. His collection looked sloppy and costumey. Poor Korto looked to be on the right track but her wedding dress, even in its early stage, raised a huge red flag.

The eventual runway show bore all these estimations to be true. Leanne not only made a stunning wedding dress but also the best bridesmaid dress of the group. Not only that but it certainly wet my appetite for seeing her entire collection as it tied into her them perfectly. Kenley made a dress that was a bit Bjork at the Oscars but was undeniably beautiful. Her bridesmaid dress was nice but I didn’t love it as much as Michael or Nina. Korto really shocked me with her wedding gown. Not only did the color choice scream prom dress but also the fit was downright horrible. While I certainly appreciate that Korto designs for every woman, this dress was not wearable by any woman. Her bridesmaid dress looked like an after thought and I thought for sure she was out. Then of course, there was Jerrell. His love of quirky headpieces finally got the best of him as he was sent home. His wedding dress (pictured above) was too much look. It’s as if he lost the eraser that was helping him edit so well over the last few weeks. So in the end Jerrell sucked more then Korto and I’m happy about it. While ideally I would have like to see Kenley get the ax, Korto has much more potential at Bryant Park then Jerrell does. That being said, here are my odds:

5 to 1: Korto
Her style and taste have been flawless since week 3 except for the wedding dress. She certainly will give the crowd something different but I’m concerned it will alienate the judges.

3 to 1: Kenley
Clearly, the judges love her aesthetic even if they don’t like the girl. Kenley has been a one trick pony for the most part but that one trick can be fabulous. Given the time and budget of the final collection, I would not be shocked if she pulls off the win.

3 to 2: Leanne
I’m not just putting Leanne as the favorite since I picked her as a winner early on or because she’s my favorite. However let’s face facts folks; I’ve picked the winner early on for the last 2 seasons. Simply put Leanne makes beautiful clothes that are different and classic at the same time. Her clean lines are breathtaking. My only concern is that her pieces for Fashion Week turn out too casual.